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alone

I have this indescribable need to be heard,

like I’ve never whispered a single word over the course of my life,

like I’ve never uttered an incoherent syllable under the light of the dying sun,

like I’ve never looked into the eyes of another and truly felt seen. 

 

Am I alone? 

 

Am I floating here, lost in the waves of a turbulent sea,

waiting for a lifeboat that will never...

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lonelyalonedepressionautismocdmental healthconnectionhumanity

Connected

In the noise of the city,
where faces merge with cold screens,
we live in an era of empty echoes
and weary of shouting into the void.

The streets are labyrinths of concrete and glass,
distorted reflections of fragmented dreams,
and advertisements blink like empty promises,
poisoning the mind with unfulfilled desires.

We live in an era of illusory connection,
where smiles are posted an...

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computerinternetconnectiontelephonecell phonedigitalmelancholy

Previous skins

Five years ago flew by

Now, already remote

The rolling of the years

They’re already afloat

Your past self

Already a ghost

 

When you stand still

You begin to grieve your previous skins

Wonder why you had to forget and kill

Old personalities just to multiply new

So, you cling on to specific moments

Promise not to forget, you never will

 

But it is not uniqu...

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memorylifepresentpastfuturetensesjourneyagingnaturelivespreviouspast liferememberidentitybrainconnectionmemory lossforgetrebirthmomentghostyearsmeaninglet gohold on

Soulmates?

Soulmates. 

Do souls exist?

If they do 

I believe ours belong together.

I love u 

I know that know. 

Even after 5 years 

I still do

I will never stop.

I pray 

at night 

for this one moment 

this one second 

with you 

being able to tell you

how i feel. 

Then 

I couldn’t.

Last time I saw you

I nearly told you.

Back then 

I was with him.

...

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soulmateslovesoulsconnection

Running

Have you ever stopped to ask why do I run

Ironically its only when you stop the mind runs wild

We run to be fit

We run to be social

We run to be healthy

But is it always healthy to run

I run for a different life I cannot have

I run Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday

My love runs Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday

I started so I could support her

To let her know I was with her eve...

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loveromanceconnectionlonelinesslosspain

Three dots

Three dots bounce with so much meaning

She is still there

We are connected once again 

The light is green 

For a moment we are back

But as quick as it comes it must go

Holding onto the green till the last moment

But must it go

Are the dots a pause

Till we are ready to reconnect

Are the dots hiding the sinister end

Or are the dots hiding the life we could have

Th...

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loveromanceconnectionlonelinesslosspain

Wrestled to girl

I wrestled you down

Girl

Into woman

I grew your thoughts for you

Lifeless of the party

Monotone 

You vacuum expression

And drain me,

Exhausted

Stop

I gave you emotions

Give me energy

Any kind just give

Give and give 

I must drink

Always thirsty am I

But I drink for you

So what’s this lull in your throat

Dip in your tone

Crack? 

No

You ...

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Wrestlefightabusemanipulatetoxictriggertraumabondconnectioninterdependentcontrolobsessnarcissistsociopathrelationshipheart breakhealbreak uplearnreflectself awaregrowpainrealisegaslightliarcomplicatedmonologuecharacterpartneremotional abuse

I Write In Pen

Expressions of Love: Part XLIII

Title: I Write In Pen

 

I write in pen.

Because, like our relationship,

It is final.

There is no going back,

only forward; ink building

and growing like our connection,

every single day.

 

-Jaxy

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loveloversconnection

For ASCGDF:K

after For M by Mikko Harvey

 

I didn't expect you to leave

red paint on my heart. 

Have you ever spoken

without the timbre of your gaze

turning words into molasses?

Well, if not, I think you should try. 

Follow my lead:

Emotion tied to twisted words and Pokemon is an odd combination.

I hope you know the melody of my laughter will be found in those words.

Sometimes,...

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See Her

When she folded into herself

You all looked away

When she unraveled

You all watched

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Truth

July 2020

Find your vibe
Look for your tribe 
Listen with intention 
And learn the lessons that the universe wants to tell you 

Open your eyes 
The one in your mind 
Look for the truth 
It's all around

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existentialismconnection

My trauma sees your trauma

My trauma sees your trauma

 

We are only skin deep

While we don't know the heavy stuff about each other

One stranger to another stranger

To cross that line

Can bring connection 

But with that, vulnerability and perceived danger

 

I want to take that step with you

But I'm afraid of what it might stir up

It may bring us closer together

Albeit, it might just trigge...

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connectionemotiontraumaunderstandingvulnerability

Best Friend

On my darkest days you have been my light

You have helped me to shine bright 

Always telling me that I belong

Always reminding me that I am enough

When my heart it blue

You are my glue

Nothing can describe the bond between me and you

You always see me through

Thank you for being my best friend, my sister, and simply you 

 

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best friendlovesisterconnectionbondhappinesslightshinebright

Oh, Little Bird

Oh, little bird
When winter comes and you are gone
Chasing the sun,

When snow has fallen and the icy air
Threatens to freeze our bones,

I shall think of you
On your wild adventure
Until my heart beats as fast as your wings
And we are both warm.
 

