loss (Remove filter)
ashes from your urn
Ashen grey is the house of remembering.
Before each portal opens,
your faceless bard swoons.
He strikes a drum of bone and brittle whispers;
With cracked powd’ry fingers,
he inscribes your name in dust.
He etches it longer than it ever was,
the curves of your urn.
You gather there your ashes and nourish my soul.
Sunday 24th November 2024 7:26 am
The Breaking Point: The Silent Decent
This poem tries to capture the pain of watching a friend succumb to addiction, bound to a destructive habit that erodes both health and hope. As one friend struggles with the limits of friendship and "agape", the other slips further and further away, lost in a cycle that breaks promises and bodies alike. This poem hopefully serves as both plea and ultimatum—a haunting look at the cost of holding o...
Wednesday 13th November 2024 4:47 pm
I once had an older sister
I once had an older sister
I once had an older cousin sister;
Used to come over for summer vacations
and other auspicious occasions,
many times I cried to make you stay
for little longer,
Now you're gone for ever;
To return never.
The fun we had at beaches and seashores,
Could I ever forget?
The laughter you had in arcades and photos;
Was it all a facade...
Thursday 7th November 2024 4:48 pm
Oh, Brother
Just over a year since I lost my Brother.
I lost my Brother, and my poetry went with him
Words replaced by a bottomless hollow
Knowing he had no more tomorrows
The words I needed drifted away
Like smoke adrift on the bleakest day
Forever drowning in a sea of grey
Amidst its melancholic sway
He enjoyed a drink, and liked a fag
But was the best big brothe...
Wednesday 30th October 2024 2:22 pm
She left home
She left home like a stranger in the night
No goodbye for the parents behind her
Shattered, broken and distraught
This isn't what they thought
Estranged and departed
Seperated and disheartened
Where do you belong?
Now you know there's something wrong
Meanwhile the parents stay
Like sharks circling at your bay
Only time will tell
In heaven or hell
...
Thursday 17th October 2024 3:49 pm
Dear Absent Friend
Dear absent friend
Are you still there?
Do you still lurk in the places we used to?
Or have you moved on to pastures new?
Dear absent friend
Do I ever cross your mind?
Even on days with no rain from the skies
It rains from my eyes
Dear absent friend
I long to hear your voice
For your asks I could not fulfill
But I miss you still
Dear absent friend
I hope that you are happy
H...
Monday 16th September 2024 9:24 am
A love only Grandma can give
There isn’t enough hugs that grandma can give me that I’ll be satisfied with
If I could I would enveloped myself in her arms for eternity
The safeness that I feel within her warm embrace is not something this world can replicate
She embodies the love that people in this world long after
Her love shines brightly on her face whenever she sees me
And my cheeks can’t help but hurt w...
Sunday 15th September 2024 8:00 pm
I am capable of love
Words can be weaponised
Be careful with the words you use
What might be a throw away sentence to you
Forever imprinted, taunting anothers mind
When you chose these words
Did you remember the things about me which only you know
The secrets I don't share freely
But entrusted with you
People have preconceived notions
Ready to label and validate assumptions
You saw behind the mask
Y...
Friday 6th September 2024 8:35 am
Pain Relief
When will it go away?
The pain in my chest
Pain in my stomach
Pain.
It’s repetitive and never stops
It creeps up on me like bugs
Stings like a wasp
Bites like a mosquito
And leaves, taking a small part of me
Some say it’s a part of life
Maybe I don’t want that
If this is life
Maybe I don’t want any p...
Saturday 24th August 2024 7:00 pm
Allow yourself to heal
You talk about the past as it defines you
I hope one day you look past the pain and trama
For there is a gift inside you
For the world to see
Your kind and caring personality
You are not a prisoner of your past
Your prison cell has always been open
It time for you to walk on through
And let the world in and all it has to offers you
Nothing is ever broken or beyond repair
It takes tim...
Monday 22nd July 2024 9:19 am
Chair
It's a chair,
just a chair
on four legs
standing there.
Facing out,
turned away
been empty now
more than a day.
The cleaner
fumigates all trace,
of he who filled
its cushioned space.
As indentations
slowly fade,
the invoice settled
the debts all paid.
Will the trees outside
miss his stare
when someone else
sits in h...
Sunday 7th July 2024 3:41 pm
Running
Have you ever stopped to ask why do I run
Ironically its only when you stop the mind runs wild
We run to be fit
We run to be social
We run to be healthy
But is it always healthy to run
I run for a different life I cannot have
I run Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday
My love runs Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday
I started so I could support her
To let her know I was with her eve...
Sunday 7th July 2024 11:43 am
Three dots
Three dots bounce with so much meaning
She is still there
We are connected once again
The light is green
For a moment we are back
But as quick as it comes it must go
Holding onto the green till the last moment
But must it go
Are the dots a pause
Till we are ready to reconnect
Are the dots hiding the sinister end
Or are the dots hiding the life we could have
Th...
