Each word - one single teardrop
Each line - a rainstorm stirs
Each verse - flash lighting strikes
Each poem - broken heart thunders

Comment is about Residual Haunting (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

For Her
the gift was never unwrapped.

For Him
he did not deserve the prize.

Comment is about For her (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

I was going to say this MIGHT be influenced by a song by Neutral Milk Hotel, but actually - it is definitely influenced, to the point where several of the lines are almost lifted directly from the song.

Here are the lyrics:

"King Of Carrot Flowers, Part 1"

When you were young you were the king of carrot flowers
And how you built a tower tumbling through the trees
In holy rattlesnakes that fell all around your feet

And your mom would stick a fork right into daddy's shoulder
And dad would throw the garbage all across the floor
As we would lay and learn what each other's bodies were for

And this is the room one afternoon I knew I could love you
And from above you how I sank into your soul
Into that secret place where no one dares to go

And your mom would drink until she was no longer speaking
And dad would dream of all the different ways to die
Each one a little more than he could dare to try


So - are you a fan Stu? If so, a little credit may be due to Messrs Mangum et al.

Comment is about spaghetti junction (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

thanks guys, these are great comments and they really do make the chunks i cut from myself to write these poems worth it.

ray - i am glad you noticed, i was spacing the last lines to evoke sensuality and relief

david - as ever, you are to kind. if you dont leave pieces of yourself on the paper/screen what is the point!

cynthia - its the imaginary release/masturbatory fantasies that transport us away from things when we are young. beautifully harsh is just what i was going for!

Comment is about spaghetti junction (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

This is beautifully harsh.

Why is 'someone' upstairs and not at the family table? Could this be just a fancy, after all, a metaphor for self-exploration? Personal sexual relief in counterpoint to the family realities? Only asking.

Comment is about spaghetti junction (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

If you can't sleep you have to get up - and have a hot malt - or a few minutes of slow exercise - or write - or all of the above. Who knows the power of thought connection? But surely all poets know the NEED TO WRITE DOWN IDEAS before they fade. Sleep is like mud -the words will be gone in the morning. Such was the scenario - and here is the result - not instant, but as close as I can get, being me.

Comment is about For her (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

A flair for a lovely line has to have a lovely thought first. I really like this.

To be honest, I think there is always an element of loveliness in those thoughts with which people are tormented, whether purposefully or not. 'Something' is enjoyed, clung to. So - define 'lovely'. It's a real challenge.

Comment is about Residual Haunting (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

Witherspoon's, wither the day and wither away. Gooden Martin: )

Comment is about Down the pub (blog)

Original item by Martin Elder

A fitting tribute, Greg!

I was once told by a friend in LLanelli that DT also used to try to catch fish from the Worm's Head by 'tickling' them.

Give that one a try next visit?

Trev

Comment is about From the Boathouse to Brown's Hotel: on the trail of Dylan Thomas at Laugharne (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Only you Greg! Having read that beguiling account of DT and his final years in such a lovely location, you leave us with a picture of you and Mrs F tossing and tumbling in the back of your car. Not many of us would go that extra mile to relive the 60's!!

A great read, well done and thanks for sharing.

Graham

Comment is about From the Boathouse to Brown's Hotel: on the trail of Dylan Thomas at Laugharne (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Hi, John! Are you better at snoring after drinking whisky?))
)))

Comment is about Humor (blog)

Original item by Larisa Rzhepishevska

Wow.
Its really strong in those simple words.
and sends out quite a message (if i understand it right) about how nature is slowly getting destroyed by our routine and seemingly innocuous actions...

Comment is about The Big Picture (blog)

Original item by David R Mellor

These days, Larisa, I'm much better at "snoring" than "frisky".

Comment is about Humor (blog)

Original item by Larisa Rzhepishevska

Louise 'boobs' reminds me of my granny and her sisters some how. Tommy

Comment is about Louise Etheridge (poet profile)

Original item by Louise Etheridge

Hi Cynthia

Advice appreciated! Tis done and looks a lot better - thank you!

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

great stuff Stu. This is family life at its most threatening, but the ghastly juxtaposition of the sex makes that seem even more appealing as an escape. Very weird and quite upsetting. I especially like the last two lines being spread apart (like legs I suppose)!that does give the poem a kind of powerful resolution.

