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depression (Remove filter)

unachievable dreams

didn't wake up with the intention of being bad

I don't know why there's a pit in my stomach when no one is dead

run around my house and verbally beat up my dad

the screams sound bloodshed

 

he says, "there's so much you wanna do" 

and i obvert my eyes

wait around for a mental break-through

and make unachievable plans doing the highs

 

i wanna be a savior

and get th...

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sadteenagegirlteenagerrelationship with parentsdepressionanxietypoetry

In Case I Lose This Fight

I almost killed myself tonight,

I ran out of reasons to live and reasons to fight.

Each day is a battle just to survive,

How is it that I am expected to thrive?

 

The loneliness in this house is overbearing,

I feel like a fool for even caring.

All I need is to be loved and feel wanted,

But my reality is the opposite while my brain is haunted.

 

Nothing I say or do wil...

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depressionhelplesshopelessself-destructionfragileflawedeasily brokendarkraw poetryvulnerable

When The Darkness Falls

It’s colder now and seems somehow

more empty than before.

I wish I’d known the future then,

and what it held in store.

No longer is there will of heart

to venture form these walls,

and so I sit alone inside…

when the darkness falls.

 

Each stone hand crafted for the cause

to block away the pain.

The mortar mixed to guarantee

no feeling will remain.

A mist ens...

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darknessdepressionemptiness

chronic pain

i'm sick of doing the best i can
because it isn't ever enough
if I can't be good,
what's the point of being here at all?

I never sleep well anymore
even though I tell the doctors I sleep fine
I just stare at the ceiling
and live through the lives of others

sit in class with an ache behind my eyes
I can't even tell if the pain is real
excedrin can only do so much
and I think my toler...

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depressionhypochondriahypochondriacpainhealthhealth anxietymental healthfamily

supporting the economy

my worth is always fluctuating
you talk to me like I'm worth nothing
but when it's past nine pm I'm priceless
I can't tell if I'm a commodity

you told me you liked me out of the blue
it was almost out of impulse
like that pretty journal, you bought but never used
both are just things that are nice to have around

you didn't need to do that
you had plenty of things at home stuffed in yo...

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economyimpulsivedepressionshoppingrelationshipsituationship

the moon and the sun

told me i’d only fail

laugh and my hopes and dreams

act as if i’m frail

there’s often reoccurring themes 

 

you know i’m not dumb 

it’s just that you don’t care

so don’t ask me for gum

and don’t you give me that stare

 

i don’t know how we ever got along 

we’re opposites like the moon and the sun

you probably think you’re the moon, but i think you’re wrong

yo...

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friendsmoonsunspacesaddepressioncruel

Freefall

Sat through another non-eventful free fall through the ceiling

while trying hard to feel something despite the way I'm feeling.

 

Trying hard to find my way back to the time of when

I didn't have to sit in this damn chair time and again.

 

For every day now seems a bit more like the day before.

Just like a cross between a treadmill and revolving door,

 

where weeks and m...

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struggledepressionmental illness

Exit

It’s finally the day to come,

blood mixing in.

Flows like a river

through oceans of sin.

 

Long past the point

where the numbness was new.

Long past believing

that anything’s true.

 

Steel against flint,

only flash in this night.

Desperate to see

but it only ignites,

 

the gasoline soaked

twisted rags in my soul.

No way to stop it

and nowhere t...

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brokendownbeatengiving updepressionheartache

Days End

The days don’t seem to give a damn,

they march in step of time.

They stare ahead with eyes of steel

while never breaking line.

 

They torture me with disregard,

they tread upon my soul.

They seem so unaware I’m here,

they simply come and go.

 

I once believed the day would come,

I hoped that it would give

the thing that I was searching for -

a reason I should...

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depressionstrugglesuicide

Lightening

Lightening burns and strains my mind

Freezes my thoughts like a photo

Open to think again

Alive again to life ever after 

For now at least

Lifting me from depressions hungry jaw

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lighteningdepressionmindclearthoughts

Sorrow's Bounty

In a world of plenty, where joy should reign,

A soul wanders lost, drowning in pain.

He has it all, or so it seems,

Yet inside, he's adrift in shattered dreams.

 

Possessions many, but feelings in drought,

Tears concealed, smiles worn throughout.

Once in a while, breaks down unseen, 

In the quiet ache, where joy's been.

 

Everything's there, yet nothing to hold,

A ...

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depressionplentyabundancelifesorrowcrypain

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