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To be loved or not to be
Love is an action, not just words
I tend to hear people say they “love me”
But they hardly ever call
They say they “love me”
But they never want to meet up
They say they “love me”
But aren’t there for me
I see the action of avoidance
Not love.
I see them make effort for someone else
But not for me.
Is this a glitch?
Why am...
Wednesday 18th September 2024 3:07 pm
Delusion.
Delusion.
When delusion wears of
and finally
you see
what u didn’t want to
for so long
that this person
isn’t the person
saving you
loving you
the only person
able to do that
is you
babe.
Tuesday 20th August 2024 4:41 pm
Life.
Life.
Every day.
Is one day closer
to you
not being anymore.
Being alive
unsure
questioning
doubting.
Nothing is ultimate
besides
this
exact
moment.
You can never go back
you can wish for it
everyday
but you can’t
and you never will.
Tuesday 20th August 2024 4:28 pm
Trust...
They reach me,
And,
I give them my all,
Yet after that,
They leave me Alone.
They will come back,
Once again, for sure,
With a different face,
A different name,
A new personality,
All along,
And once again,
I will give them my all,
Will they, this time
Stay by my side?
I don't know,
But that's how Trust works,
That's how Life works.
Friday 22nd September 2023 10:49 am
Jaroor koee baat hai?
Hai nahin aasaan phir bhee,
doobana mujhe aa gaya.
beech dariya door hai,
main to kinaare aa gaya.
chamachamaate-timatimaate
hain khilaune haath mein.
kyon hai udaas phir bhee vo?
jaroor koee baat hai.
jal raha hai ghar vo usaka,
bas roshanee use dikh rahee.
kya mila hai isako aisa?
kyon yoon muskura raha?
jaroor koee baat hai,
jaroor koee baat hai?
- Jitendra Suryavans...
Monday 17th July 2023 4:00 am
Snow
It's cold outside, there he is.
Standing in the snow with the letter from his father.
Just found out it was his last letter from his father, regretting for that silly fight about christmasday.
Realizing that is was his last christmas.
Walking between those fast cars thinking and thinking.
What if I stop?
Is it all worth it?
Was it all worth it?
What should I do?
There he was, looking ...
Wednesday 10th November 2021 4:40 pm
Burning Gold
you've ignited a fire
deep within my soul
that once was a blue ember
now burns gold
Tuesday 30th March 2021 3:10 am
Sunshine & Rainbows
the sun lay beating on my breast
warm rays of sunshine pierced my skin
but i do not dare let them in
my life is empty
i am cold
from all the stories in my head
the past it haunts me through the night
with fiery flames it burns me
the shadows from once where there was light
creep across my skin
sinking deeper and deeper within
i fight and scream but nothing gives
...Tuesday 30th March 2021 3:07 am
LOVE IS A GAMBLE
To love deeply is like wearing your heart on the outside of your body
Uncaged
Uncovered
Protect it like you would a baby
Motherd
Protected not smothered
Be gentle oh fragile one's Hearts
Be careful with the heart of another
If broken I fear that this time this Heart may never recover
Wednesday 17th February 2021 1:13 am
TRYING..
She was trying
Trying to be calm
Trying to mute the
Monologue inside her mind.
Full of contradictions to herself,
Full of arguments
Full of endless thoughts
She felt like being pulled
In a spiral
Down and down and down
With each breath she took
Swallowing her own soul
As if she split up
Into two halves
Halves against each other
She was he...
Thursday 23rd July 2020 5:13 pm
Train station
And I waited hours on that station,
for the train
Which didn't even start it's journey!
Saturday 2nd May 2020 11:34 pm
In search of an identity......
All I see is a mist of darkness,
With nowhere to thread my feet in,
In World where there is absence of kindness,
I see a light of hope so thin.
I can’t go on; my body and my soul are giving in,
There’s no fire in belly to seek reasons for my quest,
With efforts and motivation of my kith and kin,
Now, I go along the path where the birds fly in the air so clean.
Then, I arrive at the gates o...
Wednesday 4th December 2019 5:03 pm
Her Name Is E...
A day without E is better off Breathless,
May my soul escape if my stream is empty.
Seek and find the girl named E,
packed with love she doesn't discriminate,
Her race is spectrum body tailored to your preference.
Undergo E she'll turn the toughest man empathetic.
Open your eyes wide as the sky,
Her love brings out a high unreal,
to experience one must be willing ...
