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Mon 28th Mar 2011 23:54
Or starves the other?
Comment is about one life (blog)
Original item by Beulah
Mon 28th Mar 2011 23:27
What a lovely poem. Probably not the desired response but at the end I started laughing. Takes all sorts.I loved the story, though. Rhythm could be tidied up a few places.
Like, simply "Mr Nagata surveys the familiar / pulling the sack around his shoulders" Could have done without the Zen proverb verse, though the following one I enjoyed a lot.
Comment is about Plum blossoms in snow (blog)
Original item by Dave Morgan
Mon 28th Mar 2011 23:17
Thanks Julian-will do!
Comment is about Gareth Writer-Davies (poet profile)
Original item by Gareth Writer-Davies
Mon 28th Mar 2011 23:16
Quite so Pete : )
Mon 28th Mar 2011 23:06
The gig guide is not quite as searchable as we would like - wil be better soon - but I have had a quick look through the towns list. Not sure what counts as North Herts but I am guessing Hitchin, Stevenage area? Cambridge has quite a few events. Anyhow, if you go to the gig guide and type the following into search, you might find what you are looking for, the other thing to bear in mind is that new events are coming in at around five a day, so keep watching. And you might want to set your own up. Give me a shout if you do want to do so, perhaps we can help. we will certainly give you what support we can.
there have been events from time to time in
Hitchin, Dunstable, Leighton Buzzard, St Albans, Stony Stratford and Ware. so it is worth searching the website from time for these places and Northampton too has a regular event.
Mon 28th Mar 2011 22:15
p.s just put another one up if you're interested
Comment is about Melanie Coady (poet profile)
Original item by Melanie Coady
Mon 28th Mar 2011 22:11
great powerful direct imagery and emotion.
Comment is about when that daylight hit us again (inspired by Gareth Writer-Davies' Junk poem) (blog)
Original item by David Mac
Mon 28th Mar 2011 22:10
Thanks for all the kind comments Melanie. You're fast becoming my biggest fan on here :).
Mon 28th Mar 2011 22:04
great rant Mike, I bet it goes down well in performance. Like the sting in the tail.
Comment is about Chaos magnet (blog)
Original item by mike watts
Mon 28th Mar 2011 22:01
Yes it was a long winter.
Comment is about It felt like a long winter. (blog)
Original item by Marianne Daniels
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:59
Like splitting the atom! Not that I have a clue what that's about. Small but perfect as they say. Not being a romantic I could argue with the sentiment but not with the control, and I'm still thinking about it. It's also short enough to remember. A great virtue on the performance circuit. I must take note.
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:56
Indeed it is Banksy, indeed it is.
p.s Loved 'Is god a woman?', dead funny :D.
Comment is about Banksy (poet profile)
Original item by Banksy
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:52
Nice one Andy, my acquaintance Dicko from Salford is one of those characters. Neat juxtaposition of two unrelated events, works well. Stanza 3, "interested" for "answered"?
Comment is about Up on the Roof (Strangeways) (blog)
Original item by Andy N
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:43
Hi Greg; - glad you like 'Spring is Coming'.. Oddly enough I had this morning going to work, but that was more fog based... Not fun atall! lol
Glad you liked it anyhow.
Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:42
Hi Philipos; - Cheers for the comment over 'Spring is Coming'. I agree with you over the language... I tend to normally go for longer pieces nowadays, which makes it even more fun doing shorter pieces...
And let's hope this spring is a good un!
cheers again - A
Comment is about Philipos (poet profile)
Original item by Philipos
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:40
thanks for the comment on 'Spring is coming' Melanie.. It's one of those pieces this one that was a little interlude between longer, heavier stuff shall we say but I had great fun writing it
let's hope it a good un this year! A
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:39
Hiya Laura, thanks for the comment on 'she made her mark'. I'm a fan of Tom Waits so that's a massive complement for me, cheers. She left a mark on my memory too. That one was worse than the scars.
Nuff luv 'n' tha', Jack
Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)
Original item by Laura Taylor
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:38
thanks for the comment on 'Spring is coming' Cat.. To be honest, it was only meant to be a little bit of fun this one while I am working on some somewhat more heavier stuff, shall we say but I did have great fun reflecting spring in all of it's beauty.
let's hope it a good un this year! A
Comment is about Cate (poet profile)
Original item by Cate
Mon 28th Mar 2011 21:32
thanks everybody for the comments - it was a bit of fun this piece in-between more meatier material but great fun reflecting spring in all of it's beauty.
let's hope it a good un this year! A
Comment is about Spring is Coming (blog)
Raving over the section below which really sings but as ever loved all your words.
