Hello Cynthia, in the end the prisoner lost the plot.

Comment is about Babies (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Love the lines
'I roam the history of our making
Trying to find a gem of remembrance...'
I also like the picture of the couple who do not seem to be looking at the shooting star which sets the poem.

Thanks also for the kind words on 'In Llanfairpwllgwyngyll' Jean.

Comment is about ESTRANGED (blog)

Original item by jean lucy thompson

Have gone through your work....i must say am impressd. It is just ...i like it: 'Your Chair' i love it

Comment is about David Cooke (poet profile)

Original item by David Cooke

She held herself stil'....i like it:

Comment is about Tommy Carroll (poet profile)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

Tommy thanks: This is just my fevourite. In kenya most culture believe that a woman is to serve her man and nothing more.

I wanted to bring out the picture of a woman who has dreams too. A woman who wants to be free. A woman who wants to be something in the society and gain respect just like the men. A woman who wants to have something of her own and be proud of.

Am glad i did. Thank you.I will keep writting

Comment is about vanessaorina (poet profile)

Original item by vanessaorina

Cynthia, thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment :) The box is all about fear. As human beings, we will always be fighting fear: our own comfort zones and other peoples' expectations of us...our own box, their box and society's box. This line is actually a proclamation: I've learned that fear is relentless but have decided to not let it beat me. It's also a warning to others: don't let fear make its home inside your heart. I see that maybe this line doesn't really flow but thought it essential to break free from tidiness in form. Hence the cry: don't put me inside your box ;)

Comment is about Don't Put Me in Your Box (blog)

Original item by Candice Reineke

Beautiful imagery, deep meaning!

Comment is about The Awakening (blog)

Original item by Twilbury Wist

Hi Vanessa :) ''A Woman In Diamonds'' exposes something I have never known. Your words educate, your words expose desire and frustration in a unique way. Write more- write often. :) Tommy

Comment is about vanessaorina (poet profile)

Original item by vanessaorina

Thanks alot for those encouraging words: I will keep writing. Expect to see more soon.

Comment is about PAGES OF MY LIFE (blog)

Original item by vanessaorina

I like this too. Excellent ideas neatly expressed. I'm not sure how stanza 5 works; it eludes me completely.

Comment is about Don't Put Me in Your Box (blog)

Original item by Candice Reineke

Sweat tight nylon glue
zig zag double yellow
that's a cheeky chap
who flashed bare flesh
slow down make room
misty mirror spoilt view.

Comment is about Motoring over to Marsden - a Little Treat! (blog)

Original item by Maggie Waker

Lines 'equal in length' regardless of rhyme pattern is a different idea; but I don't pack a pistil.

Comment is about THE SMALL HOURS (re-post). (blog)

I myself do not pay much attention to how my lines break off. It just sort of happens that way; it sounds that way in my head.

I actually do not read much poetry outside of a few favorite poets, so the only poem that has any relation to a guitar that comes to my mind is The Guitar by Federico Lorca. But in that there is nothing about blue.

Comment is about from the other side of the garage door (blog)

Original item by Pity-Poetry

appreciate your sharing of this sad poem Paul,you have my deepest sympathy.x

Comment is about The Journey (blog)

Original item by Paul Letch

Keep writing, pouring on to paper your soul, sorting out your thoughts. These are strong, clear emotions shared by all women. Find the real beauty and vitality expressed in these words of yours, and develop them into one great theme, or many individual themes. The poetic drive is there, the scope and the 'killing details' poets alone seem to really see and understand.

I hope you will share more thoughts in days to come.

I just realized: How nice of you to add a comment to my profile. Thank you.

Comment is about PAGES OF MY LIFE (blog)

Original item by vanessaorina

awww,I can feel the pain in this poem Jean.Cheer up chuck,tomorrow is another story as they say-whoever THEY are...<0><0>...x

Comment is about ESTRANGED (blog)

Original item by jean lucy thompson

Poignant 'first leaf', leaving the reader to write the 'story'. One can only presume that the plot is the opposite of 'nurture'.

Comment is about Babies (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Great poem great place :)

Comment is about IN LLANFAIRPWLLGWYNGYLL (blog)

Original item by Daniel Dwyran

I really like this poem. It travels through your 'moment/s in time' really well, catching the particular observations of a child with that clarity when conniving. I like the spread of associations filling out the 'story'. It is full of small, deliberate details to flesh out the scene, and to expand the portrait of the child within her family relationships.

I'm not sure why the poetry lines break as given. I haven't been able to apply any reason for them at all; my mind-reading skills here are zilch.

Somebody has a famous 'blue guitar string' line, or something close to that. Wallace Stevens jumps to mind, but I'm not sure. Any idea?

Comment is about from the other side of the garage door (blog)

Original item by Pity-Poetry

First the thoughts and then the words - thank goodness. Many poets work the reverse - and fail dismally.

