I watched myself turn to something,
A person I was afraid to be.
Swallowed by anger, hatred and resentment,
I kept my head high for too long,
I couldn't bear what I was.
A retard and a drunkard with a lost soul,
Sold into trauma trying to please people.
Put them at ease, subtle hypnosis.
Pain, regret and depression served,
Don't know if that's karma saved for me.
Friday 1st October 2021 7:38 am
Asking for something that I've been searching for
Something I couldn't predict
Isn't always what it seems
Not always something legit
You were something I couldn't fathom
You came with a price
Your heart belonged to another
Something that wouldn't suffice
I walked away with a heart full of pain
And tears running down my cheek
You're someone I felt so calm with
Where I even lost words ...
Wednesday 2nd December 2020 1:32 pm
She sits there her book full of latent codes,
a way of communicating so no-one knows
Rambling on my life, traces of a history unread:
a mind full of trash and misdeeds unsaid.
She's a pristine therapist, who hasn't lived,
expecting me to say all and give,
when I couldn't give a shit about her plan.
Tuesday 25th February 2020 5:46 pm
So sharp and so cunning
Is the pain that run through me,
Hideous yet so stunning.
I want to keep it here,
I want to feel it's cold aching
Blood spilling from me
My heart is still breaking
What if I want it to stop?
Please, leave me alone!
It'll be there. Waiting.
For me to decay down to bones.
Maybe that's what I wa...
Thursday 15th February 2018 9:55 pm