Some years ago, I realised

I am the driver of my life

And so I chose light

It was a difficult decision

More difficult than it sounds

It’s hard to know what it is to see

When there’s no darkness around

It’s easy to equate pain with feeling

To attach pain to being 

And so I never ran from the dark

I marched towards it

Let it smoke my heart

Instead, it was alw...

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Perspective
it was all matter of
perspective

walking 
always on the same side
always the same

today I crossed 
to the other side
and it was different 

I observed the wall,
the street, everything
even the sky was different 

It was the same street,
and i understood:
it was all matter of perspective.

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I tried beautiful,

I tried pristine,

I was no good at it

I’m not neat within

I’m not “clean”

Even externally, I cannot master

Clearing every bit of clutter

I’m raw, like an egg

It’s not pretty to have a cracked head

But if I don’t

I’m practically dead

As inanimate and detached as my wooden bed

To be raw is

Painful,

Ugly,

Messy,

But it’s rich with fee...

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The Bottle

Sometimes it's easy to take comfort from a bottle

Trying to numb or dull the anxiety

A swill of sweet oakey booze to dissolve those feelings one would rather ignore

But eventually, given enough time, and enough drink

One starts to notice that bottle isn't your friend 

It doesn't work

It doesn't numb anything

In fact, most of the time, it boils and churns up and c...

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Blame

I blame my parents

Their fears made me lame.

There were no rooms for mistakes  

Today I am a perfectionist,

An Idealist of every aspects

I blame my parents

For the OCD, today chaos frightens me.

Beliefs shoved down my throat.

For all my insecurities about relationships,

Today I chase what I can’t have.

For the lecture instead of advice,

Today any cr...

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The only thing I knew was pain,
And you showed me what love was.
All I had experienced was crude desire,
And you wanted me like no-one else
Ever had.
I'd burnt my faith,
And then the ashes of my faith, away.
And still it felt safe to believe you.
Any sadness I had,
I know was only brought with me.
It was my only possession, still,
You convinced me to throw it away.
How did those arms, ...

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A droplet rolling down a leaf,

a ray of sunshine lighting the way,

rain clouds coating the sky in gray,

all of it beautiful beyond belief.

In the distance a drawn out howl,

the night gives all a nocturnal cowl,

hiding in the shadows,

a quiet danger grows,

waiting for an opportunity,

a made-up monstrosity.

Both begin in an eerie forest,

it all depends on t...

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I can think some portions of the image,
But the words don't exist,
This fear that can't be said.

Strange,
How the thought can freeze the body,
And not the body the thought.
And any communication describes nothing.

I can say some things that I think,
But others make me mute.
This barrier in my head,
Even I can't cross.

It is like painting a face a single shade of pink.
Like drawin...

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You lock me in a room with no weapons
                                  To fight the waiting lion.
I'd built a hasty tower of chairs
To reach the window,

You could have pulled me out
But you pushed me back
                                        Saying,
                 "Find a ladder to reach this window."

And you wondered why I was clinging.

Then you pulled the chairs out
  and s...

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Just because I've learnt to swim underwater,
Doesn't mean I can live without breathing.
Just because I can walk on the surface,
Doesn't mean I can't slip and start sinking.

If I don't look in the mirror,
Doesn't mean my face has changed.
If I start at the beginning,
Still I have to reach the end.

Just because there is a meaning
Doesn't mean I understand (or know it).
Just because the...

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We don't think you ought to do that.
               "Tell me what to do!"
We don't think you should feel like that.
               "Tell me what to feel!"
You should know that there's always a way forward.
               "Show me where to go!"
You should be stronger than that.
               "Show me how."

We've decided you can cope if you try.
               "You don't know what it's l...

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The sun doesn't know that I'm different
The sun doesn't notice I'm here
The air doesn't know that I'm special
The air doesn't care that I'm there
The moon glows on me just the same
The moon doesn't care who I am
And time has never stopped for anyone
Since time began.

No, my dust won't be any different
Than dust has ever been
My bones won't seem more magnificent
Than bones have ever se...

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Whatever I have done 
I might have done worse, and might have done better.
Whatever I have chosen 
I might have chosen worse, and might have chosen better.

Whatever I have tried to say, 
I might have said worse, and might have said better.
Whatever I might be, 
I might have been worse, and might have been better.

But maybe judgement at all isn’t necessary
For better or worse, perhaps ...