Friday 5th July 2024 1:39 pm
Left
Left
5:27 am
It is time to get up.
Airport.
Shower – I use the woman’s fancy shampoo.
Toothpaste, lotion, brush; done – in the black hygiene bag.
The woman enters the bedroom to check on me, “You have everything?”
“Yes,” I say, “I think so; if I leave anything, you could send it to me?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Okay,” I say. She walks to the kitchen and sits down softly with ...
Monday 24th June 2024 5:50 pm
Tide Pools
A cigarette glows
reflected in the truck windshield
careening through the city night
These headlight beams
fruitlessly searching
for something gone
The Grand Rapids highways
never take me where I want to be
not even close
I drink awhile at Anchor bar
a quarter spinning on the table
thoughts go round, keep coming back
'til my skull's swimming too
Two more beers
heads they’re mine
t...
Monday 24th June 2024 4:41 pm
Hebridean Graves
A Sea Loch Graveyard walled and gated
hues of purple peated earth,
the stones stand stoic, weather dated,
washed up from their briny birth.
Some names unknown "A Sailor" lies,
in silence resting side by side.
Adrift they came from distant skies
as tears that fell, though never cried.
On other shores long lives lived out
to wonder at what might have been,
...Tuesday 18th June 2024 1:57 pm
Claws of Love, Kiss of Death
Hand reach into my throat,
clawing their way to my heart.
Red blooms under their attention,
as they slither through this maze
of veins and vessels.
Slick hands grab ahold of my still heart,
squeezing it manually.
Once, twice, thrice,
a soothing rhythm in a space,
long devoid of music.
Yet, no amount of squeezing
is enough to make my heart start beating.
No amoun...
Saturday 15th June 2024 12:37 pm
Face in the crowd
I pick your face out from the crowd
And you're all I can see
As we pretend to be strangers
I waited the one hour train journey
Hoping you would join me
But you never did
We remained separated by a single carriage
Little did I know you had far more in your arsenal to separate us
A Trident like deterrent
How did it come to this?
Well actually I do know the answer...
Friday 14th June 2024 11:52 am
The Last Train
We stood on the bridge watching
the train approach
The steam dampening our faces
as it passed under
It was warm, then cold
I grabbed my brothers hand
and we ran to the other side
But, the train had gone,
along with my brother.
The imprint of his hand
still lay in mine
But time had taken them both.
I stood there for days, weeks,
Perhaps, months
Perhaps,...
Friday 31st May 2024 4:32 pm
Angels Call
At a loss to know what happened, I did not see you fall
I wasn't there, I didn't see when Angels came to call
A world without, memories now is all I see
I leave you now, to say your own soliloquy.....
This is could be my own exposition,
Bills, money, world events, my own loneliness decision
People all around me but I'm hiding the pain
Physical illness or mental strife is all that I gain
...
Tuesday 16th April 2024 2:20 pm
Do you remember?
Do you remember those that are gone,
Taken so young, to cancer and war
Or teenage bravado, mental health
a lost passion for life, happiness, wealth
Do you remember those not here
Taken to soon, before a life or career
Before the chance to leave a mark on this world, gone before parents, family, friends, all those dear
Do you remember those that were friends
Taken so quickly, before ...
Sunday 14th April 2024 8:48 pm
The Loss
Every loss is felt
Just as a ripple is spelt in water
Ever decreasing, calming asunder
A clock ticks in a house even emptier than before
The dark lingers in a hall still and sure
The cat rules now
Wondering why and how
Water weeps from a pungent wound
Never to be cleaned but to neglect and fester
Such a thought no beautiful sight could hinder
Leaving the los...
Monday 8th April 2024 3:25 pm
What's Left Of Love
Too many nights, too many times
I've woke in sweat and had to find
a way to push you out again,
and pray once more that this will end.
That from my heart you'll finally leave
and not come back into my dreams.
For I am old enough to know
the years have made our love run cold.
And I am wise enough to see…
I only love your memory.
Thursday 21st March 2024 1:25 am
Sunset Memory
An old porch swing made once for two.
Cool night breeze calling out to you.
Ten thousand memories rise above,
the sunset waters of our love.
Just like the day slips into the night,
the love we had that was oh so right
it slipped away. It slipped away,
like day slips into night.
Was our love doomed to come and pass,
one day as fire, one day as ash?
Night afte...
Saturday 16th March 2024 10:40 am
Same Old Song
The torn remain
of what was plain
waves now ore frozen ground,
in winds that blow
cold ice and snow
and other feelings down.
There isn’t much
left in a touch
to calm the trembling hand.
For winter’s chill
falls colder still
in cloak across the land.
The settled dust
and cankered rust
guard safe against the grain,
while fading dim
from deep ...
Friday 15th March 2024 9:11 pm
Alone
I wish it would have been a war
that was the explanation for
the reason you are not around,
the reason I don’t hear the sound
of your voice anymore.
