moving on (Remove filter)
april showers bring may flowers
I tried to wait,
But new flowers grow where the old ones die,
I didn’t want to move on,
But the sun involuntarily started to shine,
I lost myself searching for you,
But the fire eventually went out,
The dark smoke turned into wind,
I no longer needed to dwell on my feelings within,
New flowers grow where the old ones die,
Even if the soil needs to cry
Something beautiful can still arise
Tuesday 2nd April 2024 5:02 pm
What's Left Of Love
Too many nights, too many times
I've woke in sweat and had to find
a way to push you out again,
and pray once more that this will end.
That from my heart you'll finally leave
and not come back into my dreams.
For I am old enough to know
the years have made our love run cold.
And I am wise enough to see…
I only love your memory.
Thursday 21st March 2024 1:25 am
At The Ledge
Each time before when I had fallen, landing in the pit below,
I found upon the ground were words that I could gather up to build
a latticework of scaffolding to climb upon so I could go
back to the surface with the crowd, but every time I found that still
I’d stay close to the ledge not knowing why I didn’t walk away.
I told myself it wasn’t wise. I asked, “why don’t you ever l...
Wednesday 21st February 2024 2:55 am
I thank you for not being good enough
You pulled me into your orbit
when I needed your help
and so, I made you my centre
to centre myself
That was my first mistake
I looked inside you
for places where I could hide
I hoped to run from reality
into the delusions of your mind
I was happy to believe you were one of a kind
chuffed upon chuffed that you were mine
and I felt adored
grateful to m...
Friday 28th April 2023 11:54 pm
RIVER
I design my flow of life in my own way
Never built regrets;
Only keep on building memories!!!
Made my way through hard rocks enduring all the pain;
But still enjoy my tracks!!!
'll seem quite and beautiful,
'll reflect what you desire;
Don't dare to test my threshold,
Or else 'll sweep out all the darkness around!!!
You help me carve and pave new path
Helped me see the world in dif...
Tuesday 13th September 2022 4:26 pm
It’s hidden well, but I search deep within the crevices of your mind.
I interpret your words and actions to depict intention and longing, want and need.
They’re masked behind masculinity; hidden within the social construct that disallows you to be free....to feel.
That which praises to the appeal of lust; turns love to dust.
Strong enough to break a woman’s heart, but no strength to trust us.
Friday 1st October 2021 1:58 pm
When His Words Become Hands
His words could become sharp as corners
And trap you there
Flailing in his grasp
They could pinch your skin
Until you cried
And cried
Throughout your shifts
They could catch your wrists and stop you
From moving on
From moving
They could lock the doors, no leaving
They could shame you and shrink you
They could come flying in from an open window,
A buzzing phon...
Monday 8th March 2021 7:27 pm
The Tide Will Come Out Of Your Mouth
SMASH!
Every time the glass of your skull
Crashes into the fist of another memory
To crush you where you stand
Because another memory has broken you
Because another memory has entered you
Like intruders, they force their way inside
They punch their way into your attention
They invade your heart
Until you must look at them
All so that they can violate you again
They...
Tuesday 23rd February 2021 6:29 pm
Speak for the Trees
tears fall from the tips of leaves,
no longer heaving but finally at peace,
no longer a place for relief,
no longer bending to the constant breeze,
no longer kept afloat meandering rivers,
no longer subject to raging fires,
no longer a victim to defeat.
tides no longer pulling at the heart,
stars no longer hovering above,
no longer tormented to be part of the world
that casts...
Tuesday 10th November 2020 2:07 am
Why Would You Do That?
I’ve got callouses
I’m covered in scars
I’m broken inside
So loving me is hard
You kissed my fingers
My heart pounded so hard
You bathed me in love
And now i can’t get up my guard
It just seems so easy for you
Even after all we’ve been through
You told me you didn’t want to lose me
So how are you being so cold
You washed away the armour that i hold
I wish that this hurt you like i...
Saturday 11th July 2020 7:05 am
Revolving Door
He says, “you’ve been a great lover,
opened up doors for me,
been there when I needed you
but I’m going to leave you, woman
for I know you could do better than me”
He picks up his suitcase,
then he’s running out the door
And that’s the way it is
that’s the way it’ll always be
lovers in and out the revolving door
She says, “I’m going to leave this town
s...
Tuesday 5th May 2020 5:24 am
What is next?
What is next? I ask God
Tell me please because I feel so lost
Losing control of all that is around
What is next? I ask God
Then a small voice howls in the wind saying, "Worry about now!"
Smile, Breathe, Relax
Don't worry about the future nor the past
Wednesday 5th February 2020 5:41 pm
Mementos
One by one counting memories:
an old photograph of us at the beach,
a sweater that won’t rid itself of your scent,
books and CDs that you lent,
I’ve packed them away
They won’t see another day
I’ve packed the boxes,
made the plans,
the rooms are empty
but I am motionless
Is it that familiar look?
Is it the morning glow
that paints itself through the window?
No, it’s the memories ...
Monday 3rd February 2020 6:32 pm
Hyde Park Winter Rink
We circle as sharks
on the Hyde Park winter rink
our eyes like lasers
I audibly bleep when they meet
We both go forwards
not getting anywhere
we pass with differing intervals
I only breathe when we pass
Some laps are flawless
some laps are clumsy
some laps I nearly take some sucker down
some laps I kiss the ice
I feel your eyes lift me to my feet
I feel them brush the slush from...
