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bee keepers waltz (03/15/2024)

you make me feel

like a bee in a dandelion field  


nourished and sunny


scattered to the warmth of the wind

that carried the ocean to the plains 

to above the lakes

to the cracks I'm the sidewalks

 where we met

where we keep meeting 

where you held my hand 

and keep holding 

through the rain

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new year, new me.

I'm looking at all the warning signs. Staring them straight in the face and baring my claws.

Will I bite?

I scream, scratch, scare everyone away but wish for someone to stay.

I will not be absent from myself. My emotions, hobbies, wants, and needs must be safe, secured, unable to be touched by any partner, by any friendship or by anyone, Please.

Retiring the word gaslightng and leaning...

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new yearhappy new yeargrowthmeselfadulting2023

The melodic grass

This music,

it makes me want to fall from the water

float in the sky,

stare at those lips

and kiss those green eyes,

drink from the clouds

and jump on the pond

to feel the stars

and gaze at the stones,



the rythms , the notes

melt my mind

ignite my visible voice

I'm not here nor there

maybe inside a void


floating on the blues

maybe its a d...

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Nobody knows me,

Not even myself

I meet people everyday

I talk , I laugh , I smile

Others say that I lie.


I’m complicated, orphic

 hard to understand

Just like the way we don’t know                                                                                                                      what happens in between the oceans.                         


I’m an...

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I’m on a level of being

Where I know the direction I’m following

Where I know I’ll be fine, even if I’m alone

Where I’m aware of my worth

Where I know I’m strong enough

Where I’m aware of my strengths

Where I’m brave enough to walk all alone


I have freed myself from the chains

From the judgments

From the council of hate

From the bars of anxiety


I have unc...

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Write for me?

will you write for me?

If I say your words can save me

if I say your art can heal me

will you try?


Will you draw for me?

If I pull my arm apart for you

trim my fingernails, hand a brush to you

should I try?


Where’s your masterpiece?

Empty canvas, left my chest open to you

plunged a needle inside, drained my blood for you

is it dry?


Where’s the lif...

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Love lostmesorrowgrief

Let me be; Set me free

kiss me on the mouth

let me be; set me free

to be trapped against you

pain I wish nothing on

to wrap arms you know

i can not deny

when to hold her brings joy

let me know

let me be; set me free

wish against me not away

to understand nothing is a void

unhappiness be where you know not

do not fight, my love

endings to soon to show

but listen to direction and ...

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lovepainendbeginningquitbelieveherhimmei love you

Reflection in mirror


My eyes are deep and full of experience
Life has shaped my fragile mind now one of a pessimist 
Didnt I ever learn disobedience always has its conscience?
Wish my mind wasnt one of a adolence 
I dream to be accepted 
and loved for a selfless heart
But much much of my life
I felt lonely and treated more bogart
I guess, its just my luck 
With pour decisions and irrational thoughts
I k...

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loving myselfMe

Headstrong Tornado

Headstrong Tornado

I feel like I failed myself for not joining the Royal Air Force

I wanted to join for years ever since I was a kid

But my teenage moods got in the way

Like they did with most other things

And still do but I see them for what they are, moods

Which stopped me from being elite

And serving my country and deterring the enemy

Be it Soviet Russia or anyone else


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I Find Beauty in Whats Different

true beauty comes from the radiance and uniqueness of something standing out like a fire lit in the night sky... what i find beautiful, is something different. something that is unlike anything or anyone else. it'll stand out.. have a purpose, a meaning, or just something beautifully different to look and find interest in.. something that has so many more "shades" and colors rather than just one. ...

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understandinginner self poemmenaomi

Best Friends Forever.

I've got me a best friend
His name is Jack
I put him on rocks
Then mix him with black

He and I hang
With a lady named Mary
Jane is her last name
Though I'm careful not to carry

When we're all together
My troubles slip away
I don't worry about anything
But I have to watch what I say

We get into some trouble
But most of the time we're
All alone in my room
With a twelve pack of b...

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I Know Who I Am

Eyes that seek truth,

A heart that knows no bounds

A mind that eludes and intimidates

A soul that is and always was free

Determined and passionate

Emotional but strong

I can get through anything

Even when I don't want to


There are times when I do not know myself

These times are hard

Patience will show my path

I'm so grateful I was not alone

I'm still not al...

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meself loveloveselflovingi amsoulmindhearteternal loveemotional

little Big man

Five foot two, eyes of blue

Goes a certain song

Both were true but not nearly enough 

To describe this true and happy man

With a big beaming smile he'd enter your life

Open arms and so open hearted

Energy enough for all of us, for each and every day

To carry us all along the way

Never told always showed

The best and winning way

He led by example on how to be

A true...

