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M.C. Newberry

Thu 8th Feb 2018 17:53

It has never been lost on me how the lunacy and brutality
of war seem destined to advance knowledge and the
products of progress at a rate not experienced in peacetime.

Comment is about A QUESTION OF WAR (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

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John Coopey

Thu 8th Feb 2018 17:36

Thanks, Marc.

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Marc Hawkins

Thu 8th Feb 2018 17:30

TYPE III
Colonial history will still dictate how the men around here
Practice love through hate
For aesthetic purposes; an ethnic marker
Gender controlled by husband...son...father
Against my will.

I can let nature take its course, the uneasiness in how I pass
Bears nothing to your immoral force with which you open me up
Your gateway to a selfish pleasure
And I once believed that being loved
Was close to being treasured
I am as trapped as a bird in a cage
Modified and made ugly by your commission
Disfigured by tradition and religion and holy wars
And chained by the fear that renders me yours
Against my will

My sisterhood grows, from northeast Africa
To the sub-Sahara
Young and joyless and bound by doctrines
No pursuit of happiness. No pleasure to come
No great expectations. Nothing foretold
Nothing that has been or gone
Objects more of control than desire
My eyes that once shone with innocent love
Now burn with hate fuelled fire…and all because...
You denied me a fall from grace, you denied me self discovery
No different to putting scars on my face
Or is that too much a public recovery?
You denied me womanhood. You denied me choice
I censor my thoughts and silence my voice
And I think of our mothers and their mothers
And of the honour and pride they felt
When this exact same fate to them was dealt
And why did they not feel humiliated? Abused?
Mutilated? Used?
Maybe when we live in a world without light
We relinquish our strengths and fall prey to our plights
Enlightenment and knowledge, I was lead to believe,
Are the roads to freedom
Our mothers learned nothing other than to serve and to please
And here am I, enlightened but sedated
Imprisoned, captive, segregated
Dysmorphic now, a victim still
And all of this against my will

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

<Deleted User> (18980)

Thu 8th Feb 2018 16:33

What's the reason for the broken lines?

Comment is about Aberystwyth Scenes, 1970 (blog)

Original item by Chris Armstrong

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keith jeffries

Thu 8th Feb 2018 15:54

Jon,

thank you for this kind comment. Your Dad sounds remarkable. The Bible gives us an allotted time of three score years and ten but eighty if we are strong. That says a lot for Dad.

Keith

Comment is about Three Score Years & Ten (blog)

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Jon

Thu 8th Feb 2018 13:49

Hi Keith

A brilliantly worded piece, it has much in common with everyone's experience I should imagine.
Me Dad always says the Bible says we should live threescore years and ten but he's ninety one this year!
He reckons he's out of date.
A stunning last stanza mate.

Jon

Comment is about Three Score Years & Ten (blog)

Original item by keith jeffries

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Jon

Thu 8th Feb 2018 13:43

Thanks to everyone who read, commented and liked The Close. I never intended to make it so lengthy and revisited it loads of times to edit and chop it down a bit.

I almost didn't put it on because of it's length but it's done now anyway. Cheers again everyone for taking the time out to read it.

Jon

Comment is about The Close (blog)

Original item by Jon Darby

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Tom

Thu 8th Feb 2018 12:41

Wow, that was quite affecting! Excellent work ?

Comment is about Letters (blog)

Original item by Chris Armstrong

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Laura Taylor

Thu 8th Feb 2018 12:39

My heart goes out to you, I'm so sorry for your loss. This is a beautiful, winsome, densely-coloured poem, that reverberates with profound emotions, and has a wonderfully original feel to it. Well, of course it does, you've never written this before, and you'll never write anything like this again.

Comment is about Above (blog)

Original item by Maia Moon

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Laura Taylor

Thu 8th Feb 2018 12:34

Hey, thanks Steve ?

I had the first verse for this for ages, but watching The End of the F**king World recently plunged me right back to that chaos and vulnerability of youth and got me thinking - the end result being this poem. Glad you like it ?

Comment is about Not Exactly Miss Jean Brodie (blog)

Original item by Laura Taylor

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Richard

Thu 8th Feb 2018 10:43

What I love about this poem is the unashamed length. So often we rail against being too long or overwordy in the fear of perceived self-indulgence, both from the poet and his/her peers.
No such guilt on show here, oh no!
It's brilliant it's original it's long and all the better for it.
Thanks for being brave JBD, I would love to be in the audience for this one with a big bag of crisps and a sparkling water.

