Rudyard Kooistra on
7 hours ago
Reason suggests that I should function.
This world doesn’t sleep and nor do I.
Reason brings me false assumptions:
my reason sees reasons to lie.
Monday 5th April 2021 2:27 pm
It’s all a clue.
I’m the singular factor:
God and I have an understanding about truth.
Saturday 3rd April 2021 5:38 am
Am I a burden or a blessing?
Until now I've brought you pain,
nitpicked neurotic neural pathways
produced images of you burdening people
nuked your brain by old beliefs.
The pitter patter of your baby
put like a seal pup on your chest
but I was there for stop her suckling,
I didn't want her to breathe
No-one except me knew you bitch.
After all we've been thr...
Wednesday 24th March 2021 1:39 pm
he went home for the weekend
on a trial run before his release
wife, welcome with open arms
love and tenderness and peace
soon she changed acted strange
face turned to bones and wrath
body sank into itself, a shadow,
clothes turned to stinking cloth
she taunted him and sniggered
old issues raised painful heads
conflict in his mind, confusion,
they ended i...
Wednesday 3rd March 2021 10:56 am
lying in the bath, curled in a daze
staring at my hand, ring finger twitching
eyes losing focus, antipsychotics sedating
right foot twitching, clinically agitated
stomach protruding, appetite increased
screams of bubbles bursting, whispers intruding
scent of my body, artificial strawberry
ignore the shouts, but they hurt me
mountains of bubbles, naïve body purifying
Sunday 15th September 2019 7:57 am
What is the scale of reality?
We all have our own truths
Our own views
How do you quantify actuality?
“A fantasy is a vision
It is solely in your vision
It is envisioned by you
A vision is a fantasy”
But saints had visions!
Politicians have visions!
Some people have double vision
Anyone that has sight has vision
Whether they have a sixth sense
Wednesday 19th June 2019 1:28 pm
Whenever the bell rings.
Time to change so soon?
Oh thankyou for the gloom
Its not like I needed mental room
I'll just listen to your tune.
Is it time for bed,
Or are you not done yet?
This endless strain of thoughts
Feeling like I'm making a case In front of the courts
Barely awake, but barely conscious?
You'll wish you'd had your bedroom blessed
Wednesday 22nd August 2018 5:24 pm
Would you believe me
If I told you the truth
Would you stay with me,
Or would you just leave?
Would you still feel
The way that you do
If you saw me kneel
Before the demons so cruel?
I tried to escape
But it fell right through
It was never fate
What should I do?
I didn't mean to fail
I did choose you
But the monsters fight
Harder than I'm able to
Thursday 26th July 2018 10:34 pm
What is a disability?
Is it there for all to see?
Do they look a little special,
Or just a bit like me.
Maybe there is a wheel chair,
Crutches or a splint.
What about the eye patch?
Is there just a little hint?
What about that limp he has?
Or the crooked looking stance?
Some just look so ordinary.
They can even dance.
Some they think imagine it,
Thursday 22nd June 2017 6:05 pm
It's the door.
Don't come to the house,
Invasion not wanted!
Discussion not needed.
It's the door.
Blind with panic
Screams deathly quiet.
No need for checking on.
Perfectly capable self.
It's the door.
Tension of a coiled spr...
Friday 9th June 2017 2:07 pm
The preacher man was there.
Advising, guiding providing prayer.
He keeps himself hidden away
Wise words from him today.
The better place he beckons me to
transcendent mythical city for few.
His heaven is closer dragged in.
Going along he can never win.
He isn't there
He is no where
He is strong
He is right
I am weak
I am lost
I am gone
I am here
The preacher man was there...
Wednesday 17th May 2017 7:50 pm
Sat here waiting
Stupid posters on the wall
Like knowing 1/4 matters
Mental health for all.
The chairs are stained and dirty,
Water fountain broke,
Even leaflets on a stroke.
The receptionist she mumbles,
Or is it the glass screen,
Protects her from the patients,
Ring bells - they are unclean.
Mental or a leper,
It really doesn't matter.
You're all in thi...
Tuesday 28th February 2017 5:17 pm
In Pyjamas creased like discarded paper
Shuffling aimlessly in worn down slippers on flaccid feet
Come the fresh patients commited to the psychiatry machine
Eyes stare intently into space in obscure realms of fantasy
With word salad jabber so wayward and bewildered
For morning medication they agitatedly wait
Chlorpromazine drugged psychotics limbs tremoring like je...
Sunday 1st September 2013 5:45 am