"a swan, a mirror’s heart,
walks, with liquid rippling shoes,
aging where it was told to smooth,
with lacy will, the treadmill white,"
Mon 28th Mar 2011 20:34
Not a pheasant plucker, Foxy; rather it's a cunning stunt, isn't it?
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Mon 28th Mar 2011 19:05
I do edit some of them, but I really have to be careful which ones I choose to spend the time on. I've spent weeks taking a poem through drafts just to realize I've wasted my time, and I really don't have that much time to waste. I am a single father of two children, attend school full time, work as a part time probation officer three days a week, and I just don't have time.
I think your all misunderstanding me, it's not that I wouldn't like to try to take all my poems through the editing process, I would love to do that to anything I write that shows even the smallest amount of possibility. Realistically though, I will never have that chance, at least no time soon. I sit in the back of court rooms and write in little books that can fit in my pocket, I write in between classes, I write when I am sitting in a parking lot waiting for my kids to get out of school. These places allow me to quickly write what I can, not to examine every line and see what should be going where, what should be removed or added.
That's why I am so glad I found this website. You don't know how nice it is to be able to share a poem you have mixed feelings about as soon as it's written and actually have feedback. I would love to hear more harsh criticism, to be told more often what I'm doing wrong, but still, I love it. I usually have to hand my little notebooks to friends and wait weeks for them to get back with nothing more than a number at the top of a page (one through nine) which gives me a general idea of how much they like or dislike it. And to be honest, I can't really trust them, I think they are scared of hurting my feelings because they will rate dumb poems I put in there on purpose to be bad with 7's or 8's.
Look at me getting far from the subject. Anyway, about twice a year I'll gather together a couple hundred I think are deserving and seek out a self publishing place and make a book. It usually ends up costing me a couple hundred bucks, but poetry is my passion, I know there isn't a way to ever make a career out of it, but that doesn't matter much. As long as I think I have something to say, and a unique way of saying it, I'll be sitting in the back of courtrooms with my head down, scribbling in a little book that looks like it's been in my back pocket for too long.
Comment is about Untitled (blog)
Mon 28th Mar 2011 18:56
I asked a friend's dad what his two siblings had died of in their infancy, one next to him in bed at two years of age. "Poverty, lad", came the reply. This was the twenties. The era you write about was when my grandfather died, of poverty too; having been in the trenches in WW1, the only work he could get back home was stoking the boilers at the power station. Refusing to eat much when his kids had so little, and working so hard, is what killed him.
One of the best dramas on TV for many a while was When the Boat comes In. Thanks for the memories,eh?
Comment is about No Jobs For A Man (blog)
Original item by Dave Dunn
Mon 28th Mar 2011 17:24
Blimey, Ken Dodd's Dad must be pretty ancient! Are you sure he's not dead too? :)(And are you a pheasant plucker John? I think we should be told!)
Comment is about Ken Dodd's Dad's Dog's Dead (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Mon 28th Mar 2011 17:23
Another maritime cracker. Phil. Once more, very powerful final lines
Comment is about FULL ASTERN. (blog)
Mon 28th Mar 2011 16:06
The Sale open-mic was last Monday I'm afraid.
Sorry to hear that you've been ill and sorry that you missed it.
The next one is Tuesday 26th April.
Hope to see you there,
Comment is about Rod Tame (poet profile)
Original item by Rod Tame
Marianne Louise Daniels
Mon 28th Mar 2011 15:17
thanks for the spelling mistake Ray! I am terrible with the comma also, I get rather tangled up with punctuation sometimes...
I am going to keep that 'of', I like the way that line draws out. So stubborn! Sorry!
Thankyou for the pointers.
Mon 28th Mar 2011 15:10
The language bubbles, it always does and the rhymes and near-rhymes are sweet.I could have done with a few less commas, particularly commas before "and".
the places gnawed, between the faces
and rewards, of one of the faces
But the space is what lest report,
Do you need "of" one of the faces? Does that make sense? That last line takes some unravelling too.
lacy, not lacey.
Mon 28th Mar 2011 14:22
Hi Ray - fascinating study about the ongoing effects of alcohol - entices the reader in wanting to know more about the person and the purpose - or is this just a typical student having bad hair day
Comment is about The Student (blog)
Mon 28th Mar 2011 14:18
Hi Marianne - enjoyed all of this - particularly the third stanza and poignancy of the long winter statement at the end x
Mon 28th Mar 2011 11:47
I also thought of an incestuous connection.
