They call me your mini me

Strangers mistake us for sisters

Old friends sometimes call me by your name

 

I have always called you mommy

Except that one year back when youth and innocence clung to my small frame and I decided calling you mom sounded more grown up

 Alas,

 I always forgot when I heard the key turn in the lock and you came home from work

I would run into your arms

Squeeze you tight and kiss your cheek as if I hadn't seen you in a year when in fact you hugged me goodbye on my way to bus stop that very morning

 

You have always been home to me

I pray for you daily,

Long for those days I could lay my head in your lap as we watched tv together

Sometimes I envy little kids

Still young enough to live at home

Still blind to the realities of the world

They see nothing past the smile their mama gives them when things get a little confusing

Fear nothing more than their mama's tears

Want nothing more than their mama's laugh

I miss how simple life was

 

Am awed by how much you loved and sacrificed for me

Understand you in a way we both thought would be a long time coming

But it is coming

And I question if I have your strength

Wonder if i have your endurance

Hope that I learned more from you than either of us thought possible

 

Cuz soon,

I'll have my own mini me

Have someone whose life is worth more than my own

Whose happiness, will be more precious to me than any jewel on earth

Who I love, more than I thought I ever could

And I'm scared

 

That she'll be just like me

And I'm scared

That she'll be nothing like me

And I hope

That I can show her only my smile,

And none of my pain

Because I want to be her to feel safe,

In her home

Like I always have