The Nobel Prize for Lies
I want the Nobel Prize
The one they give for Peace
I want the Nobel Prize
So give it to me please
It’s not that I’m needy,
Ignorant, profane
It’s just I need an ego massage
Now and again
Give me that fucking prize
It shouldn’t be a drama
You gave it Jimmy Carter, Mandela and Obama
Give me the prize
I’m feeling Presidential
Or I’ll push the nuclear button
With implications existential
Then you’ll all be laughing on the far side of your face
At the swift annihilation of the entire human race
So give me the Nobel Peace Prize
You know that it makes sense
Or you’ll all have to deal with the distressing consequence
OK said the committee you can have a Nobel Prize
But not for being a peacemaker, You’re not Tutu in disguise
You’re not Kissinger or Luther King
You’re not even Al Gore
So what the fuck are you giving me the Nobel Prize for?
It’s Not for Peace or literature
Nor chemistry, physics, medicine
Ghandi never got one, nor did Thomas Alva Edison
But you deserve a Nobel Prize
Not for wearing those too-long ties
Nor for being excessively good or wise
Nor failing to keep zipped your flies
Here’s your Nobel Prize
It’s the Nobel Prize - for Lies.
Auracle
Fri 1st Aug 2025 11:36
Disappointing, isn't it?
'Here lies the human race. Yes, we lied, right to your face.'
Gen-next will use the factchecks