Comment is about The Awakening (blog)

Original item by Twilbury Wist

The Armed Forces have been the salvation of many an aimless life. Perhaps it serves to balance
the need to take life in the name of the country?
I recall the late Sir Norman Wisdom recounting
how the Army had been his own saviour and gave
him security, comradeship, discipline and purpose.
He went on to become one of our greatest slapstick
comedians as well as a fine singer, but he never
forgot the debt he owed to his time in the British Army.

Comment is about Zero to Hero (blog)

Original item by Tj Steele

Have read your samples and am just...i mean i like how you let it flow: i love your writtings

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Helen
As a child rainbows always facinated me.
There was the rain and the mist... there was the sunlight... but where was the rainbow if they exist?
Magical. We all seek to find the rainbow and the rainbows end.
Nice one.

Comment is about Rainbow (blog)

Hi Paul
A very touching and moving poem here. Thank you for sharing this.
May you find your inner peace.

Daniel

Comment is about The Journey (blog)

Original item by Paul Letch

It is money that allegedly makes the world go round and common decency and humility forgotten.
A very good take on this.
I also found that your poem 'Headache' gave me a great big smile.

Comment is about Secret to Success (blog)

Original item by James Roper

Graham Sherwood am very greatfull for the warm welcome : I will do so as you said

Comment is about vanessaorina (poet profile)

Original item by vanessaorina

Hello Vanessorina

Welcome to Write Out Loud.
I hope you enjoy the site. We're really looking forward to reading some of your work and I know that you will be warmly welcomed by other WOL-ers too.

If you haven’t already added a picture to your profile please try and do so. It’s good to see what our fellow poets look like.

Have a good browse around, there’s lots going on and if you have the time to make some comments about the work of other poets please feel free. It’s the best way to get some constructive feedback about your own work too.
There’s always someone who’ll help you out with a problem, so just ask and someone will get back to you. It’s a friendly place, so welcome once again.

Graham Sherwood

Comment is about vanessaorina (poet profile)

Original item by vanessaorina

Missed you at the end of the rainbow.

I thank you for your heartache and very kind words.

I had read some of your work just after posting the recent work of mine. I could not help but feel the sorrow, so eloquently written.

Shall I ever heal? It does not feel like it to me right now, but time may lessen the pain.

Kind regards

Paul

Comment is about Rainbow (blog)

In loving memory of Anthony age 34.

Comment is about The Journey (blog)

Original item by Paul Letch

Thank you for your kind comment about my poem
"Arromanches".

Comment is about Shirley-Anne Kennedy (poet profile)

Original item by Shirley-Anne Kennedy

Excellent.

Comment is about ARROMANCHES - a Re-post of Remembrance for 2014 (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

I guess it depends on the objective of the "workshop." I have attended and led a few in my time - with the objective of helping to inspire attendees to write something they are happy with. Hammering out the rights and wrongs, dos and don'ts of poetry is an entirely different matter, and comes down in the end to personal opinion.
I would suggest that "Adlestrop" does fairly precisely what Thomas intended it to do - record a precise moment in time and place for posterity. I can see the point in studying the poem as an exercise, and even discussing how other writers might approach the task, but "improving" it seems to hover somewhere between a mild arrogance and plagiarism by subtle alteration.
An experience which comes to mind was after a dinner party many years ago, when, after listening to a long diatribe from a self-styled expert on house-plant cultivation (yes, it was that kind of dinner party) for more than an hour, one guest paused thoughtfully before posing the question "If you're so clever then tell me, why aren't you f*****g rich?"
Is it OK to "crit" something that, by any standard has stood the test of time and impose our own modern wisdoms and idioms on it? Should we all head to the Louvre armed with our paints and brushes because we feel that we could give La Gioconda a more pleasing smile? Or, should we concentrate (certain of our abilities) on creating something original, inspired and lasting of our own? Is there any merit in the well-used adage that "Those who can do, those who can't teach"?

Regards,
A.E.

Comment is about Did Edward Thomas get it right? Or could 'Adlestrop' be improved? (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Personally I'm pleased. It's about time a publisher & promoter of adventurous poetry got some decent funding. It's little enough compared to opera. They do good books (Adventures in Form is fun.)

Comment is about Poetry publisher Penned in the Margins wins £135,000 grant from Arts Council (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Lol!x

Comment is about Headache (blog)

Original item by James Roper

Very touching poem Ian.
Had to read and revisit a couple of times to get the full gist but that was just me wanting to take it all in.
The hissing gas lamp a trigger factor for the anti-gas drills causing a flashback and the mind invasion.. the empty chair in the chapel photo and the relation to the last verse.
Great work indeed and food for thought.

Comment is about Craiglockhart (Not Yet Diagnosed Nervous) (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

I really enjoyed this poem, says a lot in a very clever way!

Comment is about Letters and Chops (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

I love this, Cynthia, I agree that it says so much in so few words, and indeed, what is a woman to think?

