Ray,
You paint a picture of some gushing woman who desperately seeks attention. I have known a number os such people, men also, who conceal a rather inadequate personality. The poem is well put together and the final stanza really does have the final say.
Thank you for this.
Keith
Comment is about NAMEDROPPER (blog)
Original item by ray pool
<Deleted User> (19836)
Tue 17th Jul 2018 20:27
I'm a bit embarrassed...I can think of nothing to say except AWESOME. It's as if you've read my thoughts. Bravo!
Comment is about Signals (blog)
Original item by Matt Tyldesley
Really effective Damon - like a pictorial story and much to the point. Good and powerful stuff underplayed.
Ray
Comment is about Grandma (blog)
Original item by Mikey V Kinsey
What with the excitement over my excellent poetry and sensing the love towards me, I thought it opportune to give you all the chance to buy my latest and greatest tome, “Proper Poems by John Coopey, the Finest Poet From Chapel Haddlesey Ever To Draw Breath” (see pic).
It comes with an accompanying CD of Yours Truly sounding every bit like Richard Burton.
It costs £5, with all profits going to Candlelighters, a charity supporting kids with cancer. What do you say, Seanin? You know you want to.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
I am delighted that my short piece is gaining favour and thank all for the lovely comments.
Stu, I was quite inspired by a pamphlet I am reading which just taught me to go for the sweet spot . The experience was fairly upsetting as I buried the blackbird. Thanks.
Keith, i'm grateful to be read as you suggest - it means a lot. Cheers.
Suki, I recall your welcome comment from before - there needs to be a betting site attached! I'm especially happy as I edited it down.
Thank you Brian, appreciated.
Thank you too Anya. (!!!)
Cheers Pat. All the best!
Yes thanks Graham; it's nice to know you enjoyed this simple poem.
Col, too kind. Hope the weekend went to plan.
That's a full blown liking, which i'm liking Martin thank you.
Nice to have your support in reading my stuff Hannah. And vice versa.
Thanks Kevin, who says there is a north south divide!!
Lovely of you Rachel, so pleased.
I can't miss out my good friend Wolfgar, who cannot contribute here, but who contacted me to say how much he thought of the poem.
Comment is about ‘Bye bye blackbird’ by Ray Pool is Write Out Loud’s Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by steve pottinger
Colin - how you read the poem is your ownership. How I write it is mine.
Brian - I might test the water.
MC - You should know by now, for a poem to be a good poem you have to say the “right” thing.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Pithy and hitting a few marks on our way through life.
We all make-do with second best or making mistakes at times and console ourselves with reasons we can accept.
I particularly like the pay-off line. Spot on!
Comment is about I’ll Take That! (blog)
Original item by Rick Varden
<Deleted User> (18980)
Tue 17th Jul 2018 17:31
Get your own back John...write one about up trouser legging.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Unfortunately, this age encourages the anonymous to add
ill-mannered conceit to online exchanges and it is the
response that it elicits that is often censored - a somewhat unbalanced situation that requires the most careful
impartial consideration.
Comment is about Never Mess Round With a Rhymer Joyti (blog)
Original item by Don Matthews
I would have called this "Into The Unknown" - both for the
sad death described and for its writer's own sudden future
without her.
I can accept the absence of rhyme when each verse is
presented in this way - terse and to the point.
Comment is about Grandma (blog)
Original item by Mikey V Kinsey
JC - call a Tory MP by a four letter obscene word and that's
OK. Virtually anything else is considered "no go" and that's
rather sad if and when it precludes irony or an honestly-held
pertinent point of view and comments connected thereto.
Noel Coward wrote "Don't Let's Be Beastly To The Germans" and I can imagine that any similar effort which
might substitute the EU for the Germans would be pounced
upon with virtuous declarations about hurting feelings.
To paraphrase Roosevelt, the only thing we should be offended about is a prohibition against causing offence.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Colin - It was meant to be offensive. To Upskirters and Chris Chope MP.
There was a time when WOL did irony.
Ian - You couldn’t be more wrong.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
you got exactly the response you were looking for John - feigning surprise is a bit rich ?
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Dear Mr Waling - it matters not whether (or not) I have
read the poets to whom you refer. More to the point, it
DOES matter that publishers - presumably those you
rubbish in your truculence - are not queuing up to publish
them. So, that leaves the self-help avenue...or is that to
be conveniently disregarded in the hope that the cost and
opportunity will eventually come from those you attack
with such conviction of purpose, perhaps bludgeoned into
acceptance via opportunistic applications of "guilt" and accusations of "neglect"?
Talent will out - whatever the means employed and tenacity is the prime mover in any artistic endeavour
involving what is primarily subjective material. Long may it remain so.
Comment is about Addressing The Poetry Periphery (article)
Original item by Mike Took
If anyone would like to see how offensive this was, or how snowflakey the objections were, please feel free to e-mail me. But be warned; it is truly dangerous stuff.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
If anyone would like to see how offensive this is or how snowflakey the objection, please feel free to e-mail me. But be warned; this was truly dangerous stuff!
