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To Smoke Before Bedtime

 At dinner for a start,

I ate a very fresh coconut.

Fearing my stomach upset

Ate a nice vinaigrette,

Then I ate a cake,

My mother baked.

To prevent constipation,

And for good digestion,

Rare sort of cheese I ate.

I ate a banana for a bet.

And to avoid the gases,

I ate some hens with lettuce.

To have a very deep sleep

I ate a very cheap sheep.

Smoked nicely...

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Another Grumpy Sunday

It’s another grumpy Sunday

Zoe’s late picking up Grandad

And the chicken is nearly done.

I’ve got my feet up watching the race

And shouts are heard in the kitchen

Where I haven’t dared to show my face


It’s another grumpy Sunday

And I haven’t even decanted the wine.

I’ve had to put the race on record

As I’ve been told to set the table

But everything is rosy,


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