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Bereft of feeling.

I wanted to do a poem today to provoke a thought or thinking about the insanity of taking drugs. I have known many people succumb to Heroin and painkillers, alcohol and it all seems so futile I myself suffered with addiction through mental illness. Its a terrible thing and very dark. So here is my attempt at describing this disease.

 

Bereft of feeling


Stare into the abyss
eyes burning...

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addictiondrugsMental illnesspainpoem

HELP!!

entry picture

 

 

 

 

Is it a Curse .. or God's Grace 
To live alone heart and place 
Suffering what I always face 
Hopeless to be myself again 

 


Are these changes good for me 
To be lonely always or not to be 
To live away of what I see 
I lost my hope and brain 

 


Sadly to wake up and sleep 
Painful to feel yourself cheap 
Living alone hurts in deep 
I wish to know why, but in va...

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againalonealwaysawaybenazouzbrainchangecheapcursedeepfacefeelGodGoodGraceheartHelphopehopelesshurtknowlivelonelylostmyselfpainplacesadseesleepsuffervainwakewish

Show Me Your Teeth

I wish your body was mine.

I long for our souls to be tangled.

All I crave is connection.

All I seek is approval.

Our savagery is forever,

The killing of time itself.

All I can afford is hope,

But that’ll never be enough.

Take me away from the light

And show me your teeth.

I’ll always be weak to your desires.

So take out your frustrations on me

And leave this pi...

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happylovepainsadteeth

I’m Out of Dreams

I can see your eyes when I close mine.

I can feel your panic when you see my lips move.

I don’t want this. Please.

I’ll push everything into a corner, where it’ll stay, and it’ll only be graced by a glance.

I’m going to push you away.

Expect it.

Crave it.

Let it nourish every fucking negative idea you’ve every had of me.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I have nothin...

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happylovepainsad

Sunder

As libations enter my heart,

I feel nothing but cold dark space.

When I think of where we are now,

All I see is a tenantless void.

The only thing I crave is a thought;

Just a simple acknowledgement.

All I want is the hope that you’ll give yourself to me.

So prey upon my flesh

And consume it for your pleasure.

All I want is to wander

In this wonderland of hate.

I ne...

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eternalhatehopelovepainsorrowvoid

Memories

Sometimes I find myself in a place

where you and I were once

together and I am overcome

by the memories of what

we once were.

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heartbreaklovememoriespain

I thought....

I swear I miss u 
I even wrote a Boone about u 
In 2016 I was willing to die bout u 
It was a high even when I lye next to u 
I swear I would lie for u 
Babygirl yo love was strong 
I knew you’ll die for me 
I’m depressed ,I’m back drinking 
I know you probably like 
“Wtf is he thinking” 
But when I’m drunk i just be pacing 
When I’m high I be contemplating 
I wish the love would’ve la...

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DiesloveloverPain

Of Flesh

Her skin can open up like a mouth

It can speak

When it parts

It can extend like a tongue

It can taste

 

Your arteries are seams

Try to unpeel them

Slip off your flesh

Undress

Search your pores

For secret trap doors

Let the inside out

Part it like a mouth

 

Like hers

It can speak

Unfold the red carpets

Of rolled and folded tongue

Let it searc...

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connectdepressionlovepainreaching outself harmspeaking outsupportunderstanding

I will be your moon

Let me move to a new place,
Where none knows my name,
And I know they will  start judging,
As Everyone is just the same.
But till then ,
Let me find a new love, 
New memories to let go my pain,
You can take my hand,
And please ask me to dance in the rain.
I know our love would break,
Just like all other affairs I had,
Some would say I had no brains, 
And I am the reason you are sad,
B...

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boysheartheartbreaklifelovelovestorymistakesMoonpainplacesun

Aftermath

entry picture

I attempted suicide,

But I didn't die,

Not losing my life,

But what it means to be alive.

I'm drained of all motivation to continue,

But also of all strength to follow through,

I shouldn't be here,

It hurts, but it's true.

My days feel so long,

My existence feels so wrong,

I can't look at life the same,

Because I simply don't belong.

I can't be happy,

Or even...

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deathdepressionhopelesslifepainsuicidesuicide attempt

Too Late

entry picture

You didn't say it back,

But I can't take it back.

 

-tae

 

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emotional painheartbreaklifepain

All alone

Today I learnt to cry alone,

Soon I’ll learn to live alone too..

 

Walking through the grass

Running on the fields

Climbing the mountains

You were always a shield...

 

Never imagined a life without you,

Neither in dreams we were away,

In laughter in tears I was with you,

I was with you each night each day,

 

From feeling of hope to thought to love,

Each da...

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break upheartbreaklovepain

I saw my future before my eyes for the first time in my life 
It wasnt just ideas but plans with who I 
pictured my wife 
The mother of my children and my partner 
through strife

But I lost it 

It was almost here and gone in a moment
It felt so good but now there's pain and I 
ow it 
Started to slip away so I desperately tried 
to hold it 

But now it's gone 

Was it my fault? I'...

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heart breakhopeLovemarriagemiserypainself worthseparation

A Fine Line between Living and Death

You do not exist anymore 

Scientifically speaking, 

You are absolutely nothing 

Unconscious, intangible, not there. 

 

You exist in my mind, 

Poetically speaking, 

You live on through that funny anecdote

That recipe, that legacy, our memory.  

 

You are my tragic backstory, 

Therapeutically speaking, 

The key to solving why I am the way I am 

What you made me...

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deathearly deathfamilyfamilylossgriefGrievinglifelife after deathlife and deathLost familypainperspective

Battlegrounds of the Heart

And all at once

We revisted the site

Where the wounded lie

 

We examined their injuries

Doing our best to determine

If they were fatal

 

It requires a detached rationale

It laughs in the face of pure emotion

For life is smarter than you think

 

Forever your opponent

Even when pretending

To be a friend

 

For life brought me you

Star crossed

And ...

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heartacheheartbreaklifelosslovepain

Goodbye's hurt

I could fill the oceans with the tears I've cried
Or cover the entire earth with blankets of failed tries.
Countless times what I thought was truth became a lie.
Everything is falling apart, and I'm sick of asking why.
It gets so bad, to the point where I just want to die,
But all of this is nothing compared to the pain of goodbye.
What's the point of believing if you could never fly?
I'm a...

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goodbyeoceanpainsadtears

...Electricity...

This pain in the darkness…

It came to sudden eve to blaspheme the torment of branch through the quintessential. 

It took through the walls the solidity of ghost stories mending soul with ethereal strings and fire.

The amplitude of dust from centuries ferments in my body as life.

And, the blood seeps from the willow trees within pen as ink.

Playing into fruition heart chords drizzled...

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confessionshealingpainpoetpoetrypurgingsecretsstoryteller

kill me.

entry picture

Pain in my stomach, heart, mind,
stabs of a knife 
I yearn for this piercing pain 
I've lacked it far too long.

Ungrateful love:
Punch me, hurt me, kill me almost.

Almost.

so later
when the rain has ceased
a flower can bloom again
a new blossom
the same plant

Revive me, ungrateful love
Make me another

Kill me.

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break-upemotional painflowersfree formfree verselovenew startpain

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