Real love is life threatening 

It’s not serene, sweet, dream love

It’s not romantic, rainbow love

No

True love is torture 

Gut wrenching pain

Hands and knees, love 

Need it to breathe, love 

It’s enough to put you away, love 

But never pull you away, love 

It’s masochistically addictive 

It titillates and irritates

Possesses every bit 

Until you have a fit

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We murdered our dog today.

Or at least that’s how it feels.
We say it’s for the best.
We say he’s suffering.
But, it feels like a pointless death.

He ran into the vets office.
A Good Boy with cancer.
He tripped twice, bumping a wall,
and peed for the last time.

What did he think as he went inside?

Did he trust us to heal him?

Every day is a new day to a dog,
even when they su...

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Although she was beautiful

her struggle never seemed to fade.

With roots as strong as hers she would always smile

even when her petals were plucked and frayed. 

Remember how her beauty glowed 

as she faced the sun with grace.

Half laughing, half crying 

somehow she bloomed from her pain. 

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i never imagined living to this age 

and maybe that’s why it all feels so surreal 

the younger version of me lost hope so quickly 

i never planned to reach this day 

i don’t want to celebrate 

i don’t want to blow out any candles 

or open any gifts

i want to feel better 

i’m spending the couple nights before i turn twenty relapsing alone in a cold room 

there is nothing ...

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When she folded into herself

You all looked away

When she unraveled

You all watched

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The husbands

Of the divorced women

Drinking and watching the girls

Sitting with their dates

With legs apart in short skirts

Evenings of the lonely men

Strolling behind lazy women

Watching the rhythm of the buttocks…

Often narrate the same story again

And again, without any pause

The husbands, lonely or alone

With or without glasses in hands

Remain dru...

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What does anyone know of my rebelliousness,

my tears of blood,

of the wounds of my thoughts?

What does anyone know

if my heart is a dreary and deep space,

if it is perfect or imperfect,

or a chaos of mirages?

What does anyone know

if my weeping has long strands,

whether my days are electric or serene,

or if I live an autumn of orphanhood?

Does anyone...

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don't hide from gleams of wings

or shudder at the vision of veils,

fitful as glances days leak away

against woe a churchyard pales

there's a woman lives next door

Sadie claims she's from Berlin

in her dustbin I found a badge

a Nazi emblem with a gold pin

she seems to live at a low ebb

one not noted for her candour

says her daughter got adopted

I listen, t...

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Will the storm ever pass          

and will this one be the last?          

Will my becalmed and tethered mind          

remember the debris flying past?

I wished that I was of the earth          

compatible with green growth          

not expelling water and air          

I wished that I was not a fire.

That I could be earthly bound,

my words be made of clay

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The world is sadist, just look around.

Their smile on your success are distorted around.

Their empathy on your failure are so hollow,
I can do bungee-jumping if were near around.

It's so exciting when you are rock bottom, they can hardly wait to **¢k you around.

Making you feel like trash at every minor problem, now you have a new house.. see that dustbin around.

If you think no on...

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Tinnitus

Tinnitus shrieking day and night

Keeps me up, keeps me uptight

A high-pitched squeal

A constant Eeeeeee

A passing Jet

A Kettle of Tea

Crickets in the Forest

Cicadas in the trees

All screeching together

Like metal on pavement

Sure you can go

And do what you do

Don’t be bored

Don’t let it get to you

Sometimes it is alright

...

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Pain

Mental - Physical - Emotional 

Pain 

No words can describe pain

No medicine can help pain

Mental - Physical - Emotional 

Pain 

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You're a steady stream of bad choices waiting to happen.

The eye of the storm, or the calm before it?
What's the difference?
It's going to ruin you anyway.
You're a constant trickle of water, wanting to make noise but too scared to do it.
Because you're a puppet controlled by strings.
Water controlled by the trap.

I wish my life was like a game show where you press the buzzer and you're...

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With gloom I express what I can, 

not to do so will cause the demise of my soul;

sadness lacerates me like a dancing whip

To describe the incomprehensible in words is not easy,

to explain it is complicated,

to make it understandable is more difficult

People are slowly eliminated,

they agonize on a cross that has been erected for them;

hunger and disease spreads

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I hear the hounds whine. The dust rises as they stomp and claw the dirt before me. Eyes made of moonlight and their breath, the stench of pain. I am no longer their mistress. Forsaken them for a heart. Oh wretched beasts forgive me. Allow me one more day's light above the shadows.