Saturday 25th May 2019 9:21 am
Addiction Spell
A desire stronger than the weight of the world, nothing in life matters more than the intake of poison, fogged mind and clouded vision,
Tell Me What's Love Compared To Addiction
controlled by controlled substance your own worst enemy living physically but empty mentally,
Happiness Depleted Unless Using Of Course My Best Friend Is My Drug Of Choice
scared of facing withdrawals to much p...
Friday 24th May 2019 7:15 am
Alien
‘At least your skin isn’t black’ as if that changes anything or makes it better.
I am still as foreign with my white skin. With my ‘funny sounding’ language,
in a country where people don’t understand the concept of knowing
different languages, where they know no other, except for their own.
One. And only.
Where I can’t spe...
Friday 10th May 2019 1:05 pm
FRIENDSHIP
Some Friends are necessary for life.
As the air. As the water and food
Those friends, help us, to survive
In our hearts running, same as blood
They offer faithful trusted advice
And always keep the shining smile
Show satisfaction pureily, so nice
Have bounties tool, deeply as Nile
They never get argument to complain
They ever look for the cheerful talk to ...
Wednesday 20th March 2019 12:57 pm
HELP!!
Is it a Curse .. or God's Grace
To live alone heart and place
Suffering what I always face
Hopeless to be myself again
Are these changes good for me
To be lonely always or not to be
To live away of what I see
I lost my hope and brain
Sadly to wake up and sleep
Painful to feel yourself cheap
Living alone hurts in deep
I wish to know why, but i...
Wednesday 13th March 2019 8:00 am
دكتور عصافير (VET)
ريشه ناقصة في جناح عصفوره
إيه يعنى .. ماهـو ريشها كتيــــر
مش حيبــــــــان أبدا في الصورة
ولا حيــــكـون له كمــــــان تأثير
العصفــورة الشــــاطرة تفكــــــر
ربنا عنـــــــده كنــــــوز الخيـــر
لو تدعــــى ربنــــــــا يرزقـــــها
بدل الريشـــــة .. عشـــر قناطير
لكن العــصفــــورة المســكــيـنــة
وقـفـت تبـكـى بدون تفـكـيــــــــر
حتى اصحابها .. زعلوا عشانــها
...
Saturday 9th March 2019 12:37 pm
Sitting by the river on an old bench behind an abandoned church
Our secret spot for my punk and I to witness the changing season in the colours of the leaves and identifying the signs of the new season where we shared our fears and dreams
Ate junk food and laughed even though the reality of our life was a mess
And I didn’t let it show I told my baby-girl we were on vacation when we were h...
Monday 4th March 2019 5:45 pm
A Recipe for Happiness
Find the darkness in your days,
and kill it in the silent nights,
then let others notice and say,
your shine has gone up to what heights.
Yet don't be done with what you have,
just spread your wings and jump to fly,
there's much you have done yesterday,
there's more you have to do tonight.
When you watch the tables turn,
and god takes test at every turn,
the...
Tuesday 25th December 2018 10:25 am
Used to
I used to be happy
I used to smile
But I am broken
It's been this way for awhile
I used to dream big
I used to be strong
Life got in the way
And it didn't take long
Lying in bed
My heart is racing
My mind won't shut off
These thoughts that I'm facing
Maybe they're better off
Without the burden of me
I feel so lost and alone
I can sense th...
Wednesday 11th July 2018 11:42 am
Free-Falling
I’m losing my mind.
Don’t you understand?
I’m desperately reaching out for your hand.
Don’t leave me hanging, slipping, falling…
down into the endless abyss of darkness,
Never destined to land.
You’ve saved me once before,
But this time there are no safety ropes.
I’m free-falling, plummeting, going down…
My only hope Is for you to save me now.
I’m losing my ...
Monday 18th June 2018 2:59 pm
Real Life Nightmare
Every moment to fear,
Forever holding back internal tears.
Life- so complicated,
forever indecisive.
The world too big, too scary,
my mind so full of queries.
Never certain, never happy,
each decision could be deadly.
An escapes impossible,
every outcomes implausible.
Sinking under water,
Always being taken for a martyr.
The pain runs so deep,
Barely able to ...
