Cheers Dad.

Made some changes. Still unfinished and can't get that line right about the sleep smell and how to get it across. Think I originally put 'nice' in there with a view to changing it, but can't quite get it right.

Comment is about Caroline (blog)

Original item by John Togher

John - I don't know where you're at with this piece? If i was to take this as a 'finished' piece I'd be disappointed. Love the sentiment and the storyline behind it - but as I read it - it sounds disjointed - especially line 3 to 4 of 3rd stanza... and... although a powerful final stanza, the word 'nice' needs kicking in its bollocks - and the last line - 'perhaps that is where the cat sits'?? I'd consider 'perhaps THIS is where the cat sits'???

Love and kisses

Dad xxx

Comment is about Caroline (blog)

Original item by John Togher

But you managed to get as far as her lower abdomen and thighs, Harry...

I liked the preceding bracketed comment. I wonder how many of us hate something about ourselves that other people find attractive?

Very well observed ;;) - and an amusing read!

Comment is about MAUREEN`S FRECKLES (blog)

BOOM! welcome to oldham... once it was calm... long ago...

Comment is about OUR STREET (blog)

Original item by NICK ARMBRISTER

Paint fumes
Dark corner
Poetic atmosphere
Theme selected
Costa debeach
Sun sex
Added extras
Hiring deckchairs
Drinking sarsparella.

Comment is about Stockport WoL (group profile)

Original item by Stockport WoL

Not sure how much irony there is in here, but it definitely has that sense of pre-storm calm about it. intriguing.

Comment is about OUR STREET (blog)

Original item by NICK ARMBRISTER

You are plum crazy! Moi, j'adore les Reines Claudes. Probably my favourite fruit. Post me some? Or email?
You could start an online greengage download service.

Comment is about Greengage Anyone? (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Well spotted, Harry!

Comment is about MAUREEN`S FRECKLES (blog)

Yeh, I often wonder where people get all their money to buy bloody expensive coffee from coffee-shops! That's something I never understand. A fiver on a cup of coffee?!

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Brilliant, Harry, another 'Love it' here too!

Comment is about MAUREEN`S FRECKLES (blog)

hmm not sure I agree with your simple answer to that one!

Comment is about Nigel Astell (poet profile)

Original item by Nigel Astell

well wrote, Jeff. good to see you trying out different styles. I'll knock that ranting poet out of you yet - lol.

Comment is about Cotton Town (blog)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Thank you for your commenmt on Class of 54 Yvonne.

Comment is about Yvonne Brunton (poet profile)

Original item by Yvonne Brunton

Harry. by heck(le)
you made me guffaw
with your fetish for freckles -
Wherever they are!!

Love it too!

Comment is about MAUREEN`S FRECKLES (blog)

Haha, good one, thank you for comment, gave me a chuckle. xx

Comment is about Greengage Anyone? (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

nice one.

Comment is about Class of 54 (blog)

We now name you...HahaHarry O'Neill!
and DO give up your day job.

Loved it.xx

Comment is about MAUREEN`S FRECKLES (blog)

A nicely summed up piece of poetry!

Comment is about CASTING LOTS (blog)

Original item by David Subacchi

Excuse us,but is this poem about greengages-lol!
you should have called this goodie-
'Lynn of Greengages'...ta dah&haha!!.xx

Comment is about Greengage Anyone? (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Hi Robert - welcome to WOL!

Comment is about Robert Garnham (poet profile)

Original item by Robert Garnham

Thanks for the comment on Ode To Keighley.

Get Well Soon.

Comment is about Tommy Carroll (poet profile)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

Sorry about the short notice, MC. I looked in there today and it was much bigger than last year, on two floors. Went on from that to a work colleague's leaving do, and was introduced - it's still a big organisation, and we work different shifts - to another work colleague who had also called in there. Turns out he's got a collection coming out with Salt in the autumn. His name's Luke Heeley.

Comment is about Roll up for London's big poetry book fair (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Hi MC - yes, we must prevent romance from dying out at all costs! Best wishes, Dave

Comment is about Night & Day (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Thank you Larisa - glad you enjoyed it :) Best wishes, Dave

Comment is about Night & Day (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Hey MC,
Thanks for the comment on my Snow poem, I appreciate your thoughts!

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Thanks for the comment on my snow poem Isobel, constructive as usual!

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Thanks all- agree with the static!

Comment is about First Night Of Snow (blog)

Original item by Tom Harding

Apologies to everyone who thought they were going to be tortured by my guest slot in August. I thought I would be clever and take off in my caravan with my wife and grandchildren to Ormskirk for 6 days. The idea being to drive to Middleton on the Sunday, do the Ringers(I was S-O-O-O looking forward to it)and then drive back to the van afterwards, it's only an hour away. Katie had already worked so hard to change my slot from Sept as I will be away then as well. Thank you Katie. Unfortunately my 2 year old grandson had a nasty fall when we took him into Southport for the day and we ended up spending the evening in A & E. He was bruised and sore but nothing worse fortunately. As much as I wanted to read in the guest slot, family comes first. Sorry again folks. Hope to see you all in October.

Review is about Write Out Loud - Middleton on 26 Aug 2012 (event)

This very short notice leaves no time to chase up my own London-based publisher (with a poetry imprint) to push for representation of their clients' interests at this event. Disappointing not to be able to seize the day!!

