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June

Let the anticipation build Let the angst grow inside your gut Allow it to rumble and tumble and wreck havoc on your insides Feel the magnetic pull when we lock eyes a little bit too long and struggle to break away Watch me watching you while trying to hide your prying eyes Don't you dare rush a thing

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angstanticipationartheartlosslovenewscaredsparks

I Used To Enjoy Knitting...

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‘I used to enjoy knitting…’

 

…enjoyed the sound of needles, click-

clacking as they struck against each

other plunging between stitches, metal

spearing and separating through soft wool.

Fingers swayed in a romantic dance above

the work to create a loop around its prey.

 

The whole hand grasps and manipulates,

taking the wool on a move back through,

glorying in the...

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alonedesperateknittingPoemscared

The greatest loss for a kid

My mum,

My mum of eleven years,

Has gone - never to walk the earth again.

The past years - what have I lost?

Not much…only:

A motherly figure to go to when in harm,

Someone to praise me when I’m succeeding,

Someone to hold me tight when I’m in need,

Someone to teach me right from wrong,

Someone to kiss me when I’m sleeping,

Someone to make me laugh,

Someone to tick...

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deathlost parentscared

Weakness and sorrow

I am always second guessing myself

hiding my shame and health

Never knowing what to do 

If i could only open up to you

It's scary the thing's i think 

always contemplating drink

the level of stress is unbearable

It makes me depressed and feel terrible

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afraidgrossscaredsorrowweakness

I See What Is To Happen (11/8/2017)

I'm Terrified

I’m scared that this is who I will be from now on

I’m afraid of what I might become

I’m scared that I’ll never have a healthy relationship

I’m afraid of losing everything again

I’m scared that any person who comes close to me will hurt me

I’m afraid of being isolated

I’m scared that I may be better off alone

I’m afraid of these thoughts racing

I’m scared th...

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heartbreaki didn't know what to do to keep youi knew i was losing youi wish you didn't have to push me awayscaredterrified

Falling

My Heart Beat Beat Beat.

My Heart Beat Beat Beat.

Feels like I am falling from 9000ft

A rollercoaster with no end

& when I am with you it begins to ascend

My Heart Beat Beat Beat.

My Heart Beat Beat Beat.

 

may be hidden and discreet, 

but it's the only way it can avoid defeat.

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FearhiddenLoveScared

Chapter 6:Her

entry picture

I think there’s a ghost in my room

A monster hiding underneath my bed

It haunts me at night

And invades all of my dreams

 

I’ve asked you to leave

Yet you keep coming by

Just when I think I’m safe and alone

You show up again worse than before

 

I feel like I’m being watched

I feel like I’m someone’s private move

This uncomfortable presence around me is unbearabl...

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hauntedscared

Tomorrow is a scary place

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This life can peel away the layers of how I feel
Battling me down wanting my courage to steal
Sometimes I go into my dark place
For my dreams and fantasies I cannot face
Will not let fears of failure take my happiness away
I will have the strength to see the end of this day
What can be done about tomorrow
Maybe your dreams I will borrow
Look into a life that’s not mine
Is your life all ha...

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intenselostlovescaredtomorrow

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