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As I bask in the sun
The rain starts to fall
Droplets find the ground like silver
I am filled with childish wonder
Awaiting the magic, it appears
The colours bring my world
To life
My sky awakens
To excite me from within
I seek to find my utopia
Not for the riches of wealth
Only for the affirmation
Of magic
Are you looking for me?
You will find me at the end of the rainbow
this is a very well written poem......reads very nice good flow.....i dont want to offer constructive criticism...as there is nothing here really to criticise..THIS POEM IS FANTASTIC....but id just like to offer a new outlook viewpoint to the poem if thats ok...why not experiment...from point of view of child ...let your imagination run free and wild...i think it would be worth exploring a more fantasy-like magical perception of the weather, rainbow. ..as i think there is alot of potential in this poem...and just needs extending a little....contrast the dull gloomy rain storm to all the vibrant colours...birds singing...sun beams transform silver to gold...kinda like think of WIZARD OF OZ SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW...when she goes to munchkin land...but before that..there was black and white movie......try to achieve that effect
Helen
As a child rainbows always facinated me.
There was the rain and the mist... there was the sunlight... but where was the rainbow if they exist?
Magical. We all seek to find the rainbow and the rainbows end.
Nice one.
Missed you at the end of the rainbow.
I thank you for your heartache and very kind words.
I had read some of your work just after posting the recent work of mine. I could not help but feel the sorrow, so eloquently written.
Shall I ever heal? It does not feel like it to me right now, but time may lessen the pain.
Kind regards
Paul
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Tommy Carroll
Mon 21st Jul 2014 22:24
oops I've just seen...