Thanks for liking it, Suki, I kept it to the tanka format - pretty much a true story ?

Comment is about Carolyn (blog)

Original item by Rick Gammon

Hello Keith, thank you for showing interest in this poem. not many people like to read about scriptures, spirituality or God. thank u for your lovely comment.
-ghazala l.

Comment is about keith jeffries (poet profile)

Original item by keith jeffries

Martin, thank you for commenting on my poem Shell Shock. Despite ten years in HM Forces the poem was inspired a World War One veteran who I knew as a boy. He survived the Battle of the Somme. Thank you again. Keith

Comment is about Martin Elder (poet profile)

Original item by Martin Elder

fabulous... i found myself in a miraculous world of writing.. What will be the http://essaydune.com/ for such a writing? what d'you think?

Comment is about Delusions (blog)

Original item by Green

Thanks Gary
I do like to put some rhythm in my poems if I can, I am quite driven by something of a historical nature or as in this case an almost fairy tale feel to it.
I am on the mend and will probably be back at work soon.
Glad you like the poem
Thanks again

Martin

Comment is about Robbers tongue (blog)

Original item by Martin Elder

I have never experienced what has traditionally been called shell shock and I hope I never do but I have come across a number of guys who have really been through the mill with what is now called PTSD and it is dreadful. I take my hat off to anybody who has. A good and brave poem Keith, well done.
Nice one

Comment is about Shell Shock (blog)

Original item by keith jeffries

Fantastic Stu. the even consistent rhythm in this great and moves the piece along at a good pace. There is a real sense of urgency to it
Fab

Comment is about what god has joined together let no man put asunder (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

I love 'a blank sheet full of bullet holes' in particular what a great poem elp

Comment is about discontinuity (blog)

Original item by nunya

like stepping into an Andrew Wyeth painting - with no longer enough fabric to even catch the wind.

Comment is about discontinuity (blog)

Original item by nunya

Thank you so much Greg, I really couldn't have hoped to receive such high praise. I'm thrilled that you liked this so much.

And Mr Col, how I chuckled at your comment that explains the marmite mystery, and almost creased up laughing at the cheesy line. Great stuff ?

Thanks again to you both.

Paul

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

Be assured, gentlemen, that we are all being profiled, no matter our politics or nationality...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPhWR4d3FJQ

elP

Comment is about LIBERAL THEFT (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Looking forward to reading your recently published work, Stu..

All the best to you,

elP

Comment is about Stuart Buck (poet profile)

Original item by Stuart Buck

relentless and special Stu. When so much is dead the poem comes to life -there is always an internal dream at the centre of much of your work, and suspension of disbelief or rather an entering in is essential to the reading.
Uniquely Stu Buck.

Ray

Comment is about what god has joined together let no man put asunder (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

I really like this one Martin especially the first section and the way you ended it with bliss and kiss. It feels quite rythmic in parts too which I think drives it on. It's quite romantic and has a fairy tale or short story feel about it.

Hope you're feeling better.

Comment is about Robbers tongue (blog)

Original item by Martin Elder

I enjoyed the subtlety and directness together and the spot on atmosphere, finally collapsing on a sequence of thoughts.
Lovely sleaziness and a sort of wonderment.

Ray

Comment is about THE GIRL FROM GALLIENI (blog)

Original item by john short

Thanks for the comments, gents.
I wonder how many times the words "liberal" and "left"
have been paired against the total of "liberal" linked to
"right". The appropriation deserves to be challenged
for its basic premise that only one such "pairing" can
exist in the rainbow spectrum of human attitudes and behaviour. I have my own experience about the
moral imperative that is associated with one and not
the other - and it has not been attractive or justified.
As for Americans...with a substantial U.S. set of family
relations in the South and Far West of that country...I know they can often come across as brash and short on
patience with what they see as wishy-washy attitudes
in a land that was forged in fierce individualism and a get-ahead striving for self-improvement. Rightly or
wrongly, they have a deep suspicion of anything they
might term the "free lunch" attitude to life. But that
doesn't mean they won't stop to lend a hand to someone in need - or admire those who use their circumstances
to do likewise. The fact is that the USA is basically
a collection of assorted often contrasting attitudes of
mind, and what you meet can depend on where you happen to be.
Certainly, if I visited the country I wouldn't expect to be
welcomed with open arms by describing my employment
using "liberal" terminology. It infers a presumption that
it is somehow deserving of elevated morally superior status and no American is likely to take kindly to that.

Comment is about LIBERAL THEFT (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Thanks all for your as ever in depth comments, and a compliment to my work .
David, I did feel desperately sorry for the kids - I've seen their development from the start, and could sense the traincrash coming. It has taken some patience and tolerance from me! Thanks my friend.
Col. The image of the elephant just sprang to mind, but your idea is brilliant, and I shall pay homage to that by adopting the title. The parallel was inspired by the sheer size and solidity of the fort. You have read in a lot as perceptive writers do. Cheers.