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meditationconnectioncomfortpower of mind

Entirety (The Whole)

The sights of ourselves still shape us to divide,
immediate response to the craves and madness,
we feel the way we feel but tonight it's you inside,
burried in the senses out of the lightness.

And days are still days but the trouble collides,
for all the reasons we chose not to revile,
and all our fears, childlish alike,
echoing through our minds, rejecting denial.

Stay where you are a...

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poetrysad poetrylove poetryconnectionwritingwriting poetry

A Part

My bed is still warm

When the next body rolls in

But I'm not

I'm numb

Until,

Your body

- Or his -

- Or hers -

Envelopes mine

And I can breathe

Because

I am consumed

I am part of you,

Of someone that lives

That moves

That loves

I am

I was

I will be

Because I'm not apart

Just a part

Of something

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aparta partpersonhumanconnectedbecomingnumbsexcopingcoping mechanismdetachedremoveddepersonalizationconnectionphysicalintimateusingaddictiondepression

Daughter

Forgive me, for not 
being the mother 
you needed me to be.

For being too busy,
too naive to see 
what was happening 
in front of me.

For being silent
when your father 
screamed and demeaned.

For when I thought it
was sweet that your 
boyfriend carried you
to your room when you 
"fell asleep".

For not enough hugs
and too many lectures.

For not seeing the signs
of addict...

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addictionconnectiondaughterfaithforgivenessfamilyhealinghellhero's journeyloverecoveryrelationships

It's a Miracle, I Tell You

The staccato rain on the roof

The sudden parting of clouds

 

The silent worship of morning

The kettle's steamy clicking on the stove

 

The stellar jay defending the nest

The gang of crows flying off

 

The 100 bones of feet

The climbing of mountains

 

The slenderness of throat

The fullness of hymns on Sunday

 

The meeting of you

The knowing of me

 

...

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lovemiracleconnectioncollection

Cha-Chi Legacy

I inhale the tears 
welling up in my eyes.
Feeling like I don't have 
the right to cry for 

letting so much time go by
without saying hi,
how are you doing, 
what's new in your life?

I "kept in touch" 
watching your 
adventures
on social media, 

restoring 
power
after a 
hurricane, 

providing water 
and food for 
people who didn't 
know your name.

I was proud of you,
...

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connectiondeathfamilyhomelesslegacylifelovesocial mediatimevolunteer

Forever

Forever ago may seem 
like 20 years of gray,
but I live forever every day.

There is no escape.

It's not the passion I miss,
I keep that memory sealed 
in a concrete kiss.

It's the lyrical 
soul connection
that went on months

before our egos
got in the way. 

In the forever between
tears and heartbreak, 

we managed 
to find ourselves 

and our destiny, here 
on this pag...

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connectiondestinyforeverheartbreakkissesmusepassionpoetrypoetsstar-crossed loveTearstime

Writer's Block

When you get writer's block
go for a walk

find a friend 
have a talk

blow bubbles
spin a top

count stars
watch birds flock

whatever you do 

don't stare 
at a blank page

as the clock
goes tick-tock. 
 

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Connections

I know you don't 
want to think of me.

I don't want to 
think of you either.

But the more I resist, 
the more your ghost 
persists. 

It makes no sense.

Hardly a day goes

by that you don’t  
cross my mind.

Some days 
it infuriates me
that someone who 
pushed me over the cliff 

of obscurity

has a choke hold 
on my soul.

Other days 
I accept
what I cannot 
compr...

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affairconnectioneternityExesGhostsloverelationshipssoulmatetwin flames

Tell Me

Tell Me

 

Tell me, Stranger, tell me do,

What makes the world spin round for you?

What do you love, what makes you cry?

What do you hope, before you die?

 

Tell me, Father, plant a seed,

What path I follow, where you lead,

Give me compass, strength and plan,

To show me how to be a man.

 

Hold me Mother, sing me songs,

Give me rites for all my wrongs,

You g...

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connectiondeathlifelovereligion

Only Connect

Only Connect

 

We don’t want to be alone…

 

But our deepest relationship is with our phone

Like a dog with a bone, checking the tone.

We swipe and we flick,, we tick and we post,

Poking, retweeting, who likes us the most?

We turn on the roast, we like and give stars,

But end of the day, do we know who we are?

 

This ain’t how it could be,

It’s wrong, do you see?

...

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connectionlifelovephonestechnology

Chaos

She swims the deep blue,

chaos in her heart,

mind a bright spark,

words that shine a light afar.

A fire burning in her soul

as she does not yet know

she's already whole.

 

Deep as the deepest sea

the deep of her words

speaks to me.

Can't see the forest

for the trees

when I hear her read.

 

Her voice,

it does

such beautiful things

and I get lost

...

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connection

Connections

I like the moment when my hand
opens up a window to the unknown

polar winds, a vintage of lifetimes and stories,
now caressing my combusting skin.

For an instant, we are sand: constrained and
docile to the invisibility of our surroundings.

A neon moon brings me in touch with my
most primitive instincts: claiming ownership of

the next wrong step and a turn that is a s...

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connectiondance

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