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Ode To The Passing Of A Friend

Reflecting on the passing of a friend,

It’s hard to pass the sorrow of the day.

With all the thoughts that sadness will not end;

No matter how you seek to find a way.

The pulsing pain that pierces like a dart

To stab you and constrain your happiness

In mournful clouds of bitter mental strife;

You strive to strike apart

These shackles so that you can then address,

The joy...

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Ode

An Ode to Online Dating

I'm going to give this context by starting off reading my old match and pof profile. This is genuinely real. 

 

It's always hard to know what to say on these things so I'm just going to fill my profile with exaggeration and nonsense.

I would describe myself as a cross between Brad Pitts character in fight club and a sensitive fireman who likes kittens. Overall I'm pretty awesome. Kind, in...

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cynicismdatingfunnyhumourInternet datinglizardsmetaphorodeonline datingromancesimile

Ode to a friend

There's many a thing could be said about a man,

who practices the guitar whilst taking a dump.

A guy who sits between two parked chairs,

playing pool drunk,

then slumping to the floor comfortably numb.

 

Bathroom antics are this man's speciality,

best friend and lover with the bog brush,

his bed the floor.

His cosy duvet cover is the bath mat,

and the toilet for a pil...

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characterodepotrait

I Still Gets Excited By Snow

entry picture

I still gets excited by snow

(Immature for a pirate, I know)

When I climbs out on deck

There's snow up to me neck

As me shipmates all cower below.

 

I cannot conceal me delight

When I wakes to a flurry of white

So piratin's banned

Let's get them cannons manned

And have the world's best snowball fight.

 

Lesser pirates do not think this way

When I scream "Let's go out and play!"

They ...

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humourodeodiouspiratesnowwinter

Ready To Sail

entry picture

Ready to sail

Heavin' away

Succubi wail

Mizzen masts sway

Open yer mind

Bare me yer soul

Together we'll find

The treasure I stole

Ready to sail

Wi' ghosts of the dead

Scurrilous tales

Adventures ahead

We'll visit places

Both magic and strange

We shall meet faces

Unknown and deranged

What say ye mate?

Do we have an accord?

We're ready to sail

So jump ye aboard!

 

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