Comment is about Roll up for London's big poetry book fair (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Ah! happy memories about being for or against prescription in the language class.(and the endless arguments about the prefixes`un`...and `dis`)

When this kind of thing gets going it`s unstoppable.

There is an essay by someone (I think Alice Meynell) about the effectiveness of `un` for poetical use.

Comment is about Few and Less (blog)

Original item by Karen Robinson

I'm sorry I wasn't tryng to mock anyone wishing to write and speak well,only those who take delight in repeatedly pulling you up on your mistakes. Grammar and vocabulary are not the preserve of the middle and upper classes. In an ideal world no one should define themselves, or be defined by others, simply from the way they write or speak.

Comment is about Few and Less (blog)

Original item by Karen Robinson

I heard it a long time ago. I remember her from my youth. I guess she has influenced me.

Comment is about The Dentist (blog)

Original item by Karen Robinson

Forgive me Karen, I am not suggesting that you said working class are thick. What I am referring to is that tension between wanting to improve yourself - improve your education, so forth - and fitting into the milieu from which you came. As an example, I am from Oldham and grew up not <talkin' proper when I were wi' me mates>, but speaking correctly when I was at home, so as not to be pulled up by my mum.
I have a reasonable vocabulary, acquired through study and reading. When I am with my old pals from Oldham I feel an unspoken pressure to talk in a restricted vocabulary. If I use a word outside their quotidian register I risk comments about being pretentious. But just because I am working class does not mean I cannot use the vocabulary I have a acquired, I suppose.

Comment is about Few and Less (blog)

Original item by Karen Robinson

have you read 'I wish I'd looked after me teeth' by the woman humorist poet Pam Ayres

Comment is about The Dentist (blog)

Original item by Karen Robinson

I have had a rare copy of 'letters to a young poet' for 35years and it continues to inspire me

Comment is about Review - Selected Poems: Rainer Maria Rilke (Oxford University Press) (blog)

This is another one that I like. Strangely though, may be I was in another place? For I did not understand it until I read the other comments, then it clicked!

Comment is about My Elixir (blog)

Original item by Larisa Rzhepishevska

Hi, M.C.Newberry! Thank you so much for the comment and...showing my foolish mistake. lol I certainly wanted to write "stuff". With warmest wishes, Larisa

Comment is about My Elixir (blog)

Original item by Larisa Rzhepishevska

Short and neat (to coin a phrase!) and I like
the idea that clouds harbour the spirits of the
wayward departed.

Comment is about UNTITLED (blog)

Original item by NICK ARMBRISTER

Die hard romantics of the world unite!
Hootchie-Cootchie-Smootchie!!!

Comment is about Night & Day (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

"Love is the most intoxicating potion,
Take daily gaily, mixed with emotion!"
LR - Nice to see you in full imaginative flow.
(PS...I assume "staff" should be "stuff"?)

Comment is about My Elixir (blog)

Original item by Larisa Rzhepishevska

Up to your usual imaginative ((and skilful)
standard!
Talk about taking the pastiche!!

Comment is about Shandy Man (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Love the opening two lines!
All in all, a pleasing portent of winter.

Comment is about First Night Of Snow (blog)

Original item by Tom Harding

My reservations home in on the likes of Ken Clarke (72? WHY hasn't he retired?!) and the "entitled" image that so many of his kind of politician project. I've two words for those like him:
Make way!

Comment is about THE MAJOR POLITICAL PARTIES (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

You are quite right Julian. I have been expecting someone to pull me up on the point that I have used "few" when I am really referring to "fewer". I wrote this poem as a joke and the joke's on me. I've learned a lot from "pedants" and although I say I don't claim to be grammatically correct, that doesn't mean I don't care about it. I try my best with what I know.

I don't understand your last sentence. Who says working class equals thick?

Comment is about Few and Less (blog)

Original item by Karen Robinson

Hi Karen, welcome to WOL, I run the open mic nights in Bolton where WOL was founded, hope you like the site, its done me proud since joining 4 years ago! Performance poetry, running gigs, playing guitar!

Enjoyed your dentist poem, not a million miles from something I wrote - see link (and still perform as a good punk rant) 3 years ago

best wishes Jeff X

http://www.writeoutloud.net/public/blogentry.php?blogentryid=3611

Comment is about Karen Robinson (poet profile)

Original item by Karen Robinson

Heh he! Great.

We share the driving, he drives there and I drive back - always!

Comment is about Shandy Man (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Thank you all. It's a subject close to all our hearts it seems. I liked your poem John.

I have just got over the last visit which prompted this poem. I was in the chair for two hours in the end, but it was fine. Now I think I have another problem but I still don't want to go back!

Perhaps I should give them a copy.

Comment is about The Dentist (blog)

Original item by Karen Robinson

I love this poem, your use of metaphor is excellent, especially when you move from abstract images - the elements, death - to the tactile images of human touch. The ending's really powerful, too. Beautiful writing :)

Irina

Comment is about Inanimate (blog)

Original item by Marianne Daniels

Thanks for taking a look at my poem Tom. Glad you liked it. It's good to see you back posting as well!

Comment is about Tom Harding (poet profile)

Original item by Tom Harding

This is lovely. You do capture that lovely hush of falling snow. I see what Harry means about the static - no doubt that has assocations for you - are you trying to find an original image for warmth, I wonder?

An enjoyable read, even though it heralds a winter I'm not much looking forward to.

Comment is about First Night Of Snow (blog)

Original item by Tom Harding