Friday 13th December 2019 1:49 pm
Shedding Skin
Been living with trouble in mind
trouble of mind, troubling life
with trouble pulled inside
Spent a decade in the shade
spent a decade dealing in shame
a decade; feeling a certain kind of hate
Crawled out into the light
staggered through that blinding light
still I busied myself
with needless slivers of selfish night
Do you want to start again
do you want to make that change
wel...
Monday 9th September 2019 9:36 am
What were they like?
They were the deciding factor
Of a good or bad day
Of whether I was okay
If we were okay
They could change my mood
Stop me in my tracks
Jumble my mind
Blind me from the truth
Like heroin
I was their addict
Ephemeral pleasure
Everlasting poison
By the end
I was weak
Lost
Stripped of all identity
And they appeared
In my dreams
...Saturday 29th September 2018 10:52 pm
Spit of Life
Do you remember how we used to savour the pins and needles on our tongues?
Do you remember how we used to bite into bitterness?
lick the spit of life
I was turned on by brokenness
maybe it’s cliche
that I craved pain
swallowing broken bottles
it's lined my pockets
it's swollen my stomach
Do you remember when we saw ‘sad’ as just another crayon
to colour ourselves in w...
Sunday 1st April 2018 4:06 pm
Broken Bottles
It shattered across the floor
I knew this was coming, it was no surprise
I couldn’t take it anymore
Oh, the fire in his eyes
His hand against my neck
His breath against my cheek
I pulled away hoping not to wreck
Yet his presence felt so meek
The way he talked to me
The way he spat on the ground
The way he grabbed my knee;
It had me all turned around
...
Tuesday 20th March 2018 4:29 am
When I Knew I Deserved Better Than You
the day i faked saying i love you was the day i put myself above you. the day i realized i didn't want you anymore was the day i finally was able to kick you out and bolt lock that door. i don't know what exactly lead me to this point of closure, i think maybe i had just regained my confidence and composure. by you, i was left alone.. your whereabouts most nights were unknown, and you made sure to...
Sunday 11th March 2018 1:55 am
What We Leave Behind (and what we take)
You told me I was worthy of more, but always convinced me to stay
But today
Today I leave our bedroom the way it was left this morning
Cushions and pillows adorning the bed
we chose for this life together
A shared bathroom that won't be shared anymore
Two shelves, one mostly empty
A walk in wardrobe, filled once with fabric that clothed us
Only now it is bare with...
Tuesday 16th May 2017 6:26 pm
Farewell Serpentine
Circling the water
one final evening
I catch sight of my reflection
see those lines forming
writ across my brow
so I roll my head in ink
kiss the page…
Soon, we’ll be quietly leaving
no longer anchored in Zone Two
swaddled by the Thames
for an unknown pause we’re going now
The shapeless mess of time approaches
with me, desperately
clawing at relief lines
to understand what gradient
...
Monday 24th October 2016 6:57 pm
Storm Chasers
Tyre tracks on dirt roads
storm chasers
looking for the eye
or something on the other side
Peddle kisses the floor
world whips past the window
tearing up the old road
headed North, searching for more
We were happy here
(eventually)
but could there be greater happiness
elsewhere
storm is a chorus
always another verse
on the other side…
In some mad way
we’re headed for a great...
Tuesday 7th June 2016 11:24 am
Delicate Love-
Delicate Love
Moving day; a time of excitement, worry and letting go. My baby girl has finished college, married the man of her dreams and is beginning a new chapter in her life. The van left an hour ago and on a whim I went to the attic to make sure she had everything. I glanced around and tucked in the corner the words “china” in girlish writing popped out at me.
...
Tuesday 6th October 2015 10:57 pm
Moving On
Moving On
staring through the window
at that dark and dismal place
where shadows danced and jittered
and a stranger had my face
I was shocked, but not surprised, to find
my future hopes would never last
if I stayed gazing in the mirror
and obsessing with the past
Thursday 28th November 2013 8:36 pm
Tunnels
Tunnelling in the dirt below my feet
I've been digging here all week
carving this hollow so deep
today, I hit bone
This is heavier work than I imagined
surveyed the ground from beyond the fence
And we both agreed that this was right
but now the toil is breaking me apart
As a new day rises
I'm bawling in the shower
never knew I could feel this pain
with the taps turned up to ten
nev...
Tuesday 17th September 2013 10:40 pm
Each Branch I Snap
Thursday 31st January 2013 7:42 am
Gotta Keep On
.
Gotta keep on moving,
keep on travelling...
keep one foot ahead of the other
like a race that has no winner.
Then I shall outrun my tears and leave all my fears
the wind before me, then behind me.
Ridding me of moistness, passed my ears.
Gotta get going, to keep from falling....
keep this foot in front, then the next.
.
Please make you...
Wednesday 9th January 2013 2:27 pm
Pull Apart The Perfect Nest
So then, stick by stick
tonight we tear off strip after strip
the newest feathers first
then the older twigs and vines
with each one
my heart drops
until there's nothing left
and nowhere lower
just empty branches
where our sweet home once was
Inch by inch
we pack and divide the moss
all the soft things we've collected
years of careful, loving selection
pecking them away, each and e...
Monday 26th July 2010 1:08 pm
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