Sometimes I feel like saying every nasty thing that comes to mind
Making decisions for those who can't decide
It's demanding
Recyclable cycles supplying empathy and understanding

I'm just a human trying to be the best and give help to whom I'm sent
Devoted to the ones I love
Grateful for the help I receive
Sorry to those I've deceived
Guilty by nature ..due to low self worth and trauma
...

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I have it all 

locked up inside 

my soul tries to hide 

and I can’t find the reasons why 

once I was whole 

pure spirit, body and soul 

the umbilical cord cut 

and ready to go 

into an unbiblical world 

I didn’t know 

the years passed and I passed out 

locked in a cage of everyday life 

I forgot there once was 

a fire burning inside 

suffocating ...

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I'm sitting here, trapped, frozen in time

Head imploding, finally losing my mind

Nowhere to run, bound and confined

To the prison within, my unconscious mind.

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I feel dead inside

I can no longer hide

For so long I've lied

I promise, I truly tried,

But today is the day that I died.

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Heading from somewhere to nowhere, with uncertain self-control is scary.

Being numb is like being dead. To simply feel nothing, you are or somewhat believe to become nothing. I know this because I'm a victim of it.

I'm also free, I guess, I have no pain or sorrow –although I know what all these emotions feel like, or felt like- but also no happiness or joy. I'm unbreakable, there is nothing ...

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