There I was,

Standing in the storm,

Walking through the dark world,

Slowly,

All alone. 

Light was dim,

Lamps burnt cold,

Silence all heard,

But my heart's wild roar.

Then there You came,

A gust in the storm,

With Your competitive smile,

And encouraging eyes,

"You done, already?", 

You said, with that smile.

"What more can I do?"

"Race till the t...

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I'm lying awake at 3am

Why am I never intoxicated with positivity? 

Why aren't I a fountain of enthusiasm?

Why can't I see the euphemistic light in this unilluminated darkness?

I'm lying awake at 3am

All of my uncertainties are overwhelming 

The formidable anxiety I've become acclimated with seeps in through open wounds

And yet I've learned to find tranquility in this res...

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I'm used to sleeping alone at night in my bed. No one there.

I'm used to being unloved and unwanted at night, feeling the touch of a bullet.

I'm used to being forlorn and forsaken, dead inside during dark hours. Inside and out. I'm used to having no lover to get wet and sweaty with, damn hot eroticism. Not in my bed or life.

I'm used to having no one hold me...

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