Poetry Blogs (self love)

Focused on piercing eyes, light hazel abyss

I reached down earnestly past orbiting hips

Fingers parting engorged velvety lips

To find within my now aching, sensitive, turgid tip.

Writhing, squirming

Unprepared and panicked

Intensity unparalleled

Myself, I know not what to do with.

Tears, laughter

All consuming heat and fleeting chills

Dreams are becoming rea...

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I am sad. 

I am worthless. 

I am unlovable. 

Nobody loves me.

I do not deserve to be loved. 

I don't matter. 

I have no matter.

The world would be a better place without me. 

 Nobody cares whether I'm dead or alive.

I wish I were dead. 

-depression

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You always see

when people trip and fall 

face first onto a knee,

The shear panic of a red warm pool. 

People crowd and care, 

Rushing to rescue. 

Drip, drip, drip,

The skin now stained

seeping from veins,

Pumping like a bad memory,

Fixated on the blood

people forget the scars,

Not the one oozing with puss

but the one deep-rooted, 

Crying out for atte...

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~A fractured mosaic staring back at me

Shades of blue, brown, yellow, gray and green

Are the stitching that weave this being together

A fabrication of vibrant parts synthesizing to make a real whole

The real me~

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I woke up today feeling a bit numb

I woke up today feeling like everything will be fine

I woke up today and decided that I was done

I woke up today and cried

Then I looked in the mirror, I said, " Girl you look fine!"

Then another voice said, " Don't you dare give up!"

So I put on a happy face,

And I headed out to find that girl I once was....

Happy. Beautiful. Strong

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what used to hurt me

still does

what used to scare me

still does

what used to make me curl up on the floor

shaking to my very core

still does

I am constantly afraid that one day

I will come face to face with my mistakes

a tableau of painful regrets and aches

the times I said I couldn’t when I could

the times I said I wouldn’t when I would

the past stil...

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He loves her but, 
she loves him,
but he loves the mirror 
like his lost love loves selfies.

Adoration, pointing every direction, 
like weather vanes in a hurricane.

Each unware their 
love affair 
is bound to end. 

Love lessons often repeat 
until we understand that 
real love begins within, 
then overflows to others, 

making the circle of love 
complete. 

###

https://...

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Bring Back the Pin Up

I was a sexual woman

I was…

Until my consent and its importance,

I was robbed of.

This is the year where-

I rediscover her

In my coven

Friend to friend

My witchy woman tell me how to be-

A proud feminine,

Love bug again

I know, I know!

I will observe you in your glory

Take notes, mimic my old self and copy-

My memory

When i was ...

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Where’s The Sun?

I used to orgasm imagining i was running to-

The sun.

To reach climax for the relief was spiritual

Sex for me has remained-

Emotional.

Now it’s perverse and sexual.

So, I hide inside-

The dark of the night

And only come out when the moon says

You’re safe now.

He has my best interests in his heart filled with craters

Other women scarred with play...

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It's time to let go.

It's time to move on from the past, 

from whatever it is holding you back

The random pain from memories 

coming back to you as if two years was instead, two months ago

It's time to be free of all that is not meant to be

You know and I know 

The universe will show you which way to go 

Find true connection from within

Only then will you find clarity 

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Me, where is she

squeeze my skin, the flesh

it’s not me

I love me

the love I have lives deep

it’s far, so far beneath my cheeks

I wish I could hug me

to make myself believe

that with a finger touch it’s me

so then I’d see

that I am not this temporary body

and what I am is free

but Earth demands an anchor, you see

unfortunately for me

because it becomes all...

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As I continue to reflect on our relationship, both the good along with all the troubles,  I find myself to be more and more at peace with my actions and role our relationship.  What I continue to take away is that you cannot change someone.  It is impossible.  However, what is, is the possibility to always change yourself, and hopefully change how others see themselves, others, and see a different...

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We've just met. 

And it's wobbly.

Uneasy.

Trying to get it's footing. 

Hauling an anchor off. 

To make a match, 

I must go down 

or you must come up. 

Maybe I must come up  

and you must go down. 

Sticky sweet harmony. 

And it's nice to go up. 

Literally uplifting. 

To go down 

is to forgo. 

If I refuse 

or if you refuse, 

discord strikes 

and ...

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I've done something clever.

And the usual movie begins to roll. 

Applause!

And sometimes not. 

Sometimes no one is there to clap. 

I imagine it. 

It's always perfect.

But it's the movies. 

Stuck on a silver screen. 

Not to mention you are all in bubbles. 

Films in development. 

Running a muck.

With wonky projectors.

And absentminded directors.

It's how it ...

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I'm here 

but gone. 

I've got my hands already in the soil

but my body's here on the carpet. 

How can I stay in this moment 

when my heart has been on the road for 10 hours already. 

Learn that though. 

Start now.

I said this nearly a year ago.

I turned my head from it. 

Tried to rearrange the past.

What is needed is movement.

Specifically forward. 

I'll have...

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He wraps me up

in HIS love. 

But my love is not right. 

Not enough he says. 

There's a lock on the outside of the door now. 

Too much, too much,

TOO MUCH!

Hit the road Jack!

He's out the door 

and I don't miss him.

The young girl pushes the screen bent 

and jumps out the window.

I wince in preparation for her crumpled body. 

But she's a cat 

and lands soft...

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It is time for Renewal and Rebirth!

The shedding of habits, worry, and fear

Letting go will put my mind at ease.

I no longer want to feed stress and self doubt,

In the corners of my mind they disappear.

I wash away the negativity,

I wash away the pain,

I wash away the regret,

My goal is no longer to please.

My heart will no longer hurt,

I will put mysel...

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Tell me why I need you to see me. 

Tel me why I care what you see. 

TELL ME! 

You have nothing to say.

You never have.

But I've reenacted your story a million times. 

And oh yes!

I gathered evidence. 

Because you did reject me. 

Because you told me you needed to see me.

Because you told me what you wanted to see. 

But the thing I will tell you...

...

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In a state of being exposed.

Bring forth thyself and bare it.

Within the dark slimy chasm called "us" I've plucked shame.

Too naked for my liking.

Clothes of conformity fit perfectly.

But the tag's not been cut.

Oh, it's irritating!

But in a way that festers quietly and often unobserved.   

It doesn't like being ignored. 

It needs my attention.

So it twists. 

And m...

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Eyes that seek truth,

A heart that knows no bounds

A mind that eludes and intimidates

A soul that is and always was free

Determined and passionate

Emotional but strong

I can get through anything

Even when I don't want to

There are times when I do not know myself

These times are hard

Patience will show my path

I'm so grateful I was not alone

I'm still not al...

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I'm my own worst enemy,
It's funny how that works.
To see nothing great in me,
To question, "what's my worth?"

Looking in the mirror,
All I see is filth,
But the mirror isn't dirty,
It's just the figures spilth.

People try to compliment me,
But I only disagree,
Not seeing what they see,
They must say not what they mean.

I need more motivation.
My job is nothing great.
I need to work ...

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Learning to love yourself is gruelling. Every flaw, every mistake, every quirk. Only us ourselves know how characteristically flawed we truly are. So we hide. Hide behind make up, clothes and materials.

Social media enables us to create an ideology of the person we think we are, the person we want to be. But in the midst of the night we lie awake contemplating ourselves. Questioning our choices...

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