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Social Netjerking

facebook tells me i have been on this diary of misinterpreted thoughts 10 years yesterday. what better time to share this poem? i wrote this comical piece in a short-lived sabbatical i took last year:

I'm sick of being on facebook
i'm sick of all the likes
i'm sick of all this unfriending
and pics of stolen bikes

i'm sick of giving you a "thumbs up"
for something you said and did
and th...

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facebookpunk poetryrantsocial-media

Fuck Off Facebook

Sometimes I just wanna tell the world

“You know what? Just fuck right off!”

“Get outta here with your lies,

your half truths,

your unchecked, slanderous gossip,

your egocentric crap on social media.”

Once upon a time we talked to each other,

and actually listened!

Now, in this copy-and-paste era,

you don’t even hear what you’re saying yourself,

never mind what anybody...

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rant

BACON BUTTY

 

The advice comes from everywhere

The 'Spin Doctors' getting bolder

With lots of little anecdotes

To stop us getting older

 

So read it, take it all on board

You don't want any grief

Two minutes a day is all it takes

For you to floss your teeth

 

Two minutes hopping on each leg

"It's so good for the hip"

Where the hell does that come from?

It makes me wan...

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advicebreakfastgrowing olderhealthrant

My Savy

~~I was to write a poem, to tell you how I feel. But I feel rants are more raw, expressive and real. So here's a rant, just for you. My bubby pumpkin owl, my baby boo. It may rhyme from time to time, but the message of love will remain and you'll always be mine.

Savannah Sienna Rose. Such a name is so deep that it dwells within itself to decipher what it means. A name that is travels beyond two...

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boyfriendcouplegirlfriendlovepoemrantrelationshipsunedited rant

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

entry picture

Just say no to corrupt politicians,

lying and cheating with their secret missions.

Hugging the baby in the camera’s eye

then stealing its lolly and watching it cry.

 

Just say no to the corrupt EU,

actually achieving what Hitler failed to do.

A European State to control one and all,

watch as our borders and our nations fall.

 

Just say no to the media lies

and ques...

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NOPOLITICALRANTUNITEUNITY

Food Banks Are Bad

Some Advice From Edwina Currie, Former MP

Don’t give thanks
for local food banks
they encourage
the feckless
the greedy
the emotionally needy
the reckless
the addicts
the idle-by-habits
the drunkards
the hopeless
the gormless
the homeless
the wasters
the smokers
the cheaters
the faceless
the indigent
the immigrants
the lazy
the crazy
the tattooed dog owners
the debtors
th...

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Edwina CurrieOpinionPoemRant

The Old School Tie

entry picture

The Old School Tie

It’s very smart In blue silk,
with snazzy turquoise stripes.
When daddy gave it to me
my first words were “blimey!, cripes!”
I couldn’t wait to get it
around my scrawny throat,
it went so well with all my gear
especially the tail coat.

It made my chin more obvious,
I hadn’t known I had one.
It made the fags subservient
to get done what should be done.
It made me...

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cameronclassetonold school tierant

The Olympics Are Like An Onion. It'll All End In Tears...

Here's the latest post from the blog on my website:

I sometimes fear that I am becoming something of a broken record when it comes to the impending Summer Games. Not only that, but a broken record that had very little to say in the first place like, say, anything Coldplay have ever whined into a microphone. Or an interview with Boris Johnson. Honestly, I will never see the appeal of electin...

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AngerOlympicsrant

The Laziest Blogger in the Universe

 

As I have already got a blog up and running on my website, it seemed ridiculous (and too much like hard work) to write something completely new for this blog. What can I say? I'm just very lazy, and I only have so much rage. Anyway, here's the first post I made back in December 2011 that kicked it all off with a withering look at the previous 24 years of my life.

Enjoy, and feel free ...

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AngerJay-Zrant

DON'T GO OUTSIDE

 

Because there's kids

all scissorheads, blade-eyes,

machete hoods

and skin impervious to your reasonable begging

as they wave the pre-cutting knife

in a goodbye to your drained face.

 

They're behind every corner,

in every shop,

unstamped shouting on every high street.

And there's concrete abode blocks

hammering your daymare...

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captaindon'tgooutsidepoetryrantSpoken Word poetry

Preview sample of Captain of the Rant vs. Hair Explosion's forthcoming EP 'No Copyright Necessary'

Win for spoken word fans!

Here's the preview sample of Captain of the Rant vs. Hair Explosion's high anticipated forthcoming EP, 'Nudges Whispers and Threats'... the last EP, 'No Copyright Necessary', was called "a beautiful and resonant work" by Big Wheel Online Fanzine, and Attila the Stockbroker said he was "very impressed". High praise indeed!

Just follow this link: http://captainof...

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attilacaptainexplosionhairhiphopnudgespoetryrantthreatswhispers

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