Comment is about spaghetti junction (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

The Theme for Monday night is Enchantment.

On weekend September Saturday 26th - Sunday 27th
The Enchanted Gallery

At the Art Gallery all art work which includes poetry will be put on display.

Anyone who has not got a register art work form you need one to enter your work.

All work to be handed in from Monday 14th September to Sunday 20th so there is still time to do one.

If we do a Collage poem on Monday night we could always enter that done by the Stockport Write Out Loud Group.

Comment is about Write Out Loud at Stockport art gallery tonight (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

My only excuse for this is an inability to dig the poem I`m trying to write out of the messs I`ve got it into.

I`ll post the next bits next time I get stuck.

Comment is about (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

Stu, I really love how powerful this is. Short and not hiding behind an overuse of words. To the point and brutally so. Very well done.

Comment is about £1 (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

Thanks MC for enjoying and commenting on Mary CMIT.
It tangles you up a bit but comes out right at the end!

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

I do feel a bit of a shit now about the Clarke verse. Yesterday, when I wrote it, he was a figure of fun. Today he is a figure of dignity.
There is something special though about beating Aussies at anything.

Comment is about IT'S NOT 5-0 IS IT NOW, GLENN (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Just re-read this Ray. Are you sure you're not Max Miller's love child? Best thing I've read for ages.

Comment is about MARY CAN'T MAKE IT THURSDAY (blog)

Original item by ray pool

I endorse the comments from GS. This is clever - with a
perfectly set up conclusion.

Comment is about MARY CAN'T MAKE IT THURSDAY (blog)

Original item by ray pool

This reminds me of Geoff Boycott crowing with delight at
the debacle at Trent Bridge this past week. Hard not to
grin and enjoy the moment. I have worked at Lords and
seen the great performances from Aussie players like
Marsh, Thomson, McGrath and Lillee and how they loved
to beat us up at every opportunity. However, that said,
there is still sympathy in my heart for the Aussie captain,
Michael Clarke who, it is now reported, has retired from
test cricket. It is hoped he won't let his life to come be
dogged by the cruel result here in the UK. A captain
can only work with the talent he's given & his batsmen
failed catastrophically/collectively when most needed.
Perhaps the Oz selectors and coaches should be the ones considering retirement?
Finally, I would LOVE to have had Richie Benaud around to hear his commentary on that momentous match!!!!

Comment is about IT'S NOT 5-0 IS IT NOW, GLENN (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Brilliant work Ray, very cleverly worked out.

Comment is about MARY CAN'T MAKE IT THURSDAY (blog)

Original item by ray pool

just re read, I wish i wrote this. Trade?

Comment is about How does it feel (blog)

loving how short your new work is! fucking perfect.

Comment is about hurt (blog)

Hi Ray,
Thanks for reading and getting the point behind my words :0
Your sample piece is brilliant. Can I offer a more in depth critique of your work? I cannot, except I know what appeals to me as a lay reader, something that resonates with me :)
Preeti

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

thanks Martin - for reading and commenting - I had 'Comeclose and Sleepnow' rattling round my head all day and finally set down the first verse and promptly remembered it was a poem by Roger McGough! - so a big nod to him.

I'm not entirely convinced by my endeavours but hey-ho - trying to be romantic but death made a late appearance.

Comment is about sleepnow and movecloser (blog)

thanks Ray - I think I will come back to this one as it was a bit rushed in order to be relevant - do you know Paul Dehn's apocalyptic poetry from the 60's?:

Ring-a-ring o' neutrons
A pocket full of positrons
A fission! A fission!
We all fall down.

Comment is about hiroshima (blog)

Nice and playful and maybe like a kaleidoscope that you shake and another idea comes up - jagged in a way!

Comment is about hurt (blog)

I have been fascinated by an ongoing feel with some of your work Tommy. I almost seem to be watching the Matrix, as if you are examining one pocket of experience and drawing it out like a thread . am I anywhere close with that? Respectfully Ray

Comment is about Vertices iv (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

I like the way you have a delicate and inspiring image suddenly flayed alive with the scar of that horrendous conception . It reminds me of the disgusting Bush - generated term "shock and awe."
If there is a hell within perhaps he may be given a front line seat.

