Because I can no longer kiss you
no longer feel your skin
beneath my fingers
or hear you in the night
Because I can no longer call you
no longer sound your name
beneath my breath
or hear you whisper soft
Because I could not stop time passing
could not return time's sand
beneath its glass
or heal the wounds of time
Because I could not hold you here
could yet y...
Friday 28th December 2018 2:18 pm
I wished you did not miss me because the though of that hurts to the core
I wished i did not ever have to feel the pain,
of you not missing me even more.
I think back to our times at home
your first memories of being so small in my arms
The hours i spent watching you dream
Wishing and hoping i could be the best mother i could be
for you to get the best life you deserve from me.
Tuesday 11th December 2018 2:12 pm
Clock out, start my car and check my phone.
I look down, see a text "Hey, you doing okay bro?"
Confused and realizing I missed about 12 calls.
Didn't know what was going on, nothing was clear,
*Incoming call from 'enter name here'*.
I answered "Hey what's up?" and then I heard the tears.
"What's going on? What did I miss? Are you alright?"
'You didn't hear? She was driving and passed away l...
Tuesday 11th December 2018 7:58 am
Tuesday 13th November 2018 12:51 am
I only try to write of joy
But you only read my sorrow
She came to me by chance
I suppose that's always so
We sang the bodies' lively dance
She rescued me from woe
She came to me in passion
I only knew my lonely life
We dreamt our bodies' ration
She rescued me from strife
The tear you see escape my eye
Remembers only pleasure
The gasp of breath yo...
Friday 19th October 2018 3:19 pm
Above The Light Of The Morning Star
Pity the dark eyed man who chases sleep.
Yet, pity more, the man who finds that realm
and dances with his friends, long gone,
then wakes to find such loneliness in his heart.
A father’s hand laid gently on his shoulder
or a mothers kiss to say farewell on leaving.
These are the magic lanterns
of the ghosts that are their ghosts....
Tuesday 11th September 2018 7:45 pm
I have always been a whole person
Please don’t let what I now describe convince you otherwise
But I left the other part of me in foreign country
I love the way he says my name
With words and phrases I have heard before
But those that have not enlightened me until now
I can breathe around him, more than mere survival
I met him in a world where sum...
Wednesday 29th August 2018 10:19 pm
Walking down this endless road,
Never knowing which way to go.
Each path seems dark,
harder than the last,
constantly hiding from the past.
I try to find the strength to move on,
But each time I do, you still want to have
your fun. When will it sink in?
You will never win.
I’m done playing,
You might think you’re staying.
Truth is you’re as temp...
Tuesday 31st July 2018 9:40 pm
Watching, listening, waiting
An endless unmoving time
Pain thriving within her
Her heart is far from fine.
Feeling, hurting, crying
An endless stabbing pain
Giving up on trying
Her heart so full of strain.
Retching, whimpering, head swirling
An endless wrath of terror
Her fingers clasping, curling
Her heart forever slain.
Calming, numbing, unfeeli...
Monday 30th July 2018 1:17 pm
Get up and Gone
I remember when my uncle, with watery eyes,
Told me how his get up and go
Had got up and gone.
We were looking at the framed photo of his wife,
40 years together, and now only one.
His shoulders shook, a man once so strong,
Used to laughter, drinks and quick with a quip or joke.
And I remember when I too lost sight of the sun,
My vision blurred,...
Tuesday 10th July 2018 10:01 pm
A Wound That Never Heals
It hurts me
when a you shaped hole
appears in the cosmos,
where there is
an absence of colour,
where the sound
where the light
is masked by
dense grey mist.
I miss you
When it rains
a greasy rain,
when the cracked bell
when the planets
Tuesday 26th June 2018 12:12 am
I’m losing my mind.
Don’t you understand?
I’m desperately reaching out for your hand.
Don’t leave me hanging, slipping, falling…
down into the endless abyss of darkness,
Never destined to land.
You’ve saved me once before,
But this time there are no safety ropes.
I’m free-falling, plummeting, going down…
My only hope Is for you to save me now.
I’m losing my ...
Monday 18th June 2018 2:59 pm
I found a picture of you in my arms,
Sleeping securely, safe from harm,
As you knew it, anyway.
Your trust for me was complete,
You wanted for nothing
And thought of my love only
As often as a bird thinks of sky.