Well done my m8

Comment is about The Close (blog)

Original item by Jon Darby

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Chris Armstrong

Thu 8th Feb 2018 10:27

Very atmospheric, David - I really liked the imagery: "while age sat weary on the family’s creaking roots" is particularly good (IMO!)... and "marbled with seams of old finger nails". It really captures the time.

Funnily enough, I have also just written about ash - but a very different context!

Comment is about roots and branches (blog)

Original item by David T Jones

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keith jeffries

Thu 8th Feb 2018 09:34

Stu,

Thank you for your comment. It is much appreciated. Since I joined WoL last year in March I have discovered a group of fellow poets with thom I can relate. With your work I often feel a sense of affinity which nearly always has a strong spiritual element to it. Thank you. Keith

Comment is about Three Score Years & Ten (blog)

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Stu Buck

Thu 8th Feb 2018 08:28

excellent piece of writing keith and as previously mentioned i find it quite easy to relate to. i just hope you find as much spiritual catharsis in your writing as i do mine.

Comment is about Three Score Years & Ten (blog)

Original item by keith jeffries

<Deleted User> (13762)

Thu 8th Feb 2018 08:28

'with his wings up'
'into the traffic of the courtyard'

love it!

Comment is about Coffee Break (blog)

Original item by Tom Harding

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Jacob Martin

Thu 8th Feb 2018 05:28

Thank you for the comment Keith!

Comment is about Jacob Martin (poet profile)

Original item by Jacob Martin

Big Sal

Thu 8th Feb 2018 03:47

My condolences. Wonderful remembrance in poem form.

Comment is about Above (blog)

Original item by Maia Moon

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Stu Buck

Wed 7th Feb 2018 23:20

thanks steve. i've been reading a lot of e.e. cummings lately (after picking up '73 poems' from the poetry bookshop in hay-on-wye) and i love his use of brackets and space. he almost seems to be writing two or three poems at once. anyway, thanks for commenting im glad you liked it. hope to see you at some point this year for more poetry/ale.

Comment is about van (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

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Martin Elder

Wed 7th Feb 2018 22:45

Thanks for liking this Hannah. Much appreciated

Comment is about Waking up my people (blog)

Original item by Martin Elder

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Martin Elder

Wed 7th Feb 2018 22:44

Thanks to David for liking and Nigel Stu and Hannah for commenting.

Why am I not surprised that you singled out that particular line Nigel.

Glad you appreciated the banality of our lives sometimes Stu. I am reminded of the Good life and the Richard Briers characters response to the humdrum. Comically anarchic !

I can understand where you are coming from being a place with so many fire doors Hannah. there is always the hope that they will lead somewhere new. But it is seldom the case.

Thanks everybody
Martin

Comment is about Doors (blog)

Original item by Martin Elder

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steve pottinger

Wed 7th Feb 2018 20:15

There's some cracking lines in this poem, Laura. The couplet which finishes with "seamless pelt" is just beautiful.

?

Comment is about Not Exactly Miss Jean Brodie (blog)

Original item by Laura Taylor

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steve pottinger

Wed 7th Feb 2018 20:10

That's a great first line, MC.

Comment is about A QUESTION OF WAR (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

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steve pottinger

Wed 7th Feb 2018 20:09

I really like this piece, Stu. I must have read it three or four times, and relished it on each occasion.

Comment is about van (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

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M.C. Newberry

Wed 7th Feb 2018 19:01

JC - I note your point about "enforced circumcision in infants" having religious causes but it is not equitable
with the effects of FGM in my view - for reasons previously shown.
But now I must get my supper and close my own contributions to this particular blog and the cause of
free speech (e.g. aka the right to give offence).
Please accept my nomination for the "Mel Brooks Award"
for bad taste. Oh vey!

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

<Deleted User> (16099)

Wed 7th Feb 2018 18:45

Nice write and that picture is definitely not me LOL

Comment is about Diary Of The Southern Queen Entry #48 (His Fine Self) (blog)

Original item by Chiari Warrior Soldier

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Saniya

Wed 7th Feb 2018 18:34

This poem is more about expressing my love towards someone. My reference to Luther was for Luther Vandross.

Comment is about I Can Be That (blog)

Original item by Saniya

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Saniya

Wed 7th Feb 2018 18:15

Thank you!