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A heart full of hurt, wanting to unleash pain 

A heart not strong enough to endure all

But I find solace in our times together

I give that which I can't get, I have what I can't give,

Our moments gives me nothing but peace

Did you regret it?

A knowable answer 

Was it worth it?

A question never asked

But I find hope in my love.

I know nothing will change

Nevertheles...

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You are going soon

Going far away

Your bags are in the car

Your plane leaves at dawn

But you tell me 'don't be sad'

You are still here today

And that's the thing about going--

It means you're not yet gone

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"Give children fire, so they can grow stronger than anyone you've ever known"


Take me to the edge
Give me wings to touch the sky
Let me hustle my sorrow into the wind
May my pain echo in a kind
Might it set their world on fire
Tears pumping through their veins
Let them know what I've felt
What ache I've been in
And they'll heal as soon as their own wind whisper hits 'em
As a hurrican...

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I hurt for you,

Then, now, and my whole life through.

I hurt for him, her and the next,

For last time and this time, I’m a motherfuckin wreck.

No body knows that shit but me,

That this butterfly ain’t as free as she’d like to be.

I’ve lived this way,

It’s why I sway and sway,

I dance, in a trance, 

In the dark, feel the expanse. 

I've never had a choice,

But I’ve l...

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When you left, you took a piece of my heart

When you left, my whole world came tumbling down

I became so lost

I was left in the dark

You took with you my light 

When you left, I learned to fight

I learned to navigate this world without you by my side

I learned to be strong to no longer rely on your love

You thought I was weak,

For feeling too much

Now, you're the one ...

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Father's fell in the ages of stones ,

Then I was given names by companions .

In me there grew a pain none could see ,

As I watched back in the days ,

Others were bought Christmas gifts ,

While I sat back ,with burning wishes 

I recall slowly ,the path itself was a war 

With that little hope I grew, daily.

Everyday storms would sneak in the little shelter that Momma gav...

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Close the door to all the pain
It will not help you.

Shut out all the rage
It will exhaust you.

Think your thoughts again
But try not to descend
Into turmoil.

Because you've so much to do
To ease your mind.

And how you'll do it
To decide.

And if you're going to begin
You can only do it
One thought at a time. 
 

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What is it that attracts us to other human being so much we can’t breathe?

What is that gate to heaven and hell?

What is it that attracts me to you?

Smile.

Pain.

Mutual confusion.

Eyes in the dark, like reindeers in headlights. About to live?

What was life? What was all that fear and anger? Sweat, trembling, catching breath so hopelessly.

So hopelessly lost in you. Forever.

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SMASH!

Every time the glass of your skull

Crashes into the fist of another memory

To crush you where you stand

Because another memory has broken you

Because another memory has entered you

Like intruders, they force their way inside

They punch their way into your attention

They invade your heart

Until you must look at them

All so that they can violate you again

They...

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"You have been here a few days now",

"Since Saturday", she replied

"And why did you come in here?"

"Because I attempted suicide"

She didn't have any worries,

She wasn't sad or happy,

It was blank, emotionless state,

Nothing to do, nothing got her interest,

Now been quite a few time living through this noiseless rhyme,

It was like a vegetative state, living in her mi...

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Painful embers stab the dark

Of pain too rich to bear

Callous flames, beguile a heart

Left stained by acrid air

Dreams denied by rancid thoughts

On lips too vain to care

Lifetimes lost in frozen eyes

A soul beyond repair

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Climb the steps, one by one

Feel the breeze refresh me

Hands can nearly touch the sun

Golden rays drip down around me 

Love and splendour encases my heart

With the world shining out all its glory

A brand new day, a glimmering start

New beginnings, new days, new story

Top of the slide, secure on the mat

Fluttering lungs fill up with excitement

The world whizz...

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Days began and nights would turn

Through endless cycles of despair

The living dream, compelled by hope,

Carried away and lost in ethereal life. 

Shattered byways that led to want and love

Broken by lies and embittered deceit

With the emptiness rotting inside. 

Frustration abounded and sank In my heart

Fulfilment seemed to slip through fingers

As the quicksand o...

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Stay with me dont leave me in this dark valley 

Lay on my emotions pet them tell them it can all go away

Everytime im sleepless i have images of our times coming and going

Eventually youll walk in that fire and understand the burning 

Peoplw will walk in an ember from hell just to find out where your going

Will we fall to our senses and stumble down lonely park drive 

I see the s...

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