It happens as quickly as it ends, a muffled slam and a splintering of cracks.

Night has fallen quickly, the dull glare of the streetlights hidden by the blinds.

I barely stir when it happens, only waking when footsteps race past my door.

“What’s happening?” I ask groggily, surveying the urgency of my parents.

My brother replies “A car crashed through our fence!”

With both excitemen...

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a chocolate Santa Claus

a piece of motivation

a piece of dedication

a piece of dictation

mission failed

a piece of self hate

a piece of failure

a piece of disappointment

a piece of weakness

cancelled mission

new year, new start

mission restarted

self-hate

lose weight

goals you have to achieve

goals you can't achieve

goals you must proceed

con...

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And why are you still in my head? 

In my chest,

In my soul?

Engulfed by disdain, disgust and love.

And I am so lone.

In the middle of Oxford Street crowds

I want your advice that never helped

I want your forehead kisses that I rejected.

Longing for you on dark silent nights.

To debate: am I ever truly alone?

Or does your phantomlike presence ignite and guide...

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Lust consumes those who fall or the trap

Confusion or jealousy twitches above eyes

Desire to amount to more than the simplicity of existing 

Desire to feel desired 

Tender affection is rejected by violin strings of broken beings 

Sympathy will be forbidden, the truth hidden 

Blackness only welcomes sin.

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