Comment is about Daddy's Little Girl Wish (blog)

Original item by Saniya

Big Sal

Wed 7th Feb 2018 18:13

Anyone can be a father, but it takes a real special person to be a daddy. Good poem.

Comment is about Daddy's Little Girl Wish (blog)

Original item by Saniya

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John Coopey

Wed 7th Feb 2018 17:42

I have to go now, Laura. I've looked out the window and there's life outside. I'm going to join them.

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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raypool

Wed 7th Feb 2018 16:10

I'll try to give my simple answers to the raft of great comments herein today !

David, thanks mate. You seem to re-inforce the poem's suggestion as to bringing influences to the table ; I personally think that some people are "receivers" or call them mediumistic in that parlance; others may have an innate sensitivity which acts as a trigger in certain environments. I have had too many weird experiences (apart from using WOL) not to be thus aware . It makes life interesting and also a challenge. The issue of redemption and all that jazz I think is drafted on or shall we say inwardly interpreted from a smorgasbord of issues, some of which are of course are inherited. I think some poems are "contrived" and others are outpourings with lots of shades in between. Not sure where mine lie -but I do like to be in control!!

Thanks Paul. The practice of exorcism seems to be connected with demonology and "evil influences." I have been with clairvoyants who claimed to have sent spirits on from an earthbound limbo attracted by past attachments. This perhaps is in the same vein as you mention, without of course the training and backing of a vast edifice that gives it credibility. As society becomes more materialistic in its methods, so the grip becomes more tenuous of course. Superstitions could give rise to mania and hysteria in the past. Thanks for reflecting on
the last verse. It is, like so much, just an idea.

Thanks Jennifer, so many stories out there! My brother camped in Glencoe, and swore that he heard massed bagpipes as he drifted off, It spooked him out. What he ate I canna say! Thanks for sharing that. Talking of Italy, actually Venice, check out Don't Look Now.!

Many thanks additionally for liking this,David, Ruby and Psylentskog.

Suki, fascinating thoughts indeed. We are mainly composed of chemicals and electricity I suppose and are we just terminals? wow! Quantum physics may yet reveal what you suggest.

Thanks Hannah. I know what you mean. Children seem to much more open to the unexplained, perhaps because parents have not had yet time to do it for them.

Also thanks Ray for trying to step up to the plate.

Ray Luv to all.


Comment is about RESTLESS SOULS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

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Laura Taylor

Wed 7th Feb 2018 15:24

Nope. I've definitely not misunderstood you.

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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John Coopey

Wed 7th Feb 2018 14:41

Thanks,each.
I'm not sure enforced circumcision of infants in some religions meets with your model,MC.
Laura. I think you have misunderstood my thread.I am not presuming to tell you what to think. I am telling you what I think which, I am sure you will agree, is within my ownership.

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

<Deleted User> (18980)

Wed 7th Feb 2018 14:26

Comment is about J R Harris (poet profile)

Original item by J R Harris

<Deleted User> (18980)

Wed 7th Feb 2018 14:25

Jim I could write an absolute tome
About things experienced in monochrome
But this would be infinitely duller
Than telling things in technicolour

Comment is about J R Harris (poet profile)

Original item by J R Harris

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M.C. Newberry

Wed 7th Feb 2018 13:37

To associate male circumcision with FGM is not wholly appropriate.
The former is a process in medicine intended to avoid the
possibility of infection and related difficulties and as a
non-Jewish circumcised male this was an operation that
was completed when I was an infant. I have never had
any cause to concern myself about any lack of choice
that might now be argued over in these more aware but
often less informed times.
Satire - use of irony, sarcasm, humour to expose folly etc
- surely including the act under discussion since it is
sanctioned by a certain social,religious and sexual section
of human society as somehow acceptable whilst minus any medical
justification in any shape or form.
Not to mention its occurrence is hardly contributing to
ensuring its continued presence in the public consciousness and the likelihood of any change for the
better.
That said, I'll reiterate my belief that the freedom to
give offence should never be subjugated into silent servitude by the fear of giving offence.


Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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John Bastard

Wed 7th Feb 2018 13:32

thanks stu,

i actually performed this one last night with a couple of handy edits applied.

Comment is about strong (02/05/2018) (blog)

Original item by Zach Dafoe

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Laura Taylor

Wed 7th Feb 2018 11:41

None of which even come close to the savagery inflicted by FGM, with the exception of male circumcision, and even that does not come close to the huge volume of devastating effects.