Comment is about Letters and Chops (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Hi Ian, I agree with Laura, this is a great poem, very moving, well done.

Comment is about Craiglockhart (Not Yet Diagnosed Nervous) (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

Reminds me of Adlestrop.
I liked Old Men, by the way.
Dom.

Comment is about FREQUENCIES. (blog)

Having been accused of being a troll amongst
other things for my posts, I am pleasantly
surprised to find concurring views on the subject
of the financial support for poetry.
WOL is a good example of a shop window for
poetry and we can contribute voluntarily to it
IF we wish to. I have never seen it mentioned
but somehow I doubt if WOL receives an Arts
Council (or any other) subsidy for its admirable
online endeavours. It is as deserving as any
other enterprise in this area of interest.

Comment is about Poetry publisher Penned in the Margins wins £135,000 grant from Arts Council (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Yes, I have read the workshopped Adlestrop, Adlestrop Corrected. The title is not warranted, the poem being neither funny nor correct: willowherb can't be transposed into willows, herbs, it just looks bloody ignorant.

Comment is about Did Edward Thomas get it right? Or could 'Adlestrop' be improved? (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

yes, what of the social pariahs, vampires, zombies, cyborgs, robots all, and whoremongers too, prattling rabble-rousers, fat-bellied mutants, grotesques, vain popinjays, swillers of vile excrement, in your cess-pools of self-torment, fawning sycophants, eager slanderers, blind worms masquerading as accusers, slaughterers, self-deceivers and plain idiots. Gross hypocrites besmirched in ignorance and vituperous righteousness, languishing in the pits of obsession and abomination, cacophonous litigations, flatulent piety, and putrefaction in an empty stomach. Oh ravenous vermin breeding in the contemptible proclivities and aberrations of your puerile soul-less existence. Traitors, spawn of mammon, scheming pilferers, beasts of iniquity and self-love, butchers of babes, adherents of duplicity, mendacity and sloth. Barbarous slaves and jackals of immorality vomiting on the heads of disembodied slugs. Political charlatans, rapacious villains, crooks and thieves. Scurrilous stinkards, tawdry delusionists, gross imbeciles, tattered ragged woe-begots, beggars of lost hopes and empty faiths. Pernicious quacks, bullies, tyrants, and ungracious toads.

Comment is about Malefic Condescension: Disavowed Homeless Dust II (blog)

Original item by Juton, Villain of Truth

A great take on the start of the Worlds greatest cycle race Tommy. Captures the loneliness and adrenaline rush of the cyclist to the heartbeat.

Comment is about Tour de France The Grand Depart (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

Hi Dan Glad that there's at least one afficionado out there to dig my jazz vignettes. I was mulling over this one at The Cleethorpes Jazz weekend. Charlie didn't make it - for obvious reasons! - but still a fgood time was had by all!

Comment is about Daniel Dwyran (poet profile)

Original item by Daniel Dwyran

Following my previous post, I have now read the
"workshop" version elsewhere.
Sorry, but it could have been part of a report
from a provincial newspaper about a delayed
train!
If this is "teaching" poetry today, then I will
excuse myself from its "words of wisdom".

Comment is about Did Edward Thomas get it right? Or could 'Adlestrop' be improved? (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

You need certain attributes when writing
poetry/verse.
The humanity to communicate with humanity.
A grasp of grammar and spelling.
An imagination.
An innate sense of rhythm.
And a sense of whether something works - or not,
and that includes breaking the so-called rules.
You can't "teach" anyone to write poetry...
any more than you can teach anyone to write song lyrics.
You either have it in you or you don't and
this can be helped by extensive reading and listening, plus learning by comparison.
As for the simple pleasures in "Adlestrop" -
a poem of time and place and human sensibility,
if it ain't broke, why try to fix it?

Comment is about Did Edward Thomas get it right? Or could 'Adlestrop' be improved? (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

The difference between the sexes in a nutshell!
"Would a man think that or make a fuss?
Or would he not? If not...discuss."
:-)

Comment is about Letters and Chops (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Cheers for all for your very kind words on this. It is much appreciated.

It just shows to me how important comments can be. Inspiration and ideas can be sparked like a Ray Mears campfire from a kind comment.
This was the catalyst needed for the creation of Habitat Hippy.

Thank you.

Comment is about HABITAT HIPPY (blog)

Original item by Daniel Dwyran

Glad you liked 'Smelly Bogs.. and Habitat Hippy' and thanks for reading. Your comments were very welcome.

I meant what I said about your poem 'Today in Taiji' and I don't think a news correspondent could have done better.

Comment is about Shirley-Anne Kennedy (poet profile)

Original item by Shirley-Anne Kennedy

Well done, Tom. Greatly deserved. Looking forward to seeing the programme you deliver.

Comment is about Poetry publisher Penned in the Margins wins £135,000 grant from Arts Council (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman