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Exit Stage Left

If the Brexit Breferendum had been Branded Bremain would the outcome have differed, #thepowerofspin.

 

BrExit, whose Brainchild was that,

Disenfranchised by Brussles and BrEurocrats.

Burning our Bridges to Brace the Breeches.

Of borders Brexploited by Brigands and Leeches.

But were we too Brash? Perhaps a tad Brisk.

To Brexit stage left before assessing the risk.

Did the Br...

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Brexitspin

Dyn Hysbys

There are no wise men any more

their old wisdom is lost

no old spells that cure

no potions endure

where once they saved the farmer's herd

the mystery is blurred

and spells that helped a marriage spurned

are no longer learned

the people who once were in their debt

turn to the internet

 

There are no wise men any more

their actions show their flaws

no old spell...

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My Brexit Poem

Preamble: I know some folk are not going to like this, but it's my right to be angry and I don't care who knows it.

Live version on Youtube: https://youtu.be/ckq0X_z6I6M

 

On the 30th of March 2019

I shall wake up significantly older

And no longer European.

 

What a great birthday present history has prepared for me -

After 4 decades on this planet, “we’re revoking your Eu...

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BrexitSlamslam poetry

Juvenal 2 (: Europe 0)

I will! I will join Juvenal

at the North world’s end

on the frozen ocean ice

if one more lie is penned

another argument to slice

our country from its friend:

to make us pay the price.

Enough! We see the trend

let that one vote suffice

another will just offend

divide and not entice.

Let the peoples’ will transcend,

better not to ask them twice!

We’re doomed to...

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BrexitEUEuropegovernmentJuvenalparliamentsatiresUKuk governmentvote

Oh How Then

Oh How Then

The powers that be took us into this mess

And we as people decided to act

Yes that’s right we banged our pans and spoons

Screeching ENOUGH IS ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

You there over there yes you in Europe

With your plans and rules and laws and languages

We are English and do not want your rules

Or to be ruled by you from citadel Europe

What will we gain from this?

...

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brexitcountrymess

And so this is eX Ministerial Accord Season

Can it possibly be true

How the twelve months flew

Really twenty-four have passed

In terror of being outcast

Since that dire vote to leave

The parties it seems must all deceive

Mindless of the real cost

All thoughts of governance long lost

So the lady May survive

Gainst all that ministers contrive

Regardless of the pundits' sense

Ever blind to the expense

Ever d...

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The Hokey Cokey (Brexit Mess–up mix)

entry picture

You put David Davis in out
In Dominic Rabb, out, in Stephen Barclay 
You shake them all about
You do the Hokey Cokey and you turn this country upside down 
That's what it's all about...

Woah, the hokey cokey
Woah, the hokey cokey
Woah, the hokey cokey
Knees bent, arms stretched, let me out 

You put your right wing in
The moderates out
In, out, in, out
You shake them all about
You do t...

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Brexit

Colourblind

It was black and white

for a while

 

Until the first line

was drawn

 

Then the pale grey people

the people who could only draw

a black cross

in a white box

began to sense

other possibilities

shading the palette

 

The colours of debate

splashed clumsily

over everything:

the harsh red of anger

the yellow of injustice

screaming crimson

a har...

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Brexitcoloursdecisionsgovernmentpeoplepoliticsvotersvotes

The Royal Mint rides again!

Production’s stopped at JLR
the workforce isn’t making cars
the order book is looking thin
for Landrovers and Jaguars
but we’ve got stale bread and circuses
hip hip replacement hip hoorah
you can buy a rusted Ford Cortina now and point it at the exit
we’re gonna get a special 50p for Brexit!

Calm down dear, don’t make a fuss
that simply wouldn’t do
those whopping great lies on a bus
w...

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50pbrexittoken gesture

Rule Britannia?

What with all the omnishambles of Brexit, I got to thinking about what our national identity really is.  When you think about it, we have some pretty bizarre national symbols, but ultimately what does it mean to be British / English, etc?  See what you think of this...

 

Rule Britannia?

 

Our national dish is curry, true,

Our Saint is George who dragons slew,

From Yorkshire field...

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BrexitEnglandidentitylife

Late Wisdom

You're aching for peace

I'm hurting too

Let the arguing cease

There's polling to do

 

You look for meaning

I offer a word

No sense for your gleaning

I'm not sure they heard

 

You called referendum

I thought it was flawed

A meaningless thrum

On democracy's chord

 

You were not aware and

I never knew

That voting out fanned

A nationalist view

 

...

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bordersBrexitdemocracyEUpeacereferendumtradevotes

Autumn Thoughts

Black steel

curling wrought iron

balustrade

 

Beneath me

coffee steam

and noise

rise

 

and a poet

sits talking

animatedly

his foot jiggling

as he gesticulates

 

outside

autumn sun

shines on wet roofs

and casts

tree shadows

on house walls

 

outside

the sea is rising

while

London sinks

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AutumnbalconyBrexitcafecoffeeglobal warmingLondonshadowssun

Blubber boy.

He's fallen to his death on his plastic toy sword. 

To number ten from playpen his final reward.

This graceless coup is no coup de grace. 

No comedy of euros,  a cabinet farce, 

an egotistic act from flabby flatulent arse.

 

He'll be all over telly soon 

our fatty blundering hot air buffoon.

Puffing Shakespeare and Latin.

Please down let that twat in. 

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Boris JohnsonBrexitConservativesEUpolitics

Wake me up

Wake me up when the storm has passed
And the ravens have left the tower
Wake me up when the war machine
Has finally run out of power
Wake me up when the bigots
Have finally opened their eyes
And all of the presidents have given up telling lies
Wake me up when the tables have turned
And lessons have been learned

 

Wake me up when the big game hunters
Have finally paid for their crime
...

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big game huntesBrexitclimate changecoal miningfood banksNHSworking class

Unwanted

entry picture

Unwanted

 

I sit upon a judgement chair

And watch the lights

And hear the sounds

That emanate from over there

Where broken hopes

And dreams abound

 

You pay me well

But do not want me

Sitting there where you could sit

Taking up your place in hell

Amongst the blood

and tears and shit

 

I came from Spain

To ease the pressure

As hospitals began to...

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brexitforeign nursesICUNHS

Complex mathematics, Oldbury

When X is minus 13%
Z the square root of sod all
calculate the value of Y
where Y equals taking back control.

 

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Brexit

Wilderness 2001, 2021

You see

            a land wraithed in smoke and the stink of death

You feel

            man's determination dulled by desperation and

            the hollow, guilty hope that the creeping fate might end

            at a neighbour's door.

You cannot farm in the present

At least not in Wales.

The hills were silent memorials to herds brought low,

Uncropped: a tragedy of gr...

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BrexitCattleCymruEUEuropeFarmingfoot-and-mouthHill farminghillsLandSheepWales

Blizzard

entry picture

Blizzard

 

I’m a snowflake mate

if you like

unique

beautiful crystal

joining others

in a blizzard

that will white out

your false politics

stop your momentum

as we drift

into insurmountable

impassable glaciers

and in an avalanche

of hope

bury you forever

 

I’m a snowflake mate

whether you like it or not

one

a few

many

interlocking

...

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brexitclaim backprotestresistsnowflaketrump

21st Century Folly

On June 23rd the people chose

They chose to leave the club

They chose to stand alone

And they chose to snub.

 

They snubbed the whole of Europe

They took their toys and turned

They turned away from commonsense

And forget all that they’d learned.

 

They turned inward and gazed

Stared hard at their navels

Their children’s futures narrowed

As the parents turned ...

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BrexitEurope

A Song for Europe

In fifteen eighty eight the Spanish navy came to fight

To claim the crown King Philip thought was his god-given right

Now millions of us fly to Spanish islands in the sun

The wars are long forgotten, the Armada is long gone

 

So sing for Europe, sing for peace, and sing to make amends

Let’s raise a glass of sangria to all our Spanish friends

 

The French are nearer neighbou...

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brexiteuropepeacepoliticsreferendum

I Will Not Drink in Wetherspoon's

I'm still sore about the whole Brexit thing. I'm even more sore about the fact that yesterday my wife broke the JD Wetherspoons embargo that we've faithfully kept in place since their CEO decided to turn his pubs into campaign platforms for Vote Leave. Here's my response.

 

I Will Not Drink in Wetherspoon’s (with apologies to Dr Seuss)


I will not drink in Wetherspoon’s.
The place is ru...

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BrexitJD Wetherspoon

A Message to the New Government

entry picture

The nation needs renewables now!
The nation needs renewables now!

As Once-great Britain takes a bow
and we leave the stage of the European Union,
the quintessential issue's the quandary how
we accommodate the suck of an economy consuming 
two thousand million megawatt hours 
of climate wrecking energy by the year
when there's finite reserves of fossil fuel power.
I spurn the allegation ...

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Brexitclimateenergygeothermalhydropowerrenewablessolartidalwind

All Hail Bold Etonian Boris

entry picture

All hail bold Etonian Boris,
Whose exploits sent up quite a chorus,
To prove Europe was dead,
He swung down by his head,
Into the seat of Foreign Office.

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Boris JohnsonBrexitEUlimerickPoliticssatire

stabberjocky

(with apologies to Lewis Carroll)


‘Twas Brexit, and the slithy Gove
did frottercrutch in dwarfish glee;
he snicker-snacked the Camerove,
Machiavelliadastardly.

Beware the stabberjock, my son!
The empty eyes, the robo-glint!
who fellobrates the Murdocrone
the Ruperturtle übergimp!

He pallerised the BoJo cloon
they chummed upon their sunderbus
emblazoned it with fibberoons
and ba...

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ambitionbetrayalBrexitGoveMachiavellipolitics

Attrition

entry picture

Attrition

 

Sat here thinking

with chaos all around…

 

In this together,

family and friends,

some for

some against.

All affected

by the outcome.

All committed.

 

Sat here thinking

with chaos all around…

 

Europe needs us.

Allies need us

to face this thing

together and united

for our futures

and our children’s futures.

 

Sat here ...

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brexitchoicesreferendumthe somme centenary

This Bastard generation

entry picture

The dust has settled

On this burnt out land

Wiping up a desert storm of hatred

“Get out of My Land”

 

This bastard generation took it upon themselves

To set fire to happiness

Torch a refugee home

Spit in the face of their neighbour,

 Drilled holes of hatred into their children’s eyes

 

The dust has settled

On this burnt out land

 

The dust had settled …

...

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Brexit

Between A Rock & A Hard Place

entry picture

Between A Rock & A Hard Place

 

Trust me

said the man I didn’t trust

Stay in

 

every part of me

is against

what he stands for

but he has support

from the people

that I trust

 

Trust me

said the man I didn’t trust

Get out

 

every part of me

is against

what he stands for

but my heart aches

for what I believe

to be right

 

Don’t ...

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brexitEU debateeuro ineuro outreferendumundecided

OBAMARAMA


Oh President Barack Obama
'Dodgy Dave' might think you're a charmer
There to be seen
At the 'gig' for the Queen
So have some of this Instant Karma

 

Put UK at the back of the queue?
Is that what you really would do?
When it comes down to Brexit
If we stay or we exit
IT'S GOT FECK ALL TO DO WITH YOU!!

 

(c) Daniel Dwryran

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BrexitEuropepoliticstongue in cheek

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