No, I don’t hear it anymore.
And I wish it were all a dream
although a bad one it would seem,
cuz then at least I’d have the chance
to open up my eyes and glance
upon your face, but I don’t see it.
No, not anymo...
Monday 4th March 2024 4:13 pm
Til Time Stands Still
It was a beautiful story,
I wish it was my own.
It makes me think of you,
so every now and then
I turn it on.
Was the first song we danced to,
it made us fall in love.
Now every time it plays
I see your face,
you’re all I think of.
Why does it seem true loves
are always kept apart?
Is it cruel fate,
a form of bait
that’s used to crush the he...
Friday 23rd February 2024 1:37 am
On the line
Darkness shrouds the train
Blue flashes flicker in the rain
Alone with strangers left to hide
As a man lies down on the line
Time stands still when death enters
The breath becomes hard to centre
My luck at catching the last train
Becomes silence in the rain
Everyone is on the line
Phones in hand, not the time
Words turn inwards
Soiled and sinful
...
Thursday 22nd February 2024 3:24 pm
Treading Water
We sit across from eachother
Our hands clasped tightly over the table
And in this moment we have everything
And yet we have nothing at the same time
Eyes locked on our targets
I can see your soul
It's calling me like a beacon
And I feel awoken
We lean in closer to this moment
Feeding off the energy like vultures to flesh
I could drown in those blue eyes
If I ...
Thursday 22nd February 2024 12:09 pm
Final Farewell
My Darling,
You hold so much sadness in your eyes
I can almost touch the scars of your soul and cry
The twin flame I once saw in you
Turned into a stranger
Whom my heart cannot recognise
Someone I never knew
Thinking of life without you
Makes me feel as though
I will never see summertime again
And the coldness of an eternal winter fills me with woe
No matt...
Sunday 4th February 2024 12:23 pm
Wednesday
Wednesday was always our day
The only constant across the many variations of “us”
Drinking as friends in the pub
Drinking as “friends” in the pub
Your hand on my knee in the pub
Definitely more than friends in the pub
Kissing in the pub
Sharing our scars in the pub
Falling in love in the pub
Laughing less in the pub
Difficult conversations in the pub
Crying in the ...
Wednesday 31st January 2024 7:19 pm
The splinter inside me
The memory of your love remains like a splinter inside me
I can get by now most of the time, with it undetected
But every so often it will still catch on something and snag
The essence of you has gone through me like a thread through the eye of a needle
I continue my life, with you stitched into everything that I do
It gets heavy, carrying around the weight of this loss
I remin...
Tuesday 30th January 2024 11:00 am
Today my friend buries her mother
Today my friend buries her mother in a coffin she has painted by hand. Today my friend's father tells her that she has taken on too much responsibility in the matter. She tells me he made her feel like she did not have a choice. Today I will get my hair cut. Today by mid day my friend will have buried her mother. My friend is only twenty four. Her daughter is two. I ask my friend how she has been ...
Tuesday 30th January 2024 8:45 am
Home is where the heart is
We have something
I know this because I keep trying to tell myself it's nothing
To help me walk away
But we always come back like the tide to the shoreline
Coming back to you is like coming home
Coming home in the dark of night when you've left the light on
The rush of warm air that greets you as you step inside
Close the front door behind you
Home
You were my home
Monday 29th January 2024 6:08 pm
Oxymoron
How can one be so consumed by emptiness
Isnt that an oxymoron
The presence of your absence is felt always
We talk in terminal language
Yet it still feels unfinished
A connection was made which cannot be undone
I am forever changed
Your love is not unrequited
See there are things we still share
Monday 29th January 2024 12:45 pm
Monster in the Mirror
They say that twin flames go through periods of separation
And this I know to be true
For you were right, we did need this time apart
However, I am praying it doesn’t last
I needed to discover me and you needed to discover you
Because even though we are one, our souls have still been split in two
And we needed to work on ourselves separately
In order to reunite anew
...
Wednesday 24th January 2024 2:08 pm
Ode to Percy…(a cats best friend)
Watching the leaves fall
Standing so tall
Waiting at the window
I still wonder
It wasn't so long ago
I can still see us
Haunting shadows in the dusk
Running, fighting, climbing
Making footprints in the snow
Your furry figure lingers at the edges of my mind
Gone but not forgotten
Your smile runs to hide
Sunny days fade away
As your ghost lies st...
Wednesday 24th January 2024 9:57 am
Soulmate Symphonies
If you desire to heal, let yourself fall ill
You desired peace
So undoubtedly, with every hardship, there comes ease
If you only have the strength to believe
I forgive you for doing as you please
I am proud of the changes I have seen
It’s making me believe, perhaps you are changing into the man I knew you would be
I believe you may have read my words
And I want you t...
Sunday 21st January 2024 12:39 pm
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