Poetry Blogs (2020, depression)
The light, so fierce and bright,
The glow like warm embers of a fire.
Attracting, magnetic, drawing you in,
Even more obvious from the shadows,
Looking in from the cold darkness
Where the fire once burned
And the warm hand of comfort used to rest.
It's cold out here away from the fireplace,
On the wrong side of the lighthouse,
With a perfectly illuminated view of th...
Saturday 4th July 2020 12:32 pm
I am the one who’s innocent blood was
shattered beneath the golden cross.
I am the one who’s virgin blood
stained the concrete floor.
I am the one who was too weak to fight,
yet too strong to die.
Oh what a fool who transverses the
Hell of man to stand erect with burning vengeance…
and walks away.
I am that fool.
I am the one who fought each night.
Who used her own...
Tuesday 16th June 2020 2:27 am
long have I stood
long stood have I gazed
long gazed have I thought
long thought have I suffered
long suffered have I
long have I stood
Saturday 13th June 2020 1:48 pm
A magenta sky
greets my morning sigh.
Another majestic day,
lost in the minutia of life.
paralyzing dream sabers.
Download another book,
refresh the poet's page.
Escape, behind a waterfall
Dry your eyes,
face your fears.
Tuesday 9th June 2020 4:31 pm
as a recovering suicidal,
things get too much many times a day
as a practicing high school student,
i am in classes 6 hours a day
now i'm failing at algebra, so i'll let you do the math -
but as the test subject, i can confirm
that this lines up to cause quite a few overloads during class
so that's why
that's why i excuse myself
fill up my water bottle, go t...
Tuesday 9th June 2020 1:37 am
~Quietly floating atop the rolling fabric of navy
Blue like the absence of oxygen in the veins
Tracing a trajectory charted and discovered,
Re-charted and rediscovered,
I spend the nights in Neptune.
I find an uneasy peace as daybreak cracks and attacks the ice
But the deep fissures fuse ever stronger.
The ocean lulls my corpus into a drowsy state
As my restless mind rages ...
Saturday 23rd May 2020 9:30 am
A summer's Christmas,
A winter's Easter,
Sun blazed reflections,
Moon chilled features,
Decaying bright shadows,
Renewing dark radiance,
Exogenous void within',
Lagging just to rush,
The constantly inconsistent,
Concealing joyous sorrows,
Being contiguously distant,
Thoughts resistantly flowing,
Nerves electrically static,
Wednesday 20th May 2020 11:20 pm
I can't take it,
I'm only asking,
Please Lord help me,
I'm tired of relapsing,
Over and over,
My veins are collapsing,
I know you hear me,
I'm sorry for babbling,
I don't understand,
Why this keeps happening,
I'm covering the pain,
It's so everlasting,
The hurt burns deep,
It never stops dragging,
Life is a slow death,
It's truly a sad thing,
Sunday 10th May 2020 3:20 pm
Michelangelo said the work of art awaited him beneath the slab of marble, merely for him to uncover it. In my own small way I understand that as I write these days. The poem I know is possible waits patiently at the other side across a murky divide and with luck and patience maybe I can reach it, reveal it.
Here is one I wrote about a barbecue years ago in the small town where I lived.
Friday 8th May 2020 11:43 pm
You paint yourself blue, always blue
this letter brings me down
perched upon a rusty trailer
paint peels over my shoulder
I've been drinking
since the boats were rested
on the muddy estuary bed
It's high tide, low life
high tide, low life
I won't stop my reaching out
if there's any way to help, I'll find it
you're so slow to take my hand
scratching at your skin for answers
Monday 20th April 2020 1:45 pm
It’s a weird feeling.
I try so hard to put on a show
To all of my friends
And my family
I need to be strong.
I don't want pity
I don't want to be a charity case
I’ve always been the person people come to for advice
And I’ve always been there for all my friends
And goddammit, I wish they were there for me
Thursday 9th April 2020 8:27 am
The weight of a thousand suns and a million lives and every single lie told to every single hopeful attached lover/
It’s on this very chest and my ribs are long gone they cracked and left years ago /
So did you and your promises and your hopes to get me better/
So did your patience for a illness without symptom
Because to you //
Symptom is a sore leg/
But to me ...
