its hard to measure a single beating heart
to measure its clawing judgement.
to measure the mothers beating blood while she’s
wrenching, retching and writhing.
its hard to measure disgust,
difficult to seethe while corps-less hearts beat inside you.
its easy to declare a hidden hate,
easy to let it wage a war on a world you don’t understand.
its hard to watch, fallen sisters.
Saturday 28th May 2022 10:23 pm
You are a woman,
The type of woman
who could never
One deserving of
Saturday 30th October 2021 3:47 am
Na jaana maine wo ehsaas jab tak na aya tha tu
Na jaani maine wo khushi jab tak na paayi thi teri rooh
Kuch pal the dard ke lekin sehne me tha ek sukoon
Tere aane ke ehsaas ne badhai tujhse roobaroo hone ki justjoo
Aane se tere aai mujhme ek nayi zindagi
Kya khwaab hai ye ya sach me tu hai is rooh me kahin
Hazaaro darr hai is dil me or sawaal bhi
Magar maloom hai mujhe bas hai jawaab har ...
Monday 17th May 2021 12:24 pm
I miss the way you make brews too weak,
Served up with endless biscuits,
I miss the way the room goes quiet,
When we howl with childish laughter,
I miss stealing words,
Between cries of our children,
Time standing still,
As we ramble through weeks again,
I miss lifting each other up,
Plotting schemes for the future,
'Thank goodness for videocalling'
I say it, it's true,
But oh, how...
Monday 8th February 2021 9:07 pm
Reflections on single-parenthood.
Last Day at School
And you are off,
Floating through our front door,
Awash with make-up,
Dripping with love,
Much taller now,
Towering above me
A figure of strength,
Last day at school
Where are you now?
When you are not with me,
No need for cuddles,
No clinging to my leg,
You won’t remember,...
Saturday 6th February 2021 8:09 pm
small curls so soft
fall in your eyes
wide by surprise
stretch out to me
short pudgy legs
the world is yours
should your heart break
I’ll give you mine
© Candice Reineke 2021
Sunday 17th January 2021 10:47 pm
you cannot shut the whole world off as
and when you please.
i was fifteen
my mother, forty-five, fighting
an incessant war with my headphones.
our days were outlined more with
slammed doors and dour glares,
conversations prisoned behind the fear
of exposing the soft-
ness in the way our hearts beat
or pumped blood
to spill over that much love. our hands
Tuesday 11th February 2020 4:53 am
My wings are brown, not black and shiny.
I'm always peeping out through leaves.
I try and keep above the fear trilling below,
I know they are ingesting bitter roots.
And yet I swallow their song all the same.
The empty smoke of hope that arises,
as I am the Blackbird mother sitting,
gathering material and protecting you,
refined in pointless expectation.
I am a gust of failure that ruins,
Tuesday 18th June 2019 4:00 pm
The day I met you
My soul awoke;
a sound of crying so joyous I could cry myself
The thought of opening my eyes
without the sound this little life I created would be just as scary as it was
when she had opened hers in the first
moments of life
She lit up my night sky
She came to me with golden hair
The color people would dye to have
For her, I'd die a million times to have al...
Tuesday 11th December 2018 2:00 pm
Sometimes it bugs me
to have to chain up my chest
to keep it under control
And a few days each month
I’m afraid to stand up
for fear of disaster below
The price to pay for having a way
to make two little humans
and call them my own
One of whom
will make the same complaints
once she is fully grown.
Friday 14th September 2018 10:28 pm
Lying here comforting my daughter of 9 months beside me, it suddenly occured to me that when she was born I was going to write more, start to share my work, use my time out of work to explore my poetry writing too. You know, all the usual gubbins, before the actual reality of having a newborn who doesn't sleep, has painful reflux and an older, teenage sister or whichever equivalents consume you....
Tuesday 30th May 2017 5:26 am
My mom lives in my heart
Of my world she is a special part
Lots of care and unlimited love
Shes an angel from heaven above
She gives me food and drops me to school
In my life she sets all the rules
Even she scold and yells at me
In her eyes love is what i See
Sometimes i may cause you pain
But i know your darling I will remain
You will always be in my heart
Wednesday 4th January 2017 6:35 pm
Being a mother can be very tough
There are days when I feel all gruff
Every time I feel like that I wish I know
I simply need to relax & go with the flow
Every time my kids make utter mess
I wish I know there are many who suffer from being childless
Every time I see my dreams being fulfilled in their future
I wish I know my job is not to control but to nurture
I wish I remember that they ...
Tuesday 3rd January 2017 8:32 am
Breakfast, dinner, tea-
different food, same dishes;
new water, same sink.
Each day, fresh treasure
Organic, homegrown, straight from
the cat litter tray.
You will never peel
the same potato again.
Alas, more will come.
The sole purpose for
anyone’s toaster’s crumb tray
is to upset them.
Once wine filled this glass,
fairy liquid and r...
Friday 5th August 2016 9:26 am
I have a large knife in my hand
and I’m not afraid
to skin this mother
to sliver away at the
stiff upper lip of a
banish wrinkles, dents and prickly bits
and behold it
cleansed, stripped, unveiled
If you ask me again
I will plainly chop
the thing in two
while I wonder what I could be
This repast, the fourth of the day
mentally diarised between
broken blinds and...
Thursday 22nd October 2015 7:47 pm
They call me your mini me
Strangers mistake us for sisters
Old friends sometimes call me by your name
I have always called you mommy
Except that one year back when youth and innocence clung to my small frame and I decided calling you mom sounded more grown up
I always forgot when I heard the key turn in the lock and you came home from work
I would run into your ar...
Tuesday 7th October 2014 10:42 pm
Composed At Braunau (April 20th 1889)
Earth has not anything to show more fair,
all bloodied here beneath the twisted cross,
than this, my child, my angel of Braunau.
I take him in my arms and simply stare
upon this changeling left within my care.
His birth, today, is surely heaven’s loss
and touches all my greys with rainbow gloss.
The world lies sleeping,...
Wednesday 6th February 2013 8:36 pm
In times of trouble,
they need me.
In times of peace,
they can't stand me.
In times of trouble,
they say, "I love
In times of peace,
they would rather die
than admit this.
In times of trouble,
they come to me
In times of peace
Tuesday 7th February 2012 7:44 pm