Comment is about hiroshima (blog)

A fine work Stu. Hospitals have a life of their own and a sort of terrible inevitability exists in them; they deserve all our support and I for one fear them . Your poem gives the game away and moves those goal posts I feel.
I love the line "I am lost." That seems to me to sum up the dream like quality of hospitals.

Comment is about sterile (i am not) (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

I particularly enjoyed "Hear The Faint Chimes" - for its
mystical concept of flowers/bells and the lovingly chosen
words that work so well. I can see why you are so
pleased!
I confess to rarely if ever consciously using a known
formal poetic pattern, instead letting an inbuilt rhythm
in my head dictate flow and length. The "mechanics"
- as I think of them - are surely there to be used as
a suitable framework for what is fermenting in the mind.

Comment is about Two Formal Poems (re-posts) (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

JC - seen and noted, thanks.
"Political inexactitude"? If that means using logic to
determine whether history sets a precedent for subsequent
behaviour and values, I plead "guilty as charged, your
honour".

Comment is about QUI ES IN CAELIS (...who art in Heaven...) (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Thank you so much for your comment on D.T.
I am never sure whether to reply there or here. So this thank you may be overkill but it is here none the less. ;)

Comment is about Martin Elder (poet profile)

Original item by Martin Elder

very much enjoying reading your work, especially these more recent and shorter pieces - these weeds are like the thoughts in my head

Comment is about why i don't mow my lawn (08/06/2015) (blog)

Original item by Zach Dafoe

Cheers Ray re 'tasty flesh'. You have a good grasp of the thrust of the piece.

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

Cynthia- re Vertices lll, 'yet' means that despite the folding of the paper, this new alignment of words - the syntax of the letter remains. Folding the letter can not obliterate its content. Tommy

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

'yet' meaning despite the folding of the paper, this new alignment of words - the syntax of the letter remains. Folding the letter can not obliterate its content. Tommy

Comment is about Vertices iv (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

Hello Harry, thank you very much for reading and commenting on Perfect.
This has been hiding in the notebook for some years and I finally (in desperation) finished it off and put it out there.
I'm really not au-fait with the poetry technical terms but appreciate your kind comments as always.

My very best regards,

Graham

Comment is about Harry O`N eill (poet profile)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

In fairness to TC, MC, "ridiculing" was my word. Tommy was quoting me. It's what I thought he was doing on that SNP post of yours.

Comment is about QUI ES IN CAELIS (...who art in Heaven...) (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

I've just read the phraseology resorted to by Tommy Carroll
- most impressive - to refer to his "ridiculing" an old post of mine. However, he never did refute my factual point
(he couldn't, of course) that in WW2 the Scots Nationalists
did approach the Nazis with a view to a compatible
arrangement when there was a chance the Allies would
lose the war. Ergo, it showed that the Scots Nationalists
are first and foremost a "me/us above all" party with no
hesitation in seeking its aims/other allies beyond the
United Kingdom when it suits them.

Comment is about QUI ES IN CAELIS (...who art in Heaven...) (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

JC/Harry - thank you for the comments...valued from two
contributors whose own work on WOL I enjoy/admire.

Comment is about MEASURES (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Fabulous - not sure why. Why do you say 'yet...'?

Comment is about Vertices iv (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

Your iconic 'eye' is a master stroke. It could be male or female. I'm still uncertain whether it is famed by fabric or long leaves; the texture suggests 'plant' wrapped about a human face. Either way, the picture is mind-startling. I was glad to see it again.

I remember the famous photo of the green-eyed girl from Afghanistan, Time magazine cover, years ago.

Comment is about David Blake (poet profile)

Original item by David Blake

Nice poem, but it feels more like a song. very good it creates a really warm atmosphere.

Comment is about sleepnow and movecloser (blog)

thank you for your comments..please do read some more :) ill have a look at yours x

Comment is about Corr Lens (poet profile)

Original item by Corr Lens

Looking at the terrible warlike-ness of that guy hanging
on the cross there reminds of of some poet or other who once said that we were all sentenced to Life, but that God commuted it to death.

Comment is about QUI ES IN CAELIS (...who art in Heaven...) (blog)

Original item by John Coopey