Poetry Blogs (2020, pain)

Lil Ray of Sunshine

Yeah it's been longer than a minute,
so i gotta let this go,
everything that i've kept in,
these words ready to flow.
As much as i speak,
little did you ever know,
that this lil ray of sunshine turned into a pitchblack soul.
I remember a few years ago I preached a lot,
I had some words of wisdom so I shared my thoughts.
I preached about loyalty , respect and gangsta...

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Our pains - there are many kinds;
Some of body. Some of mind;
And so when we feel distressed
In many ways it is expressed.  

With body pains we scream or shout; 
And let people know what it's all about;
So they understand just how we feel,
As tis often short and soon will heal.

But our mind's problems are complex,
As they may have some strange effects.
And with such troubles we may retre...

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In a dusky morning, the sun was setting,
Wanted to scream in a silent mic.

No more of this frustration, no more of this hatred,
Death was the only freedom came to his mind.

Listening to the people, listening to himself he realised,
Many a things don't matter, So does his life.

Losing his hobby, his like, his ego, his pride.
Losing his humanity, was what it was like.

'Try to stay po...

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To hang on a wall of my empty room,

I think I will need a picture of rain.

Hitting the ground, and springing up to ankles,

Rain wets the socks and trousers from below.

My eyes chase along

Roof-edges, streets, sidewalks,

--tick, tick, tick--

Checking all, one by one,

To find a dark brolly,

And a woman in black enamel shoes,

Lightly treading the...

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Surely, not
The man who
Fits in,
Slips in,
Slides on,
Can be worn
Like the thorn,
Should it
Hurt?

Surely, not
The man who
Smiles with truth,
Holds your hand
The man who
Understands,
Who doesn't taste like sin
The man who
Walks lighter than falling pins,
Whose shape is vein thin,
Who fits in
The man who
Will slip in,
Who you can slip on,
Who can be worn,
See you wan
Mend yo...

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In the ruins

Of my temple

My fireplace

Once in control

Reminiscing

My warmest kiss

In the arms of

My arsonist

To face new growth

Beyond pardon

The path across

Burning demons

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Now when i look back to my life after all these years of pain and sorrow,

only to realise that how far i have come.

Looking back to my older dark soul,

i am proud of my growth.

I am just 20 and i know there's a long long road ahead,

and i am ready for it.

This one last look to my past,

with teary eyes and a bright smile.

Now i am leaving behind my past, ...

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I was reading a story

When i felt a sudden spark of pain in my heart

I was feeling like someone was piercing needles deep inside my soul

It was unbearable and tears were rolling down 

I closed my eyes, it was all dark

And then i saw you

I tried opening my eyes but I couldn’t 

Because deep inside I still wanted to see you for maybe one last time even when nothing was real 

B...

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Sometimes even when everything is right

Nothing feels right 

Everything is complete 

But deep down all you feel is emptiness  

Your life is going smooth 

But all you feel is sadness

You’re happy 

But all you do is cry

You don’t know the reason

But all you feel is pain enduring you

You don’t want to give up

But all you do is losing hope

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I’m wondering what happened this time

You were here one day and gone the next

You took root in my mind again and I let you

Then you leave me hanging

I can’t even question why you are doing this

I keep telling myself you owe me no explanation

But then you left this breathless space in my chest

And I don’t know what to do with it

Feels like goodbye is in order

But I’m not ...

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Pain, Pain go away

Go and never come back soon

It’s becoming more difficult to hide you these days

Please kindly go away.

Tears and sniffles go away

Ruining my face with your runny self

I still have to put up a brave face for the tide ahead

Please do me the favour of staying away

This thing called happiness

Has eluded me for a while now

I just feel so tired...

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You lie awake in bed with your eyes swollen from the tears and the pain

Wondering why you deserve to hurt

You play back scenes in your head thinking , " Was it all fake!"

The smiles, the love, the times we laid together in bed, talking about children, and houses by the lake

You close your eyes and tears fall down your face and you cry to God , " Please, please make it all go away!"

...

