this painfully powerful what made you write it?
Comment is about Go to Hell (blog)
Original item by Marianne Daniels
I agree Trev;there's many a tosspot who think they're a bigshot.Funny and insightful stuff! haha!
Comment is about Managementpot Tosspot (blog)
Original item by Trev the Road Poet
Hi Janet,
DD does seem very convertible! From straitlaced to strumpet in a few easy steps. You might have guessed that I like "portrait poetry" - liked this too.
Regards,
A.E.
Comment is about Daphne Demure (blog)
Hi Trevor,
I have never been sure what "managers" do - except make others lives miserable. It has long been my view that this country is overburdened with them, and that given the opportunity, workers can manage theirselves quite efficiently. They produce nothing, interfere in everything and their sole objective seems to be justfying their own existence. This malaise seems to percolate from the political, through the corporate and right down to the shop floor. Yet who manages the managers? It's a very dirty word in my dictionary . . .
Regards,
A.E.
Comment is about Managementpot Tosspot (blog)
Original item by Trev the Road Poet
<Deleted User> (5646)
Mon 15th Jun 2009 10:25
Yes, this is very passionate.
So sad when the dream cannot possibly become a reality which is what the last stanza portrays to me.
Janet.x
Comment is about A Dream (blog)
Powerful, Joan, but sad. Maybe when you find real love it doesnt matter if the passage of time has left its mark? You are everything your experiences have made you.
Cate xx
Comment is about A Dream (blog)
<Deleted User>
Mon 15th Jun 2009 09:51
Thank you both for your comments. The little red haired laddie is my grandson, a McDonald with all the characteristics and traits I wrote about. He is a direct descendant of the powerful Clan MacDonald of ancient Scotland, one branch of which was almost entirely wiped out in the infamous massacre of Glen Coe in 1692 by King William`s men for not signing an Act of Fealty in time. The remnants of the clan were displaced and scattered. Ive based my poem on this tragic event.
Congrats Nabila to your uncle on his little green eyed son, and your little green eyed nephew!
Cate xx
Comment is about My Little Red Haired Laddie (blog)
Original item by Cate
Hi Steve
Thanks for the feedback re Hypocrisy.... I dislike Political Poetry with a passion however this was fired by the smug comments from people and groups, that I would need to recount my fingers ever I should shake hands with anyone of them.
Cheers
Gus
Comment is about Steve Regan (poet profile)
Original item by Steve Regan
You know I love this one Cate. Much as I adore him, I would have to agree that there could be no more defiant or stubborn child than little Jacob. Those qualities my well get him far in life though...
x
Comment is about My Little Red Haired Laddie (blog)
Original item by Cate
Quelle passion...
But it doesn't have to be a dream...
I will opt for verses one and two...
Merci ; )
Comment is about A Dream (blog)
Hi John, no mate no lookin back now, thanx for comment. I like this, its' not only amuisng but its an unusual construction and obviously a good performance piece, cheers Jeff
Comment is about WORK (blog)
<Deleted User> (6292)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 20:30
Steve many many thanks for taking the time to read my poetry, your suggestions demonstrate a great deal of experience which I am lacking and I will be editing along the the lines of your suggestions very soon
Thank you so much.
Augusta x
Comment is about garside (poet profile)
Original item by garside
<Deleted User>
Sun 14th Jun 2009 18:49
first of all let me say what a lovely boy. Secondly, I m very touched by your comment Cate. Lastly, I love your poem - it has been well thought out and constructed , love the tone and language . Thank you will re-post so those who didn't read green eyes can read it x (oh I had just blogged that poem and got phone call frommy green eyed uncle that he has just had a son and he has green eyes too :-)
Comment is about My Little Red Haired Laddie (blog)
Original item by Cate
Hi Andy, thanks for your comment on For Isla. And for taking the time to go back and comment on it a second time. This poem means a lot to me. It was written for my new born grandaughter.
Cate xx
Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)
Original item by Andy N
Hi Janet. So: DD escapes - or does she? I was marching in step until: "brassy as the town hall clock". A Freudian phrase? The clock is, indeed, OUTWARDLY brassy, but it is bound to time and stuck up a tower as surely as Rapunzel. Are we SURE that DD is not fooling herself? Just playing Janet - a pleasing read and fun. Thanks for visiting me with nice comments.
Comment is about Daphne Demure (blog)
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 12:24
Hi Dave,
enjoyed your performance at Wigan, nice to see you posting here.
I like the prisoner, it reminds me of how i feel i Debenhams stores. When in Ikea i feel a bit like Dorothy in the wizard of oz. Follow the yellow brick road and you end up back in the same place. ha ha.