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availableDadhappinesslove Shanklymestrong

Housewives, Magic Circles, and Poetic Gimmicks.

Quirky, by all means

is such

a fucking awful word

that was most likely 

made by

Housewife Culture.

Something to describe those that fell outside

of the 

circle of Baseball Caps and Poodle Skirts

while still finding themselves

safe in their presence.

But now

It has been adopted

by underage



Parents who use it to describe


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QuirkyMeMyselfKidBadBad poetryConnor Lannes


The waves come and go
And the sea remains the sea

The reflections come and go
And the mirror remains the mirror

Joy and misery come and go
What remains is what is me

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memirrorSeaself reflection

String Me Along

String me along with the kites that you fly,

Threaded between the clouds and the starlight.

You'll never believe the view from up here.

Covering lies.

Developing lives.

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Answer to a Prayer

I was kind of hoping,
That you would come along,
Like the answer to a prayer,
And the music to a song.

Like the kind of thing that happens,
At a special place and time,
That will change our lives forever,
Like a fantasy of mine.

The fantasy was there before,
I ever knew your name,
And now that I have found you,
We will never be the same.

So, pardon, if I look at you,
Forgive me ...

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love without laws

In love there is no law

Just the dreams that you saw

An open mind can be the key

Think wisely and you will see


You cannot run from tomorrow

Happiness is all you need to know

One future to live for another time

Maybe with fewer mountains to climb


The worries of the caring heart

Love that cannot be measured by a chart

Feelings of the unknown trust

Genuine f...

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Promise Me

When my hands begin to tremble

You’ll place your hand in mine

When my eyes become hollow

That you’ll gaze into them

When I’m at a loss for words

You’ll kiss me so the silence

Can speak for the both of us.

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In the nascent

empty vessels of time,

I hear your voice.

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The weight of the world on a spider’s web.

Everything is relative, life force flows in each blade of glass.

In each house is a guy or a gal just like me.

I see them from the Edge. This epiphany is mine.

Soon to leave my northern lands, south bound.

Writing to where? Autumn views from

Oldham Edge. When will I return?



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heavy worldthin weblifemepeopleevents

No one

          No one but me


I’m not what I was

nor wanted to be

not happy not sad

not bandaged not free

not one in a million

not one of the crowd

not quiet

not silent

nor particularly loud


I’m not one of them

and I’m not one of those

I’m not into fashion

but I do wear their clothes

my looks are quite normal

for those who can see

though shorter ...

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In my dream I listen to the best of Heart, Ann Wilson really rocking out. Who'll You Run To? and All I Wanna Do reminding me of my dear ex wife. Why do I dream of her? Is it to show me I have nothing now? No wife, no family, no house, no car, no job and no happiness? I can't describe how it affected me at 6am in the morning. A mental block provided by an angel protects me ...

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heartheavy rockann wilsonmeex wifemarriagedreammemories





Time stands still in a front room in early ’95.

The telly is on but the sound is off,

All About Eve plays on the stereo,

soft vocal tones and powerful guitar.

The clock says a time but that doesn’t matter

as here it is timeless.

Bev drinks a glass of wine

while I have the rest of the bottle

and a full bottle of Thunderbirds.


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roomhouseromancewinetvmeex wife





Come and get me, show me the insides of my body, what makes me tick…

Cut out my heart and show it beating to me before my very eyes,

remove my brain and cut my belly put inside – funny weight problem!

Cut my hands off and toast my fingers, eat them snitzels

in gravy made from skin on my back.

Put my tattoos on a lampshade to preserve my body art,


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meseperate to piecestaken apart





It’s hard to leave you all behind

all those times we laughed together,

once my friends but now no more.

All the special girls gone for good,

“Yes I’ll love you forever more”—

now just an aching memory.

Where are they now?

Do they think of me or block me out?

If only I could say sorry to those I’ve hurt,

turn the cloc...

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We, the generation of the damned, the lost ones,

the weird ones, the ones you stare at and misunderstand,

as a joke I say Hiroshima was good, let’s do it again!

Do you think I’m mad? I say a man is to be judged

on his actions, not on his memories, wise words for me.

Why are we like this? I have my own answers and know

I’m lucky, I have my music...

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hmmm is this about me...





All he ever wanted to do was to improve his life, make a better life for himself and not be a lazy freeloader. Certain people thought he'd never make it; this view rubbed off on him through time and really depressed him. He was determined to show them they were wrong, that he wasn't lazy and could prove something to first himself, then them and finally the world.


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In the belly of the beast, dwelling within where the monster can't get to me, I'm safe for now. Will the beast stir and sense me inside? Find me and pull me out of his gut? Am I Jonah inside the whale? Safe or ask risk? Time will tell. Thinking I'm going to be free when I'm out there in the world, my world keeps ...

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