Nicola Beckett on d.knape
9 hours ago
If you find yourself applying for a soul destroying job maybe...
A job's just come through
From Monsters UK
It's Halloween soon
Woman or man
Bring in your CV
Be it real
Be it fake
These Evil hearts
Saturday 5th October 2019 12:16 pm
Around the world
In 80 websites
Cutting the costs
On all those
& the rucksack
No more clothes
To un pack
I'm minding my
It's just a
Friday 4th October 2019 8:26 pm
It's hard to live a making, hard, hard to make a living
even without the exorcist interferes. I've been a fog
harmer, a hog harmer. I have hogged farms all my life
and my father's life before that. I'm so mad I can't talk right
and the priest will probably say I'm witch crafted too.
I've already paid the lawyer more than the pork
is worth. The lawyers available to represent ...
Thursday 25th April 2019 9:37 pm
Does a lie has feet or walk
Only liars have more than two
Don't listen to a lie as a joke
Then will help lies to grow
God will ask; why do you lie?
So get ready for God's punishment.
Me, you, them, surely will die
Should keep ready for last statement
Get back soon to the early pureness
And stop cheating creatures
Just in case you look for happiness
Wednesday 27th February 2019 1:03 pm
When will the company payout?
Just like Catch 22
All the benefits come after death
You sign on the line
And pay the cash
For the listed benefits
But you don’t see them
Not a single f*cking one
They’re left to your loved ones
Don’t have a wife or kids?
Too bad then
Uncle Sam will claim your benefits
To enrich his war chest...
Saturday 14th April 2018 8:43 am
Bad joke number one. At first a whimsical gesture, a throw away comment, nought but the larks song to win your attention.
Bad joke number two. The brush off, the guise, nothing more than a vulnerable boy hiding behind his painted face as he clutches at a pumpkin bucket, barely able to lift his gaze as he utters meek words, mouthing "Trick,or treat?"
Bad joke number three. Confidenc...
Monday 13th November 2017 12:44 am
How to tell a joke
-Advice given to a Lady-
PREAMBLE- Know your audience Know your subject
PREPARATION: WRITE out your joke in full, read it aloud many times.
REMOVE all diversions, inconsequential and trivial.
CHECK for confused references.
ENSURE you have a command of the required terminology.
DO Laugh at other people's jokes before attem...
Friday 3rd February 2017 4:34 pm
The light at the end of the never-ending tunnel.
The worlds way of fueling us with counterfeit hope.
The missing pieces of the saddest ever puzzle.
The forgotten punchline of a humorless joke.
The untied shoelace that causes a slip and stumble.
The handful of cheap whiskey and the line of coke.
The meaningful words hidden deep inside a mumble. ...
Friday 14th October 2016 6:12 am
Each day I starve
is another day closer to death.
Each day that i'm not loved
is another day i realize
that i am not worthy.
And each day that I'm ignored by others
is another day that I'd rather be dead
than suffering in pain.
Because as I've become
this wandering offspring,
I've become to be invisible
to you and all others.
Cause can't you see
that my light brown hair
has become gr...
Wednesday 22nd October 2014 2:45 am
Aissur Teivos ni,
even the punchline is backwards.
Thursday 17th January 2013 2:44 pm
when I am wounded.
I am quite salted and not a crud.
- Now I understand your point of view.
Looking at you a picture I drew:
You always wear the brown trousers
for not having any moral traumas.
Saturday 7th January 2012 7:07 pm
It was a dirty old day, just a stop on the way
In the sleet and the fog and the rain,
Jams and diversions and unplanned excursions
And drivers with speed on the brain.
When well before noon in the old greasy spoon
Somewhere just off the M one,
(It had seen better days with a jukebox that plays
old ballads from artists long gone.)
In the corner sat Fred, with his cap...
Sunday 18th January 2009 5:26 pm