Paul, Good points thank you. The aging factor can be over a short period showing a decline and this certainly applies here. Bittersweet indeed! I am attracted to themes of decay actually.

Bless yer all.

Comment is about THE ELEPHANT IN THE GARDEN (blog)

Original item by ray pool

Hi Amy,

No worries, the sentiments remain the same. It's good that you found inspiration from overhearing the original comment and I like the poem even more for having been written that way. Good luck with your studies or work or whatever.

All the best

Colin

Comment is about Because My Professor Can't Teach (blog)

Original item by AmyLogan

Yikes! Think I might have upset the Amy Winehouse Appreciation Society! 'Marmitey' as in either loving or hating but (*types hastily*) hate is much too strong a word. Pass the ladder this hole is getting deeper. Certainly not cheesy. We had enough of that with your last offering ?

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

Samual, your poems go from strength to strength as you are so abundantly articulate. You take the reader with you even if the reader does not share your predicament. You are accomplished in this respect. Thank again. Keith

Comment is about Dormant (blog)

Original item by Samual Jake

Chris, in your biography you say the ´the past is always present ´. For many this may seem an off the cuff remark but in reality is is an essential ingredient of our existence. Thank you. Keith

Comment is about Chris Armstrong (poet profile)

Original item by Chris Armstrong

Chris, this poem is profoundly moving. It reached every sinew of my being. Thank you. Keith

Comment is about Suicide’s Beck (blog)

Original item by Chris Armstrong

Impertinence? Hmm. I was once in conversation with an American in Iceland, who based his view of the world on what he learned from Fox News. He asked me what kind of newspaper I worked for. I replied that I'd call it a "liberal" newspaper. When I went to the toilet he confided to my wife that he thought me brave to make such an admission, to use the "l" word. So, by all means, test your theory by going over to the States and declaring yourself a "liberal", MC - assuming that they let you in. It's not a course of action I would seriously advise, though.

Comment is about LIBERAL THEFT (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Paul, there is a marvellous music and rhythm to this, or swing, I should say. When you're writing about someone who is close to so many people's hearts, it's important to get the words right. You have done. Thank you. I think she would approve. What a voice. What a loss.

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

Hi Colin! Thank you for the comment, the poem is actually not about me I should have made it clearer that I heard someone on campus say "Because my professor can't teach I'm failing" and I thought it was an amazing start to a poem and I went from there. I am with to though on the school system not being proper and things do need to change!

Comment is about Because My Professor Can't Teach (blog)

Original item by AmyLogan

Thanks Col and Graham for your compliments and thank you David for the like.

Col, I have just typed a detailed response and it suddenly disappeared. Ay,ay, ay....the pain. Anyway, briefly, thanks for the honest feedback, I appreciate you taking time to do this and I find it helpful. btw, is marmitey like cheesy? I really didn't want to create that feel (mental note: must buy a cheese-o-meter!). I followed her career quite closely from before she signed to Island Records. I think she was an amazing talent, and this was echoed by the likes of Aretha Franklin. Genius? Who can say? She was not everyone's cup of tea I know. And mentioning Marvin (Gaye) was simply me imagining the possibility of these two great singers meeting.

Graham, thank you for your kind words. I do hope I got the balance right. And, yes, I agree, she left music of the quality of 'back to black' that can continue to be enjoyed.

Thanks again to you both,

Paul

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

Ray, another one of your poems that superbly captures something from the past. There is sadness in the story of the rotting fort and the loss of the kids' father that made me think this could be about aging and the bittersweet nature of life in general. Hope this mkeas snese ?

Paul

Comment is about THE ELEPHANT IN THE GARDEN (blog)

Original item by ray pool

Great are the poets
who lead us on

Great are the poets
following in their footsteps

Comment is about April 2017 Collage Poem: Greatness (blog)

Original item by Stockport WoL

If ever there was a sight "fit" to be seen
It'll be JC on his rowing machine!
Sorry - but your link seems restricted to Facebook users
and stops me contributing as a non-member via the said
link.

Comment is about SAMMY B GOODE (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

John, I shall make every effort to keep up with your posts. They are powerful. 'History Lesson' is really superb.

Comment is about john short (poet profile)

Original item by john short

Thanks, Colin. I'm up to 2.5 hours now. I did it 7 years ago when I was 58. It's bloody hard this time round!

Comment is about SAMMY B GOODE (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Much enjoyed. I like the way it probes like an all-seeing camera, through sight into situation into soul. I can see why it's published.

Comment is about THE GIRL FROM GALLIENI (blog)

Original item by john short

There are 'rules' about fragrance in Canada. I've never been quite sure whether they are local to a city/town/church/Bingo hall etc. as I 'pop' in and out these days. But they do exist, as many people totally agree with you (like me) that scent can be an abomination to the public.