With the others - I like this a lot, don't trash it.
Why do you bother writing all of those poems if you're never going to hone any of them? Just curious. If you're going to the bother of writing them, wouldn't you want them to be the best they can be?
Cynthia Buell Thomas
Mon 28th Mar 2011 11:32
Rod, when is the Sale open-mic? I had today in mind, but apparently not; at least no blurb about it. I've been ill. Have I missed some info?
Mon 28th Mar 2011 11:00
Outstanding, Graham, a heart-grabber from start to finish with its universal appeal to aging and recognition of our parents in ourselves. Superb enigmatic title. The images themselves are novel, and the choice of diction very apt, from the superb 'hanging cheeks' age-idea to the cruelty of time passing in the 'staccato baton of a squirrel's tail', and the almost-resented Spring in the final line with its 'pink white gauze of the hawthorn bloom'. The poem is left on a memory and a wish - past, present and future - a poignant, pointless wish. IMO, this poem pulses with its own life/identity, the epitome of poetry.
Comment is about Face to Face (blog)
Original item by Graham Sherwood
Mon 28th Mar 2011 08:09
good stuff kealan.. one of your best i think. been in ireland the amount of times i have been over the past few years, i am well used to rain and storms so can really see this - lol.
get submitting this around M8.
Comment is about How Can god Be When Spring Rains (blog)
Original item by Kealan Coady
Mon 28th Mar 2011 07:45
Thank you for reminding us of the beauty and vibrance 'of tiny talk.'
Comment is about Tiny Talk (blog)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Mon 28th Mar 2011 07:32
Thanks you so much Cynthia for reading and sharing your journey with the poems I am posting up. You are much appreciated.
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Sun 27th Mar 2011 23:47
Thanks for having a look at Out of Season, David. I don't think it's particularly successful because it's too personal, and that restricts it, although I'm fond of it, because of what it means to me. Your poems are better at communicating, one thought leading to another, giving them movement. They flow.
Comment is about David Cooke (poet profile)
Original item by David Cooke
Sun 27th Mar 2011 23:26
Sorry for the belated response - I've been browning my belly in Spain for the past week.
Thanks for your thoughts on I Dreamt You Were Little Again.
(Still no joy with the elastic!)
Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)
Original item by Elaine
Sun 27th Mar 2011 23:24
Sorry for the belated response - I've been browning my belly in Fuengirola.
Thanks for your comments on I Dreamt You Were Little Again.
Comment is about Alison Smiles (poet profile)
Original item by Alison Smiles
Sun 27th Mar 2011 19:39
Ah Requium for a Renaud eh? What chance do they have on our roads. Nice poem Ann saw it a bit late in the day though x
Comment is about foxheart (blog)
Sun 27th Mar 2011 17:33
Hi Cynthia and David many thanks for your kind and appreciated comments x
Comment is about JACOB’S LADDER. (blog)
Sun 27th Mar 2011 17:28
Hi David - many thanks for taking the time to read and comment on Jacob's Ladder - do appreciate the kind words
Sun 27th Mar 2011 16:53
Hi Philipos I'm trying to catch up with many excellent recent posts on WOL. I like this one for the immediacy of of its powerful imagery and its solid construction.
Sun 27th Mar 2011 16:46
A touching poem Ann. Reminds me I haven't seen our garden fox for quite a while.
Sun 27th Mar 2011 16:34
Yes, Cynthia, You did pretty well with the words you were given. Personally, I hate writing workshops. Just can't write to order - maybe wish I could have a go, but I can't!
Comment is about zone (blog)
Sun 27th Mar 2011 16:31
Very perky, Cynthia! LIke the playful use of rhyme. Clever, too, of Greg to remind us all of Hardy's great poem!
Sun 27th Mar 2011 16:29
Hi Cyntiha Good to hear from you again and glad you liked The Railway House. I've taken the opportunity to to check out this piece which I find very powerful and moving. David
Comment is about Trilogy of Heroes (blog)
Sun 27th Mar 2011 15:46
Hi Cynthia - many thanks for commenting on Jacob's Ladder and especially for taking time to unwrap the various layers of allegory x
Sun 27th Mar 2011 15:37
Hi Cynthia - (When Man Has Gone) I am not sure why I arrived at a ten-toed foot other than to demonstrate an alternative form - I have responded in some depth on this and really appreciate your views. Thanks for commenting in such depth x
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