Your phonetic alphabet poem is fantastic, really enjoyed reading that one. :-)
Janet.
Comment is about Dave Carr (poet profile)
Original item by Dave Carr
Thanks Antonionioni.... my gut feeling is that the market`s bottomed, but things are still so volotile that todays good tip is 2morrows disaster...... so if you dont keep your eyes glued to that there screen and get your timing right you could be in for a long wait before you see any return on your investment!
Thanks for you comment Janet.... nice to see you last Thursday on a really good night at the Tudor......
Comment is about Stock Market (blog)
Original item by Cate
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 12:01
Hi John,
i can easily recall days like these.
It's a change of pace for you which takes a bit of getting used to unless it's one you dragged out of the archives. Like it though.
Janet.x
Comment is about Sunday Afternoon (blog)
Original item by John Togher
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 11:57
Hi Cate,
enjoyed listening to you perform this one at Wigan, it came across well.
Just the right amount of humour injected to get the point across and keep the audience entertained. Well done.
Janet.x
Comment is about Stock Market (blog)
Original item by Cate
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 11:46
This is very deep yet cleverly constructed.
I really like this one Emily.
Janet.x
Comment is about born in '85 (blog)
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 11:39
Nice one Emily.
Janet.x
Comment is about gutter ball girlfriend (blog)
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 11:33
Hi Anthony,
you just can't beat those old movies can you?
Love the imagery in this one, i can remember queuing up for the Saturday morning matinee, then when i was old enough to travel on the bus with friends we got free tickets to the cinema 'cos my auntie worked there. Oooh, she had to share them out equally between several nephews and nieces though. Great times!
I'm beginning to sound like Steve Regan with his reminiscing! :-)
Good stuff Anthony and thanks for your lovely comment on my profile.
Janet.x
Comment is about Zorro's Children (blog)
Original item by Anthony Emmerson
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 11:20
I like this one too. It has some truth yet with humour. I can identify with a few people like this unfortunately.
Janet. :-)
Comment is about Managementpot Tosspot (blog)
Original item by Trev the Road Poet
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 11:16
Hope it doesn't lean over and groan too much from the weight of people it eats Antonionioni,
( the cafe that is.)
This reminds me of Torbay and the hilltop cafes and hotels. Sadly the one which fell into the sea, can't remember where that was though.
Janet.x
Comment is about Hungry haiku (blog)
<Deleted User> (5646)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 11:12
Hi Barrie,
enjoyed reading this, maybe there should be mini propellers on bikes these days so the cyclists can rise above the fray. :-)
Or perhaps that should be the pedestrians!
Janet.x
Comment is about Noblesse Oblige (blog)
Original item by Barrie Singleton
<Deleted User> (6292)
Sun 14th Jun 2009 09:19
Thank you so very much Winston for taking the time to read my poem, I am encouraged.
You look very happy and free from all troubles sat upon your boat, what a lovely life that must be.
Augusta x
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Hi Dave
Welcome to WOL. I've enjoyed both your pieces. The second is very clever, I particularly like "Delta" :-)
The IKEA piece is strong too but, would you allow me to offer a supportive comment? I stumbled on a couple of occasions reading it as you have varying line lengths between corresponding lines in the different verses. (Count 'em!)
Forgive me, but I'm a bit obsessive about this, and find that - for comic verse especially, it really helps to get this right as it's to do with the comic necessity about timing.
Because I value the piece (and because I've been awake since Stupid O'clock this morning! Oh, and because I have the same nightmare about the bloody place!), I've been drawn to have a quick play around with it and would suggest a form with lines of 8,6,9,6 syllable length.
Then with a few tweaks and the odd linking word like "and/as/then" etc inserted, there's an even stronger poem in there trying to get out. The same end rhymes and (your very good) jokes, just a bit tighter on the old metre and scansion.
Feel free to tell me to stick this, Dave :-) But, if you're interested then take another look at the piece and then maybe message back here or contact me via my profile page and I could either email my thoughts to you privately or post them up here.
Cheers.
Tony
Comment is about Dave Carr (poet profile)
Original item by Dave Carr
HI WInston - thanks again for reading my work and taking the time to comment - think there is a little tweaking perhaps with this one - but on the whole am content with Yvonne :-)
steve x
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Hi Dave, Welcome to WOL. your PapaOscarEchoMike piece is a great idea. Winston
Comment is about Dave Carr (poet profile)
Original item by Dave Carr
nice little gem Emily.Winston
Comment is about born in '85 (blog)
Thank you for taking the time to read my poems Jeff...
Your comments and suggestions are always appreciated...
I will actually be re-writing/editing 'Connection' as my mentor Gus has suggested...
Just waiting for a bit of free time : )
Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)
Original item by Jeffarama!