The only thing worse is applying nail polish on public transport. But, maybe - taking it off with oxygen-destroying remover that could take a year's stain out of a family toilet bowl.

Comment is about No Fragrance Allowed (blog)

Original item by Laura Taylor

thanks for the extra location details Keith. They have put me in mind of something I wrote a year or so back on a flight to Gran Canaria. I will repost it for you to read if you get time. Cheers, Col

Comment is about keith jeffries (poet profile)

Original item by keith jeffries

Exceptional in all ways.

Comment is about April 2017 Collage Poem: Greatness (blog)

Original item by Stockport WoL

Thanks to you all!

Comment is about Last day of voting in Saboteur awards - deadline is midnight tonight (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

When the young die too early their sins tend to be easily overlooked as they will not enjoy the time to reflect on themselves later in life.

This is a nicely weighted tribute Paul, not too gushy. She was damaged goods for sure. If I had been her father (equally damaged) I wouldn't have let her get so screwed up.

The good news is we'll always have "back to black"

Good work.

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

bit Marmitey this one for me Paul. I never quite got the Wonder of Winehouse or Diana for that matter - or one of any number of modern day drugged and beleaguered celebs/royals/athletes etc yawn etc. Seems they all fed/feed on each other - media frenzy/public adoration/rehab bills. How do you separate any of it? The age thing is a bit uncanny but I suspect there is some correlation with them all finding stardom at a young age followed by a successful but short career and demise around the same point.

having been all negativey I do think there is much to admire in this poem - 'time enough to tattoo yourself on hearts and minds' is a great line and I love the ending. But I don't think she was a genius. Perhaps by asking her to say hi to Marvin you are knocking her down a peg or two?

thanks for posting Paul - she will always divide opinion and create debate which is a good legacy. Thanks also Suki for redirecting me back to Cracked Symbols and giving me the chance to reread those floral tributes again.

Cheers
Col

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

well written Hannah - a sad story but hope, protection and self-preservation summed up in the last verse. Colin

Comment is about Little Sister Hush Hush (blog)

Original item by Hannah Orosco

A lovely poem, Neil.

Comment is about 'Rowing' by Neil Robertson is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

as David said, a poem which transports one's mind somewhere else - and there is so much rich imagery here that it's not difficult to be transported. Beam me up Ray.

It is sad too, very sad. There are few images sadder than 'an expiring elephant on its knees' and perhaps the elephant is a metaphor for the things that went unsaid or understood between husband and wife. Which makes me think of an alternative title - The Elephant in the Garden.

again, as David said, a great idea for a poem.
Colin

Comment is about THE ELEPHANT IN THE GARDEN (blog)

Original item by ray pool

Thanks Suki, I have just read Cracked Symbols and enjoyed it tremendously, brilliantly inventive writing. So sad how many 'stars' died aged 27, it's uncanny. Glad you liked this one Suki, much appreciated.

Paul

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

this is really very good and takes me back to my own poetic excursions to Paris. I particularly like the vagrant poet and the brunette, plump thighs and all. I'd be tempted to take them off somewhere to explore a different side of the suburbs. Good work John. Thanks for posting.
Colin
btw, really liked your History Lesson sample poem.

Comment is about THE GIRL FROM GALLIENI (blog)

Original item by john short

you can do it Amy - with or without your professor - I really hope it works out for you. This is a problem here in the UK too. My son's class is behind on their physics because the teacher waffles on about stuff they don't need to pass the exam. I have no time for vanity teaching. Stick to the curriculum. It's the system that fails you Amy - not yourself. You can do it and it's worth the effort. Good luck. Colin

Comment is about Because My Professor Can't Teach (blog)

Original item by AmyLogan

Hi all,

Thank you for taking the time to read and leave feedback.

elP - I haven't read any Asimov, but a fair bit of Phil k.Dick. I do enjoy his dark humour. He really predicted with uncanny precision so much about what has come to pass.

Col, cheers as always. Elon Musk - there's more to him than meets the eye..

Suki

Comment is about Escape To Easter Island A Gated Community (blog)

Original item by Suki Spangles

Hi Paul,

I didn't realise Amy is also a part of the so-called 27 club.
Lovely poem.

Funnily enough, I wrote the poem Cracked Symbols about the aftermath of her passing a few months ago.

Cheers,
Suki

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

This is a great poem David. Economical with words, a perfect example of how less is more. Says all that needs to be said.

Comment is about ALEPPO (blog)

Original item by David Subacchi

Thank you Ghazala for your kind compliment. And, true indeed, this life is so uncertain.

Paul

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring

sad!!! emotional piece of work..marvelously portrayed.

Comment is about Little Sister Hush Hush (blog)

Original item by Hannah Orosco

life is uncertain...but death is certain...each one has its own time....either too early or too late....still v die!!! no matter how much fame and glory we earn, from dust we came..to it we return.....lovely poem!!!!

Comment is about Queen of Camden (blog)

Original item by Paul Waring