It’s hidden well, but I search deep within the crevices of your mind.
I interpret your words and actions to depict intention and longing, want and need.
They’re masked behind masculinity; hidden within the social construct that disallows you to be free....to feel.
That which praises to the appeal of lust; turns love to dust.
Strong enough to break a woman’s heart, but no strength to trust us.

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aghast, I'd not seen her for ages

a ghost of love my mind engages

but fate had turned cruel pages

beauty once soared from these features

hottest among human creatures

Nefertiti of love's teachers

still young, my experience rare

she'd flown me gently to her lair

the first woman I witnessed bare

two hawks preen on a pyramid

pecking morsels of new killed k...

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When they say to stay gold

Is it for bright days to sit between your ears?

All the cotton clouds, two or three, right there?

Or is it to find strength for your arms to pull you over the mossed edge?

Mama cried after every light accomplishment

Whether it be reinstated love or you set a day aside for treks and hikes

Or graduated from University

You seen Mama cry when t...

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She had moonlight in her eyes

Starlight in her hair

Her smile became the sunrise

That burned away despair

She took me to the clouds

Weaved rainbows from the grey

And showed me all the colours

That life had on display

And under starry skies

Where galaxies unfold dreams

We ran into the cosmos

To find its hidden seams 

But I lost you to the star...

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I think it's the third twinkle down

(Alioth)

In the constellation of Ursa Major

Where she sits

All sparkly with stardust

And cheesy-gobbed from moon food

Gran said that God had came and 

plucked her right off the earth

A car was an odd choice of plucking

But, that's what he chose

With all her beautiful smiley curls of gold

And shimmery eyes of sapphires

I t...

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Why must you? If I could just understand the reasons for your soul-reaping hand. 

Who decided the time was up? Or that we must endure this grief? Tell me, Death- Do you enjoy your role as loves thief? 

You broke my heart into pieces a few times before and now you've done it once more. 

I'm not sure I can forgive you for such dark spite because you've taken my world and turned out its ligh...

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And on a lonely seat in a cold winter night where it all began. Yearning for what once was, but not still and never again.

Was it hope bewitching my mind. Thinking all ache has passed. Or was it true serenity that was too rare to last.

In the dark of night my mind wanders free. Seeking a relief beyond my reach.

Then the day comes and it's darker still. Though the sun shines bright, my sunrise i...

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When you told me you thought you were dying
You grabbed my hand in desperation almost crying
You took me outside alone to tell me ..
I asked your reasons you couldn't tell me
I looked at you why were you shaking
You told me some things that  didnt seem to fit
You confessed you had a habit but still that wasn't it
You repeated to me "im dying "
As I write this I'm crying
And this is over t...

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I am so scared

My heart will not stop pounding

I miss you so much

It was wonderful seeing you today

We connect and click in every way

But I am so scared you are going to choose him again and not me

I am so scared we will never be

I am so scared that if I am not with you

Then my life is most certainly through

I am so scared.

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My lover lives inside of long exposures
She breathes inside of my flashlight 
The shutter gazes wide eyed into darkness
I write her notes with this wavering beam
Capture my fast fading dreams by sunrise 

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Soaring clouds cloak rising sun, vigorous brightness, morning whiteness
Lightness, creeping upon those weeping sightless, dark blindness lifting in slightness
Rightness becomes a non factor, heart like a melted down reactor spitting smoke
Go for broke, break it all, the inevitable fall comes swiftly, will twist thee into submission 
Nature's battle of attrition, cruelty ingrained into life lik...

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When you left, you took a piece of my heart

When you left, my whole world came tumbling down

I became so lost

I was left in the dark

You took with you my light 

When you left, I learned to fight

I learned to navigate this world without you by my side

I learned to be strong to no longer rely on your love

You thought I was weak,

For feeling too much

Now, you're the one ...

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One whole year's

time emptied

Like lace leaves

From the cold trees

Skeletal wisps

You are missing 

attic tinsel 

Boxed deep and dusting

With bristles flaking

From the broken spine

So no silver lines 

Our crisp, black-branched pine.

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Endora:

I can’t breath, my lungs are burning 

Everything around me is twirling.

Everything inside me squeezes eminently, grabbing away my desire to live on.

I am filled with pain, till my last bone. 

My eyes are full of blood rivers.

He is dying in the roaring silence.

Lucas:

As I opened my eyes,

I saw dazzling stars dancing in the sunset 

It was as quiet as a de...

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The distraction machine, our plastic dream, sew last seam through bottom lip
Tipped off of ship, sheet bound tissue is ripped, living form clipped to fish food
Always in a bad mood, waiting on the never happens, inevitabilities stacking
Reef wrapping around your sea urchin heart, leaping off cliffs with no running start
Failure practiced as art, life pushed around in a cart, walking on rusty n...

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amid starlight she reposes

my life's in her lizard face

that library of dusty looks

records my fall from grace

she took the best from me

sucking me dry every day

each wrinkle taunting me

dry pointers to my decay

I pray she does not wake

no pity runs in my veins

but violation at the sight

of what sleep she feigns

she's a monument to loss

contami...

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They say hope is such a wonderful thing
Keeps us strong against anything
But be careful what you hope for
Or it will do you in.

So many times I thought I understood
Who people were, and what was good
Only to find, what's left behind
Is broken dreams.

And they say grief is a natural thing
As we get used to what's missing
And find out how to do without
What we used to need.

But the...

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A Love Song

   (forever) 

There was a time

When love defined 

All of the things 

life could show

So undermined 

By routine & time 

Upon our own tide 

we ebb and we flow 

A fork in the road

A different abode 

What would these old eyes

Of mine now see? 

Perhaps without love

Perhaps then I could

Get over how much

You mean to me 

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