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Oh you are stranded on a mountain
you are deep down in a cave
you are in a burning building
you are threatened by big waves

There's a hurricane surrounding
The earth is quaking underfoot
you're marooned and you are drowning
you are in amongst the wolves

And you are paralysed and voiceless
you're exhausted and in shock
you're bewildered and defeated
you are hopeless and you're lost

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I stood beneath a whispering tree
Upon a windy day
Singing into the careless breeze
My cares they blew away.
Then finally I clearly heard
What nature did avow
And I could see the sun at last
Beyond the leafy boughs.

Yes, finally I clearly hear
What nature does avow
And I can see the sun at last
Beyond the leafy boughs.

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Don't we all see our speciality
as the central truth?
My sister, the mathematician, thinks the world
is ruled by numbers
and defined by them.
She would say that without maths
the world is nothing
then start to prove it.

The medic or the tailor
the banker or the lawyer
the chef or farmer
all
the centre of the universe,
but most of all
I think
the poet.

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Thirty thousand times around the world
I'll go thirty thousand times around the world,
Give or take a few, 
But what will I do, 
While I go thirty thousand times around the world?

I've gone around the world before,
At least ten thousand times or more,
All because the Earth is in a spin.
But between me and you, what will I do,
While I go thirty thousand times around the world?

Oh!... ...

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I pity you for the worldview you have acquired.
I pity you for the hurt you have suffered.
I pity you for the opportunities you have squandered.
And I pity you the friendships that have foundered.

I pity you for the fear that propels you.
I pity you for the decisions that shape you.
I pity you the isolation that awaits you.
And I pity you the path actions take you.

I pity you who canno...

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Living beneath the wind,
How easy it is not to reach for the stars.
But sleeping beneath the moon,
How can we not yearn?

Touched by infinity,
Where do we place the next step?
Conscious of eternity,
We must ever go on.

In all of this grandeur, I should feel so small.
Soaking it into every pore,
I wonder.

In all this variety, I must seem so dull.
Watching the intricacy,
I learn.

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A dip in the sand caught a pool of sea,
When the tide came in and went out again.
The pool of sea caught a ray of sun,
And it seemed like a star had been caught on Earth,
But a moment later all was gone.

A child ran forward to see what it was,
That shone so brightly from out of the dirt.
Little feet,
Kicking up sand,
Ran themselves through a dip in the ground.
And it seemed like the je...

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One last blow out. 

One last crucial hit.

A delightful dream which is

way out of the desired grip.

Every repetition of this addictive action

Every summon to this predicted slip.

Each time over and over again

Causes our precious belief to slowly rip.

The belief is to quit and seek much further beyond.

The truth that we desire of which we have oh so longed.

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'Mirror mirror on the wall,
Who is the ugliest of them all'.
Hearing the answer gotten so sad,
For the looks of it, he was not so bad.
Seeing himself ugly in every face,
But it was just his perception not the case.
Thinking of this day and night,
Forgetting the beauty was not in the face but inside.

Again giving himself a chance, he gathered courage.
Asking one more question, like a sag...

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Sell Me Something More Than Snake Oil And Lies

They say that pulling down statues

Is rewriting history

As though the sculptors who made them

Were historians

And not some commissioned artist

Doing what he was told

Sell me something more than snake oil and lies

It is a form of history

Cast in the wealthy viewpoint

From the stance of the privileged

It’s...

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Two toads sitting on a log

One toad pushes the other in

and chuckles to himself

that he always wins

The second toad surfaces 

with a satisfied smile

happy to be in the water

where he’d craved to be

all the while

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Porcelain doll, why are you frowning?

She said, "I am you", "Look at my damage, all the drugs you're downing"

Cracked and peeling, there's no reverse.

She started crying, "Are you going to stop now or make it worse?"

Porcelain doll, how do I stop?

She said, "That's on you."

I take another pill and I hear a pop.

Piece after piece falls on the floor.

She cries out as it hurts...

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How easy it is to judge 

from the throne of 

self-righteousness. 

How comforting to

cast off what 

doesn't fit our

moral code.

Perspective is 

colored by our own 

evolution and lingering 

insecurities.  

The soul of a scribe

cannot help but 

share truths

that set spirits

free, no matter 

the cost of their 

own liberty. 
 

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You do not exist anymore 

Scientifically speaking, 

You are absolutely nothing 

Unconscious, intangible, not there. 

You exist in my mind, 

Poetically speaking, 

You live on through that funny anecdote

Or recipe, your legacy, our memory.  

You are my tragic backstory, 

Therapeutically speaking, 

The key to solving why I am the way I am 

What you made me w...

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