Sunday 17th June 2018 11:34 pm
In The End
How can I cope with this devil on my shoulder, The heat is on but its making me colder, When I was younger it hoped I’d grow older, Started off small now it’s heavier than a boulder,
You say I’m fine well I’m sick in the head, You say I‘ll cope well I’m sick of this mess, I don’t know how long I can stick with this stress, If it was my way then I would’ve writ this in red,
I’m go...
Wednesday 16th May 2018 10:00 pm
Story of Night
So you are lost in dreams so deep whole night
And I long to hear phone's beep whole night
At dawn, I realised, my awakening
Though my destiny remained asleep whole night
I know the remedy, I know the toxin..
What to lose, and what to keep whole night
She might have waited for me to take her back
This is what made me to weep whole night
Sharafat, night is...
Thursday 18th January 2018 4:40 pm
Lost Soul
Plagued by depression
on a blades edge reflecting.
He feel the cold steel caress him
soul peeled from presence now his ghost fill the heavens.
Bereft lady luck so he swigged liquid death,
push needle past flesh to rid evils banish stress.
Demons vanquish men a past hollowed by the pen,
hollow eyed again sparking up the stem
he prophesied at Zen.
Self destructive,
liquor burst the walls o...
Tuesday 19th December 2017 3:23 pm
Charlie Clark
Charlie clark.
Huron high school has Randy as a coach.
Animal. What my dogs are.
Randy, the coach for huron.
Lebanon is a country.
I like pizza.
Eat pizza everyday.
Charlie Clark
Live everyday. Die.
ABT’s are food I like
Rabies is a disease
Kalahari is a place I go
Thank you
-Charlie Clark.
Monday 25th September 2017 2:57 pm
.
And I want to be a better man to you mum.. .
But you just don't agree with the things I have done, while I don't agree with having
to be socially accepted I need to conform, but you don't understand.
I live for myself in a flurried world.
Where being myself is such a crime and I can't imagine myself alive, at the thought of cheating my own mind...
It breaks me apart!
...Saturday 2nd September 2017 8:40 pm
Charlie Clark
Charlie clark.
Huron high school has Randy as a coach.
Animal. What my dogs are.
Randy, the coach for huron.
Lebanon is a country.
I like pizza.
Eat pizza everyday.
Charlie Clark
Live everyday. Die.
ABT’s are food I like
Rabies is a disease
Kalahari is a place I go
Thank you
-Charlie Clark.
Wednesday 8th March 2017 8:19 pm
Aokigahara
Aokigahara.
Take me away,
let me find a place of peace,
of freedom,
Somewhere i belong.
Somewhere i can take myself off track,
hear the trees calling
the whispers of the dead,
the footsteps leading a path to nowhere.
The silence of horror,
the selfishness, the selfless.
A place of no evil, a place of no light.
Where no man or woman will have sight,
where no man or woman will ha...
Wednesday 1st February 2017 6:11 pm
Trust is an illusion
Trust is an illusion. A systematically flawed word. A total forgery of a statement. Trust assumes infallibility - without errors, mistakes or fuck ups. How do we trust others when we can't even trust ourselves .. If the potential gain outweighs the potential risk we're likely to oblige. Whether the repercussions be momentary or long standing, we're going to indulge in whatever we feel is beneficia...
Tuesday 11th October 2016 8:40 pm
Rehab
"It's like you built a mountain of cocaine for me to get addicted to but then you put me into rehab for snorting in one line."
Friday 22nd May 2015 5:49 am
A Broken Mind, a Sound Body
My head hurts
My eyes are spinning
Friday 22nd May 2015 2:51 am
untitled
Anarchy runs through my bones, A sanctuary, a mind set in stone, No worth in a life without purpose, Enough people around me trying to surplus, Without reason or must. Society isn't run from home, We're fed a diet of lies and bad omens, A curfew on our personal time, Cursing those who brave past the line, Fucking with your mind. Sobriety is harshly overrated, When the priority is to...
Saturday 2nd May 2015 6:16 am
The Rise and Fall of the Stronghold of Love
When others are in love
Things can go so well
yet at many other times
it seems as though they fell
Friday 13th March 2015 9:06 pm
Blue Iris
On your royal blue wings
lies a small yellow river
of golden sunshine
Your eyes open up
and see the whole world
for all of its beauty
Next to you
you see a tall flower
and you move towards it
You can only go so far
before your roots hold you still
and cause you to fall
down
down
down
As your roots are pulled up
you are pushed down
...Friday 13th March 2015 2:44 am
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