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Beating myself up

entry picture

Is there something wrong with you?

Here we are again, back at square fucking one.

All because poor little cameron can’t seem to control his feelings.

Pathetic.

Do you have a few loose screws?

You literally choose to love people who just don’t care.

And when you cry at night, does it feel good?

Relapse, do you think you should?

Because as far as I can tell,

You’re going t...

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anxietysad poetry

Calming Waters

Waves crashing

in and out

up and down

pushing and pulling

 

A knock on the door

beating louder and louder

waking my fibers

restless and unrelenting

 

Louder it knocks

heartbeat pulsing

anxiety levels rise

these fears in me won't subside

 

Breathing in and out

imagining the waves 

the calming waters 

I am one with them

and how they rise again

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anxietycalmwater

When People Ask

When people ask me how I'm doing I want to tell them the truth. 

That my depression is the captor I can not escape from. 

That my heart longs for the attention I don't sustain. 

That my ears burn waiting for you to tell me you feel the same. 

I want to tell you that depression has invited anxiety over.

Again. 

Yes... that is the third time this week. Thanks for noticing. 

Tryi...

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AngeranxietydepressionFuck Anxiety

Just Be

Just be?

Believe me!

Scream! 

Just see this beast!

- Many screams -

By me, of mine, and me

At someone’s pair of legs poking out from under my bed

When they disappear,

I remind me: they were never here

But why do people say “in your head”?

When it can make you scream, 

And grow big in length and width

Until it cannot fit “in your head”

When it can breathe life...

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anxietyconfusiondepressionhallucinatehallucinationinternaljourneymedicationmental healthmisunderstoodpanic attackprescribePsychologyPsychosisquirkyself acceptancestruggletherapyunderstandingvision

Don't Forget To Breathe

Stuttering awake
in the anxious hours
when white noise
no longer lets you sleep
In the mattress springs
a metronome
your percussive heartbeat
one thought then another
one worry trailed by the next
did what was said make sense?
was it understood
will this be good enough
impossible options
improbable odds
suddenly so awake
in the anxious hours
don’t forget
to breathe

Stuttering a...

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anxietybreathinginsomniasleeplessness

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