Hi Anthony... You have encapsulated an era of a certain age never to be repeated. Brilliant stuff. nice end too. Win
Comment is about Zorro's Children (blog)
Original item by Anthony Emmerson
Hi Isobel and Francine! Not been damaged yet but only a matter of time - had some near misses. Thanks for calling.
Comment is about Noblesse Oblige (blog)
Original item by Barrie Singleton
Hi steve
A big fan of this one. Originally and still. Winston
Comment is about incoming (blog)
Original item by garside
Quite humourous Barrie...
So... was your inspiration drawn perhaps from being one of the 'walking wounded?'
Comment is about Noblesse Oblige (blog)
Original item by Barrie Singleton
Lovely to see another of your very clever poems Barrie. You are getting me worried about what my 15 year old gets up to now. He has the tiniest of bikes for his tall frame, the gears and breaks are constantly in disrepair and he zooms all over the place on it - if only the roads were a little wider but none of them were ever designed for such traffic. I seem to be wittering on as usual - I should just say a very witty and cleverly constructed poem.
Isobel x
Comment is about Noblesse Oblige (blog)
Original item by Barrie Singleton
Very grateful Anthony. A very uplifting site. I have sent 'Noblesse' and my 'homage' (read in French) to the great Duffy - 'Lifetime Leg End'.
Thanks again
Barrie
Comment is about Noblesse Oblige (blog)
Original item by Barrie Singleton
Ieuan Cilgwri
Sat 13th Jun 2009 17:18
"shit with sugar on" / "drenched fur"
Comment is about Steve Regan at the Tudor House, Wigan June 2009 (photo)
Ieuan Cilgwri
Sat 13th Jun 2009 17:11
legend
Comment is about Baz and his team take to the stage at the Tudor House, Wigan June 2009 (photo)
Hi Barrie,
I'm not sure whether you have discovered
http://www.lightenup-online.co.uk/
yet. Take a look if you haven't. The Editor - Martin Parker is a friend of mine - and a very competent poet, writing in similar style to some of your own work. I'm sure he would welcome it if you dropped him a line.
Regards,
A.E.
Comment is about Noblesse Oblige (blog)
Original item by Barrie Singleton
Hiya John.
I think workplace alienation is a MASSIVE problem. You capture the frustration here and give work two fingers - on behalf of countless millions. So many people will know just how you feel.
Do you sometimes go to poetry nights at the Tudor? If you spot me there, introduce yourself. Cheers.
PS I'm terrible with faces and names, so apologies if you already have said 'hello'!
Comment is about WORK (blog)
Excellent Dan, very well written
While all the while we become no wiser we stay like children
Endlessly searching for the portal to become the immortal
fantastic and intrgueing, think its one of your best works yet mate, cheers Jeff
Comment is about The chalice of life (blog)
Original item by Daniel Hooks
Great stuff Isobel, and well performed at Wigan, I'll be in touch soon, Jeff XX
Comment is about You And Me Babe (blog)
Original item by Isobel
Hi Steve, great little poem this and works well the way you structured it, nice one Jeff
Comment is about Our Hero (blog)
Original item by Steve O'Connor
Hello Daniel
Just read lilium inter-spinas. To start with, what a great title. the soft lilly and the hard spines. Says a lot this poem about floating through life (for me) I imagined a balloon drifting along daring lifes problematic thorns to puncture it. One small quibble, are the words "deep blue sea" too cliche? they jared with me a bit. Fantastic poem. Keep posting. Winston
Comment is about Memoir. (poet profile)
Original item by Memoir.
Will certainly try to make the next Bards Steve - with or without all my lovely sisters!
Comment is about Steve Regan (poet profile)
Original item by Steve Regan
Lovely Anthony, very evocative. Took me back to my days at the ABC Minors on Saturday mornings. We'd sing a song before the film show began ... "We are the boys and girls well known as / The Minors of the ABC! ... And every Saturday we line up / To see the films we love / And shout aloud with glee!" Summat like that. Then on the eay home we'd buy bags of broken biscuits from Wigan market and munch on 'em as we dawdled our way home through Menses Park. Oh, Lordy, don't get me reminiscing...
Comment is about Zorro's Children (blog)
Original item by Anthony Emmerson
Marianne Louise Daniels
Mon 15th Jun 2009 14:55
what was the inspiration behind this? ;-)
I think we can all relate to this using this site - it's like not being able to unscrew the jam jar to get a better look at the firefly inside.
Really like the line:
"Doorways that never shut into places we have never seen
emotional content that never relents or lets us know
what it means to be human"
Well done!
Thanks for the comments!
Comment is about Poems (blog)
Original item by Daniel Hooks