I don’t often comment on your output, but this is something that most decent compassionate human beings find utterly abhorrent, and you have surprised me with the vehemence of your continued defence of it. Speaks volumes.

As for “What happens if you’re offended? Nothing. Nothing happens”, the World Health Organisation, the United Nations, UNICEF, and many other organisations’ campaigns and legislation against FGM stand as clear evidence of what exactly can and does happen.

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Wed 7th Feb 2018 11:10

Thank you all for such warm comments. My own heart nearly cracked with love and amazement realizing both the scope and the depth of his thought at eleven years old. It was the last verse that really 'got me', an exact summation of all metaphysical thinking. And he said, 'You look funny.' Not too surprising; I felt 'funny' to the core of my being.

I'm really glad I decided to share, with his permission, of course. The poem was posted on the classroom bulletin board.

And the old folks pass the chalice to the young, always with hope for greater understanding and finer achievements in 'world peace'. Not a phrase to be sneered at.

Comment is about 'My Song of God' by Ewan Thomas Holt, Age 11 (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

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John Coopey

Wed 7th Feb 2018 10:55

Laura, I've parodied prostate cancer and circumcision. I've parodied Jeremy Corbyn, Tony Benn and Diane Abbott. I've parodied Theresa May, David Cameron, Boris Johnson and Nigel Farage. I've parodied men and I've parodied women, mysoginists and mysandrists. I've parodied Remainers and Brexiters. I've parodied national treasures and cause celebres. If there's an issue close to your heart I haven't yet parodied, it's because I will. If you're offended, be offended. You won't break out in buboils.

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Graham Sherwood

Wed 7th Feb 2018 10:22

There’s a quality to this writing that leaches from each line. One of the better POTW.

Well done!

Comment is about 'Roots and branches' by David T Jones is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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David Taylor-Jones

Wed 7th Feb 2018 10:22

Wow, this is amazing, thanks for all of your comments and support?

Comment is about 'Roots and branches' by David T Jones is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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Laura Taylor

Wed 7th Feb 2018 09:49

Cheers Stu and Pat ?

Stu - I'll email you about lack of light and the FB ban! I love that you hear it now in my voice ? Weirdly, I've almost memorised it already - that's incredibly fast for me!

Comment is about Not Exactly Miss Jean Brodie (blog)

Original item by Laura Taylor

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Laura Taylor

Wed 7th Feb 2018 09:47

“laboured”, John? It’s not exactly Paradise Lost now, is it?

It’s nothing like your analogy. It is precisely to do with making a joke about the horrific and terrifying mutilation of young girls that ruins the lives of countless women, and leads to infection and death in many cases, as well as denying them any sexual pleasure they might have been able to experience in later life.

Are you scared of losing face? The fact you are defending it as simply ‘poor taste’ and deflecting responsibility for it onto others – well, that’s the only conclusion I can draw.

MCN – this is not satire. Don’t be ridiculous.


Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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John Coopey

Wed 7th Feb 2018 09:22

You’re right, el P. Or is it the timeless attraction of a vagina? (You’ll note even my fiercest critic “laboured” to the last verse before finding something with which to take issue - rather like complaining about the cake on the last mouthful).

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Chris Hubbard

Wed 7th Feb 2018 03:17

It does, Stu, it does. And thank you.
Chris

Comment is about Buried in the Sunlight (blog)

Original item by Chris Hubbard

elPintor

Wed 7th Feb 2018 01:46

A real testament to, "bad press is better than no press at all."

Rachel

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Big Sal

Tue 6th Feb 2018 23:44

Libertad!

Comment is about Scream… (blog)

Original item by Noris Roberts

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John Coopey

Tue 6th Feb 2018 23:07

You are quite right, Ray. The line is in very poor taste, as is the rest of the poem. Of course, I never signed up to be tasteful.
And as Steve Hughes asks “What happens if you’re offended? Nothing. Nothing happens”.

Comment is about HEY THERE VAGINA (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Greg Freeman

Tue 6th Feb 2018 21:55

Too many other commitments, Graham! But thanks.

Comment is about The oak tree (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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Stu Buck

Tue 6th Feb 2018 21:39

excellent ray especially the powerful last verse

Comment is about INERTIA (blog)

Original item by ray pool

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