Yay - at last we have lift off! Thanks for writing such an epic piece Rachel - I would have taken me several seasons to have written anything like this.

Your poem has had me googling like crazy cos I like to try to get my head round references a poet makes and I've now learnt one new word and a scientific fact!

I love the religious connotations that run throughout and the way you go from the personal to the universal.

Your thoughts at the end are not obvious - I'm guessing you are saying that man makes too much of himself. We seek to identify with the specialness of the whale - when in fact the whale is superior, unique - Christ like, I suppose...

'Till the echo rounds the curve' is a great line to finish with - it leaves so much for us to ponder on.

I love the ideas in this. x

Comment is about whalesong (blog)

Original item by Rachel Bond

really liked this isobel..inspired my write. hope you like.

i love the all and the nothing and the ocean inbetween :) good writing x

Comment is about The Lonely Whale (blog)

Original item by Isobel

a first draft..more for the enjoyment than competition although if you do all vote me king of the whales i will be pleased :)

Comment is about whalesong (blog)

Original item by Rachel Bond

Thanks v much. I'm new to the site, but I'm keen to improve and get my poems out there.

Comment is about Mike Morris (poet profile)

Original item by Mike Morris

We all know folks like the Perfects! Are you new to Write Out Loud? I like all the samples and it's a rare thing I like a football poem!

Comment is about Mike Morris (poet profile)

Original item by Mike Morris

I enjoyed this very much, Jonnie, good one.

Comment is about For A Second I Forgot (blog)

Original item by Jonnie Falafel

I really liked this poem. Moving.

Comment is about Lost Letter, Found (blog)

Original item by Tom

This is a great poem, Isobel, love it. I think Ian is right, a shame you can't enter your own competition ;-) Lx

Comment is about The Lonely Whale (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Good one, Yvonne, enjoyed. x

Comment is about Old Age (blog)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton

I like the idea of this, and enjoyed it, Thom, good one.

Comment is about Lost Letter, Found (blog)

Original item by Tom

A charming tribute to a place of fond memory! However -
It's nice to know Yorkshire still has its way,
Cos I'm used to meeting Yorkies in Torbay!

Comment is about Filey (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Hmmm. I'll leave it at that!

Comment is about Old Age (blog)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton

Always good to see stimulating thought flowering on WOL! Many a "weed" has been found to have qualities for use in medicine and diet. Personally, I find myself rebelling at the manicure mentality that manifests itself in many gardens but especially in public parks.
"I resent the imposed impertinence that decreed
The difference and value defining flower and weed!"

Comment is about COMMONALITY (blog)

Original item by Ian Gant

Thanks very much to the Poetry24 website for publishing this last week. Check out what they do if you haven't done already!

Comment is about Angelina (blog)

Original item by steve pottinger

Hello Solar, Yvonne and thanks for your comments. I have three jays now who come down to the bird table - well, there may be more than three, I have only ever seen three together at any one time! Solar, the "nothing special" comment was a sort of allusion to Matthew 10:29-30 - Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father, but the very hairs of your head are all numbered.

Comment is about Garrulus Glandarius (blog)

Original item by STEVE RUDD

Yep I like this too, sad and emotive

Comment is about The Lonely Whale (blog)

Original item by Isobel

he is nothing special...whhhattt!!
they are all soooo special,and thank goodness
for them all.Lovely poem Steve.

Can we have plenty more,please?x

Comment is about Garrulus Glandarius (blog)

Original item by STEVE RUDD

Thank you for your comments. I agree Rachel - the sea is epic! I do love the creatures of the deep - alien like pods floating around and then those terrifying angler fish!

I love the sea's permanance and the effect this has on our personal tides, making us return to it for reflection or adventure. You cannot walk by the sea for your mood not be altered somehow. These moments are my inspiration Jonnie.

Thank you for your time and comments.

Comment is about Treading Waters (blog)

Original item by Marianne Daniels

The story of my life. I'll say one word... Thesaurus.

Comment is about The Word Gremlin (blog)

Original item by David Lindsay

Thoroughly enjoyed, Isobel.
I especially like the alliteration of "sowed his knowledge to the seven silver seas"

Comment is about The Lonely Whale (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Excellent Ian,
I never know the difference between limbo and purgatory. Of course, your fun will end when she joins you!
Unlike Yvonne, I can never really enjoy rhymes around "wife/life/strife/knife". I think it's because options are few so you can see what's coming.
It didn't stop my overall enjoyment, though.

Comment is about Noticed (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

They say that a weed is simply a plant that you don't want.
I think there is an in-built futility associated with gardening; we cultivate and nurture stuff which is clearly at home in the Andean foothills or Japan but try to eliminate the stuff that clearly wants to be here like nettle and dock and dandelion.
But I think you've cornered a niche market in celebrating the glories of the dandelion, IG!

Comment is about COMMONALITY (blog)

Original item by Ian Gant

a great read. I like the 'flag- words ' ghost etc - at first one almost ignores them but one realises their import after the key line ' look for me...' 'Whilst stabbing at me with a nagging knife' - excellent line.

Comment is about Noticed (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

Ta G A man of taste and forthrightness. :o) Tommy

Comment is about George Stanworth (poet profile)

Original item by George Stanworth

Lovely idea well executed. I like the last verse where you are imitating the bird.

Comment is about Garrulus Glandarius (blog)

Original item by STEVE RUDD

Hello George,
Glad you enjoyed "Your First Hut is the Cheapest" and "Ikea". As you may have noticed I don't write much that is "worthy" but I do have several rather irreverent song parodies posted on the site.