You didn’t yet know people
Can go away or even die.
I know how things changed,
But I can’t bear to think of it.
I picture you now, with your love
Thursday 31st May 2018 3:43 pm
I finally figured it out
How to get up there pre-death.
I crawled my way up to you
Without leaving my own bed.
I tried to break you out
But they wouldn't let you leave.
I tried to break you out
To bring you home with me.
I got kicked out of heaven
No they won't let me back.
They said if I ever tried again
To prepare myself for attack.
I'll go back everyday
If I had the slightest cha...
Monday 28th May 2018 7:52 pm
Is it possible,
To love someone you loathe,
To water a field you want to tear down,
To watch them grow as far as you can reach?
Wednesday 9th May 2018 8:23 am
I see it everywhere,
being laughed about, tormented
If only it could be prevented.
This generation needs to grow up
stop being so damn sensitive
a bunch of babies who can’t cope
well how about you stop being so damn negative?
Ha, wait, is that a trigger?
Not yet, but it will be
when you realize you’re the killer
Wednesday 4th April 2018 3:42 am
Back To The Park
It’s mid July,
a summer’s day.
School is just
a memory away.
We lay on grass
and watch the sky
and count the clouds
as they pass by.
We talk of bands
we’d like to see -
Led Zeppelin, Quo,
Sabbath and Free.
a distant bark,
In the park.
You turn to me
and kiss my lips
and move in close,
Tuesday 3rd April 2018 2:55 pm
As the rains came we followed
As the rains fell we listened
And walked towards the minister,
Passing by the dark grave wherein she lies,
To drop another daffodil, a final kiss from life,
On the pale box below.
And on, to cluster round beneath the trees
Circling the family, rooted by some strange harmony
Of communion: a drifting mass lost in loss.
On the hillside, as the ...
Monday 2nd April 2018 3:04 pm
In Elbow Yard the walls are thin
between this world and the next.
We communicate through clairvoyants
because we couldn’t handle text.
But that’s all right mate,
that’s pretty cool,
you didn’t like clowns
and I’m the fool.
In Elbow Yard the darkness reigns
and death dances out of sight
ready to drag us to his ballroom,
illuminated in pale g...
Monday 19th March 2018 8:05 pm
Warhawk and Nate
The Warhawks took off and flew upwards
Like angry hornets looking for trouble
Covering the frail old biplane
A flying camera with brave crew
Tasked to look for enemy locations
Flying here and there warlanes they were
American flown Curtiss fighters
Guarding the Filipino crewed Stearman
On a mission of war in the second global war
The Japs were ready and scrambled planes
Monday 26th February 2018 5:55 pm
we walked the ancient path together
where ancestors had worn the land
into a waypoint to the barrow
carefully observing rituals and customs
under azure skies we stumbled on our way
across this land of Albion
the hops the wheat the barley
bowing heads in solemn recognition
of the passing of souls
as we walked we talked of many things
Thursday 22nd February 2018 12:19 am
When it was discovered, we recoiled
Out of doubt, out of fear
We focused on the opinions of others
Instead of what we thought
When I let our secret fly free,
I was shown acceptance and love
Hope blossomed like a cactus flower
It would be okay.
He was capricious, of two minds
One day yes, the next was no,
He produced a name, but renounced his love
Tuesday 20th February 2018 12:17 am
O, where roams your delicate soul
Does it yet travel the seas
gliding afar with the Arctic tern
or is its delight in quieter waters
in dappled river pools or streams
Is it content to rest in the cool damp shade of the willow
watching minnows play
diving among the nymphs
and sacred lotus
Tuesday 13th February 2018 11:23 pm
If I handed you,
one hundred balloons,
you would drop each one,
and float to the moons.
If I blew some bubbles
and watched as they float
you’d soar far above
and here I quote,
“If all the world,
was spinning round,
like a red balloon,
way up in the clouds,
you’d anchor me,
Well we went and we were,
Wednesday 7th February 2018 9:06 pm
This piece dates from a time when, to put it mildly, I was adrift on a stormy ocean.
I woke from a dream of Huntsmen
cracking with the sound of crashing trees
as they sledge-hammered
the walls of my room.
They said it was to certify
but when they left
the walls still stood,
dividing my loss
Wednesday 3rd January 2018 12:41 pm