Wednesday 1st April 2020 11:34 pm
I'm missing my gran
She's my number one fan
I'm missing her chain smoking
The golden oldies she hums to herself so sweet
I'm missing the family anecdotes that make my day complete
I miss her asking me how I'm doing
And is the poetry going alright
I miss her telling me how she won at bingo at the social club
Every Sunday night
I'm missing the person that taught me about Albert and that...
Monday 23rd March 2020 9:41 pm
I don't like your colour,
Can't hear your noise
You cover streets in winter,
Keep my heart there,
In grey lands.
Let rivers overflow
And my heart sinking
Into colourless melancholy.
I want to be
At a sunny place.
I want to feel the golden light
And warmth on my skin.
©️ By Magical whispers
Wednesday 11th March 2020 9:02 am
When sun comes against all odds
And the colours of life just pop
Or when the rain falls
It falls and falls
And you wet your lips
With piping hot tea
With warm biscuit
Savour the crumbs
Cosy and safe
In the arms of a jumper
The padding of the sofa,
Like a huge hug
Or when your face aches,
Your stomach vibrates
Because you are fighting to breathe
Tuesday 18th February 2020 5:52 am
I wish i were braver. More like everything you deserve.
Wouldn't inflict my self on anyone. Nothing more cruel i've always thought.
I can't change the past and there's too much of it.
I see the heart of you, clearer than the things you want me to.
I dont see the rules to the games you play, and don't know why you play them anyway.
Hear this echo fade away, flickering to the tunes you play.
Wednesday 12th February 2020 7:14 am
When people ask me how I'm doing I want to tell them the truth.
That my depression is the captor I can not escape from.
That my heart longs for the attention I don't sustain.
That my ears burn waiting for you to tell me you feel the same.
I want to tell you that depression has invited anxiety over.
Yes... that is the third time this week. Thanks for noticing.
Tuesday 11th February 2020 10:23 pm
For the desperate disparate
All I am
since before i heard the tigerpig, no thought no time
When i stop i am gone
Ever as now
A silent scream rising like the firefawn
Existing only when the wind blows
Moss beneath my toes on the old stones
In sunlight through stained glass
The echo of living through falling lashes
Alive for one timeless moment
Hoping to smell poplars through the pine
Tuesday 11th February 2020 8:59 am
The beach isn't a beach
if it sans the sea
Just a random strip of sand
on a hot summer day
The night doesn't fall
till the sun goes away
for it to dazzle
in its own way
Am I the night
that needs the sun
to mark my presence
or simply the beach
which will be nothing without the sea?
Monday 10th February 2020 11:13 am
I want to feel connected. To anything. Anything at all.
You all belong here i can tell, i see the weave running through you, even the worn and tattered threads.
And i float above and barely touch. It's all too much this not enough.
This pain is real and meaningless, i watch as salt water carves cracks around my eyes with too much to ask and not enough to say
I want your joy, your...
Sunday 9th February 2020 9:58 am
The rain falls
My soul weeps
All the secrets that we keep
Thursday 23rd January 2020 5:02 am
For starters: offense to real, man's best friends dogs. I love them, but also are scared of them in a way. This one is dedicated to the "black dog'" that haunts a lot of people's lives. I did a DJ gig on this day tonight and met a fellow who told me he does a mental health group to protect people who do not talk about what they are and or feel obsessed with or feel suicidal. We bought a few drinks...
Wednesday 22nd January 2020 12:57 am
cant forget all the things that happened, im constantly reminded
tramatizing pictures in my head
the doctors got worried so they put me on some meds
because i couldnt deal with my mental
derailing and my thoughts became detramental
i couldnt handle my life anymore
couldnt stop the impulses before...
it was too late, theres drugs involved, using them i thoug...
Wednesday 15th January 2020 11:26 am
what is it without actually being happy
i put together the most real pieces but it doesnt change my feelings even when theyre clapping
im really just sad but i hide it with anger
my life has never been safe, always putting myself in danger
trying to find salvation, maybe i can save myself
maybe help my momma, get my family in good health
im just tryna stay strong and change my ch...
Wednesday 15th January 2020 10:34 am
Depression is a question
of stamina. We know how to win.
Build walls and fill them with light
even as darkness batters the barricades,
threatening a wholesale invasion. So we turn on more lights,
call more friends, play, dance, and work, work, work.
This isn’t mania,
unless swimming to shore
in a river of white-water rapids is also mania.
and we can make it.
Monday 6th January 2020 10:00 am