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Read the code of conduct. It'll become clear.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
If there's one thing worse than a pervert, it's a pervert so resolute in his depraved tendencies that he dresses them up as piss-poor poetry and declares them for everyone to see. It is alarming, to say the least, that Write Out Loud endorses this behaviour by allowing it to be so shamelessly displayed.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
elPintor
Tue 17th Jul 2018 12:32
..glad to have this opportunity to say I'm not surprised at all--it's a fine piece of writing, Ray.
Rachel
Comment is about ‘Bye bye blackbird’ by Ray Pool is Write Out Loud’s Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by steve pottinger
Just research as part of my apprenticeship in Gynaecology, Brian. It’s been a 50-year course.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
To my shame, I laughed out loud. Nice work, Ian! ?
Comment is about blown it (blog)
Original item by Ian Whiteley
Tue 17th Jul 2018 11:16
thanks for reading my poem and commenting.
now i can go on.
Becky Who?
are you really a Who?
who knows.
Comment is about Becky Who (poet profile)
Original item by Becky Who
What a star. I wish I could teach my mother of a similar age how to use such devices, but she struggles with her mobile phone. Mind you I am a bit of a technophobe myself!
Nice one Mike
Comment is about Hi Tech Granny (blog)
Original item by mike booth
Thank you everyone
Comment is about Happy Ending (lyrics this is a song) (blog)
Original item by Mikey V Kinsey
<Deleted User> (18980)
Tue 17th Jul 2018 10:03
John - like the rhyming sequence, but the subject...shudderrrrrr!
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
<Deleted User> (13762)
Tue 17th Jul 2018 08:57
reminded me of an old PS2 game I used to play:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7GR8mgdZds
Comment is about Ascension To Prophecy (blog)
Original item by Suki Spangles
<Deleted User> (18980)
Tue 17th Jul 2018 08:46
Well done Don - Brian (also hiding behind a mask...sorry)
Comment is about Never Mess Round With a Rhymer Joyti (blog)
Original item by Don Matthews
Stu and Sofia,
Thank you for comments. They are much appreciated.
Keith
Comment is about Love at Last (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
<Deleted User> (13762)
Tue 17th Jul 2018 08:26
love the third verse Damon. Col.
Comment is about Happy Ending (lyrics this is a song) (blog)
Original item by Mikey V Kinsey
Tue 17th Jul 2018 07:53
<Deleted User> (19836)
Tue 17th Jul 2018 07:48
Hi there WOL staff,
Write Out Loud is a free poetry resource run by a group of volunteers. We should never forget that. I've said it before, but I tip my hat to all of you! So, thanks again for all your work.
Cheers,
Suki
Comment is about Are You Content with Write Out Loud's Content? (article)
Original item by Mike Took
Thank you for all the comments. Brian, for me the part about the kids comes from the experience of seeing the local football coach literally swear at the kids on the pitch at our local gym. Our son is begging to join the football club, and his father is refusing categorically because he doesn't want him to enter that world. It's sad really. Maybe it's a local phenomenon - maybe the teams in England are much more respectful, I don't know.
The other part is inspired the campaign by the National Center for Domestic Violence during the World Cup. Not sure I have the right to repost the picture, it was circulating on Facebook a few days ago.
Comment is about The beautiful game (blog)
Original item by Becky Who
I don't like people who hide behind masks, won't identify themselves then proceed to direct incorrect and vindictive remarks at me in public. I refuse to be treated in this way. Sorry
Comment is about Never Mess Round With a Rhymer Joyti (blog)
Original item by Don Matthews
i think i would love anything written by you
Comment is about Flatiron District (blog)
Original item by Robert C Gaulke
Racha,
I have often experienced what you describe in this poem. Beautifully written.
Thank you
Keith
Comment is about the trap (blog)
Original item by racha
Congratulations on being POW. I always enjoy all your work, so was glad to see you being granted this accolade.
Cheers Kevin
Comment is about ‘Bye bye blackbird’ by Ray Pool is Write Out Loud’s Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by steve pottinger
A poem of real profundity. I am becoming a fan.
Thank you
Keith
Comment is about New eyes (blog)
Original item by racha
<Deleted User> (18118)
Mon 16th Jul 2018 21:00
Football, a beautiful and emotion making game.
Enjoyed reading this.
Hannah
Comment is about The beautiful game (blog)
Original item by Becky Who
<Deleted User> (18118)
Mon 16th Jul 2018 20:58
Love this poem.
I noticed today the tree outside my window has already got a few Autumn golden leaves.
We need rain.
Hannah
Comment is about Rain (blog)
Original item by Chris Armstrong
<Deleted User> (18118)
Mon 16th Jul 2018 20:51
Well done Ray.
I loved this poem first time I read it.
So well deserved to be POTW.
Hannah
Comment is about ‘Bye bye blackbird’ by Ray Pool is Write Out Loud’s Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by steve pottinger
<Deleted User> (13762)
Mon 16th Jul 2018 20:47
lovely poem Racha. Thanks for sharing. Colin.
Comment is about New eyes (blog)
Original item by racha
Seanin Hughes
Tue 17th Jul 2018 20:38
Or I could just donate to Candlelighters and keep the space on my bookshelf for poets I respect.
Comment is about UPSKIRTING (blog)
Original item by John Coopey