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A summer's Christmas,

A winter's Easter,

Sun blazed reflections,

Moon chilled features,

Decaying bright shadows,

Renewing dark radiance,

Exogenous void within',

Luminescently extraneous,

Lagging just to rush,

The constantly inconsistent,

Concealing joyous sorrows,

Being contiguously distant,

Thoughts resistantly flowing,

Nerves electrically static,

Hearing...

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I can't take it,

I'm only asking,

Please Lord help me,

I'm tired of relapsing,

Over and over,

My veins are collapsing,

I know you hear me,

I'm sorry for babbling,

I don't understand,

Why this keeps happening,

I'm covering the pain,

It's so everlasting,

The hurt burns deep,

It never stops dragging,

Life is a slow death,

It's truly a sad thing,

My hand...

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The oak tree

Unwavering and sturdy

Tells us how to be:

Don’t break so easily

In the slightest change of wind

Climbing back through my childhood bedroom window

Landing on shards of broken glass

Crimson oozes slowly

As I pray each stab is its last

So much has shaken me since my first landing

Each step taken cuts deeper than the beginning

Looking back 

Th...

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You’re standing still at the top of a hill, the breeze gradually increasing, staring intently at he picturesque view of the voracious desert terrain that could ultimately devour you with a single touch. the breeze has been blowing, constantly blowing for many months, you forget what it was like to have still, calm air around you. But the breeze is picking up, you start shaking, not because of the ...

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I enjoy bringing tough guys and gals to their knees.

I can make everyone in my path cry like babies. 

You think you can stop me with drugs or alcohol?

That’s a fool’s game.

It will drive you insane. 

Your candy doesn’t keep me away

anymore than a cross stops suffering. 

The only escape is to free me

from the one place you fear to go. 

I reside deep within your mind.

I...

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Long ago,

longing for a doll's house, 

a teddy bear,

and a ventriloquist puppet.

Longing to be held, comforted, soothed.

Longing for the safety of home,

something to cuddle and a companion.

Longing for the pleasure of play,

the delight in losing oneself in make believe:

escaping reality.

I picture myself,

five years old and,

painting in my yellow, plastic smock ...

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fill me up with cum

or drugs, smoke and rum 

use me

or let me use myself

not because i enjoy either

but because i deserve both

,

- i am a bad person 

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here i sit, again

venting with keys that 

no one

no one

not a soul

will ever read, 

creating universes

that will idly hum for eternity

without exisitng ever

it's really pathetic

that i can't take pain

without turning into poetry

i can't even do it well

but god

fuck

i miss you so much,

and it hurts

more 

than anything

the worst part is that i...

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A songbird’s sweet melody 

ushers angels to

light up your lonely lair, 

shoo fears away, 

make peace with your pain, 

set your spirit free...

to love, 

unconditionally. 

https://youtu.be/aQVz6vuNq7s

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I know I traded something

A part of me

For the splendid splendour of money

I did that thing you shouldn’t do

I gave myself to him

You know, the soul

Cut a piece of myself out for him

You know, the heart

I cut a piece of myself off for him

(You know which part)

But I didn't feel a thing

I'm waiting to miss it

Miss this

Thing

I'm waiting for the pain

You...

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I really wish I went to college 
I can’t believe I trusted that bitch
But was it love or just a lack of knowledge 
Shit hurt my heart seeing my big brother 
Cuff a bitch that had mileage 
He went to jail, she told him I tried to fuck ha
Ian even have no money 
So ion even know why the butch was lying 
Niggas buy anything a bitch tell em when they in jail  
But damn big Jevo Ian even have ...

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the pain gets too overwhelming

i find myself sitting alone dwelling 

on the past life that led me to drugs

i sit wondering where i went wrong, lost all my friends; im an outcast, i dont belong

and i dont understand why god kept me living

what does all he suffering bring but an eternal hell thatg suffocates me

losing all efforts, it feels like i cant breathe

and the battle goes...

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it’s 6:21 and when I look out my window from the corner of 29D, 

there’s a subtle hue of blood orange outlining what looks like the perimeter of 

a space

of sky

and a breeze of clouds, lighter than feathers, so thin, as if it forgot to carry the mist it was designed to pour tonight 

but that’s okay, because it found itself a new purpose:

your shrewd orange spirit is now perf...

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