Comment is about George Stanworth (poet profile)

Original item by George Stanworth

Hello RM,
Glad you liked my latest contribution to the cultural and literary encyclopaedia of sheds entitled, "Your First Hut is the Cheapest".

Comment is about Richie Muster (poet profile)

Original item by Richie Muster

hello Yvonne,
Glad you liked "Your First Hut is the Cheapest". Sheds seem to provide me with a lot of my inspiration, perhaps because I spend a lot of time in them doing nothing.

Comment is about Yvonne Brunton (poet profile)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton

Hello Lynn,
Thanks for commenting on "Your First Hut is the Cheapest". As it happens, my first hut is nearly 30 years old and is still going strong.

Comment is about Lynn Dye (poet profile)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Hello Ian,
Glad you liked "Your First Hut is the Cheapest".

Comment is about Ian Whiteley (poet profile)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

Hello Isobel,
Glad you liked "Your First Hut is the Cheapest".
I'm not much cop at "whole songs" because I'm not very melodically minded. The words come quite easily but I struggle with original tunes.
I did co-write a "serious" one for our village school which the kids do several times a year at various occasions (which is quite pleasing).

http://www.writeoutloud.net/public/blogentry.php?blogentryid=29354

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

hello Greg,
Glad you liked "Your First Hut is the Cheapest". My own favourite is PP Arnold's although Sheryl Crowe does a good one. Of course, nobody could have done them without the genius of Cat Stevens.

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Hello Tim,
Glad you liked "Your First Hut is the Cheapest". When I next get to PPP maybe I'll give it a go.

Comment is about Tim Ellis (poet profile)

Original item by Tim Ellis

Isobel Good `un!

I like the way the combination of the bulk of the whale plus the weight of the water and the resistance of the `push and pull` of the moon induced tides makes the whole thing so
strivingly heavy.

Also the way the body of the poem saps the sympathy out of the title`s` lonely` and satirises it.

Plus the neat little rhymed finisher.

Come to think of it, that `flat earth` `universal truth` and (slightly) religious connotation of`looking for the fall`, added to the upper-cased`NOTHING` could open the whole thing up to a robustly atheistic interpretation...(I`m wafflin`)

I`ve always thought that those great big hulkin` brutes were well big enough to save themselves.

Comment is about The Lonely Whale (blog)

Original item by Isobel

thanks for the comments and suggestions on 'noticed' Harry. The use of those 'eerie' words early on were deliberate, as I wanted to get across that this guy has lived the life of a ghost while he was alive - and wasn't noticed - it was only when he died that he became 'real'. You are, as usual, very perceptive and I totally get the idea that I could have built more tension at the end of the poem by using more neutral words early on and saving the sinister for later - so I guess I got caught between two stools of trying to get an eerie pay off against trying to get a subtle characterisation.
Thanks so much for taking the time to comment
much appreciated
Ian

Comment is about Harry O`N eill (poet profile)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

A clever adaption of a Villanelle-type style to get the intervolved connected `run` of the `story` of this (direct address) poem.

The lines about the wife are deadly, and the `story` is told clearly.

(I`m not sure if I`m right but - feeling that the `eerie` punch of the poem is from the line:`Look for me when the hour is getting late` I think that the words, `ghost` `ethereal` `chill` and `tomb` would be more omminously fitted into the last three stanzas than in the early `not noticed` section and replaced by annonymous words.)

Refreshingly clear and rhythmic poem.

Comment is about Noticed (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

thanks for the comment on 'deadly nightshade' Yvonne - yes, I liked the single line ending, which turns it from what appears to be a love poem into something more sinister - nice that you picked that up
cheers
Ian

Comment is about Yvonne Brunton (poet profile)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton

thanks f your comments on 'that which autumn....' harry, the short story wot i rote is very image rich and touches more on the background of the characters - it always read to me as though it could be condensed into a narrative poem and i enjoyed the exercise - cheers
Ian

Comment is about Harry O`N eill (poet profile)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

Thanks for the comment on The Trainers poem, Ian. My wife thinks I was on something when I wrote that one - still you have to go where the muse takes you!

Comment is about Ian Whiteley (poet profile)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

WOW! great poem Isobel - it's a shame you can't enter your own competition because this would have been very difficult to beat. Beautiful, haunting - lovely stuff
Ian

Comment is about The Lonely Whale (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Good stuff Katy - the opening line, inparticular, is a killer
Ian

Comment is about The Oak Tree III (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

Yvonne,
I know this one`s about me, but It`s no use postin` these little praise-poem tributes up to try and get round me.

I still don`t forgive you for preferrin` that young guitar - playin` troubador.

Comment is about Old Age (blog)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton

Many thanks harry, i think the endings have become something of a trademark.

Marcus

Comment is about Marcus Cooke (poet profile)

Original item by Marcus Cooke

enjoyed this poem Paul,very much.x

Comment is about Good Morning, Good Morning (blog)

Original item by Paul Sands

for me,this is so moving.x

Comment is about Peter Goes West (blog)

Original item by Jonnie Falafel

yep,agree with P&S comments(respectfully)x

Comment is about When Obama goes to bed (blog)

Original item by Wez Jefferies

made my sunday
start with a share
in your chucklings

Comment is about Parking (blog)

Original item by Dorinda MacDowell

cannot believe this beautiful poem
is without other comments Katy.

Please keep them coming.x

Comment is about The Oak Tree III (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

Thanks for commenting on my poem Yvonne. x

Comment is about Yvonne Brunton (poet profile)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton

Yes - because the reason you went may not be there by the time you get there :)

Nice springy rhythm!

Comment is about Old Age (blog)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton