Poetry Blogs (Humour)

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A Pig Went Quack

A pig went quack with a Monkey on his back while watching an Elephant juggle,
a Tiger passing by in his plane was flying high and a laughing Rhino started blowing bubbles,
a Gorilla started baking the pie that he'd been making as a Billy Goat was brushing his hair,
and a Crocodile was painting a Zebra who was skating while eating a big ripe juicy pear!

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A Monkey Wore Pink Lipstick

A Monkey wore pink lipstick
as he laughed and baked a cake
and was followed round the kitchen by a disco dancing snake, 
they were joined by a Rhino who was wearing underpants, shuffling his bum and joining in the dance,
then there came a Chicken who was roaring like a bear as and a skateboarding Elephant with long curly hair. 

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Humourkidsnonsensesilly poem

Far Cough

entry picture

 

People must not cough near you

they must cough far away

If you hear someone coming

Tell them to...

 

 

 

 

FAR COUGH ! 

              

           Po.   24/03/2020

 

 

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Size Matters!

Size Matters!

 

Jack and Jill were getting wed.

(Jack’s dad thought, Jill was nice).

“But, let me give you, Son,” he said

“some fatherly advice.

 

On the day, I wed yer mam

I nipped ‘er straight indoors.

And, being ‘t sort of bloke I am

I soon laid down the laws.

 

I boldly took mi trousers off

and told ‘er, ‘put ‘em on.’

She drowned within a sea of cloth

...

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A 'Valued' Friend!

A 'Valued' Friend!

 

Frank, tonight, is working late.

The doorbell rings; it’s Frankie’s mate.

“Liz, you need to know”, smiles Ken.

“Frank won’t be home ‘til half-past ten.

 

I said, I’d drop in, as I pass,

to tell you of his news, alas.”

“It’s nice of you to think of me.”

Beams Lizzy, “Would you like some tea?”

 

And so they share a brew and chat;

some thoug...

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funny poemsfunny versehumorous poemsHumorous versehumour

The Trouble With Nuts!

The Trouble With Nuts!

 

The trouble with nuts is, they’re very elusive.

But, don’t take my word as completely conclusive.

It’s just that, it seems, though, whenever they're freed

they scatter and hide - which is not what you need!

 

Consider the case of a doctor, I knew.

Took his car for a spin ( and to ‘pose’ in it, too).

A well-mannered man - but you wouldn’t think th...

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A 'Snitch' in Time!

A ‘Snitch’, in Time !

 

My mother’s mother, Granny Brown

was ‘muchly-loved’, (once) in our town.

The care she gave; her happy ways.

She cheered us in her ‘ember days’.

 

She liked to knit but not to sell.

Such quality. (oh, you could tell!)

Each item, thoroughly bespoke

- for giving to specific folk.

 

“Gran, that’s great !” i’d often shout.

“You knit them th...

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She's Snow White

Not So White 

Little Snow White's daddy died 
Pretty girl cried and cried
Wicked Queen an ugly old tart 
Sent huntsman to take her heart

Huntsman took Snow for a ride 
But felt ever so guilty inside
Snow looked up and made her plea Huntsman said, ‘Go now! Be free’

He took his knife; he lit a cig 
Then cut heart out of a pig
Snow White ran he felt good 
She tripped over piece of wo...

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