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Jonnie Falafel

Updated: Mon, 13 Mar 2017 12:34 pm

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Poet, essayist, sceptic - vegan who knows you can't get an ought from an is. Drummed out of the Tufty Club and cycling proficiency badge rescinded for jay walking. Rabbi at the Beth Midler synagogue in downtown Tehran until his rebellion against the hetero-normative patriarchy was brought to the attention of the anti-happiness committee. Their judgement, written in Pitman's shorthand was handed down just after the Rabbi had left town beneath a tarpaulin on the back of a jeep driven by a Zoroastran well-wisher. He fetched up in Finchley where a poem he composed from cut up management bollocks won first prize from the Jack Kerouac School of Disembodied Poetics. He's hoping to remedy dire economic straits with the right words in the right places. For now he contents himself with interpreting the morning toast for renegade Catholics. A graduate of the School of Zen Retribution he believes it's not a crime to change your mind or anyone else's. He enjoys upsetting dietary micro-managers and is considering becoming poet in residence for the Monday Club notwithstanding a better offer.


Hung Out To Dry If God the father sent Christ to die For the sins of you and I, Wear a crown of thorns, bleed and cry Oh dad you've hung me out to dry, Forsaken me, nailed me high (heave and sigh) - Then I don't understand the truth, Of this cosmic act of child abuse. Where one cannot do otherwise, blame Cannot be assigned. Judas & the Jews Constrained, fitted up, put in the frame, A suicide null and void. A ghastly charade, Of holy smoke and mirrors. What conclusions should we draw from this? What moral has been overlooked? What meaning was missed? That conscience makes penitents of us In the end? Your old man doesn't Always attend to your best interests? Your friends will sell you to the enemy? That the game plan depends upon a whim? That a god who made all laws is bound by them? Pause. For thought. When it comes To religion I'm wise enough to know That once the cat's out of the bag It's best to let it go. If God is good, and omnipotent Yet evil exists, Then either he's not good, nor all powerful Or he has a hand in it.

All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.

Audio entries by Jonnie Falafel

Scraping The Barrel (A Villanelle) (08/01/2014)

Hung Out To Dry (28/12/2013)

The Absolute Need (03/09/2013)

For A Second I Forgot #2 (04/08/2013)

Apolide ~ (For Gregg) (15/07/2013)

Camp (22/06/2013)

The Poem Fails (20/05/2013)

Peter Goes West (17/05/2013)

Clock Watchers In The Woods (05/05/2013)

Save Ulster From Sodomy (05/05/2013)

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keith jeffries

Sun 12th Mar 2017 22:36

Jonnie, It was only a few days ago that I joined Word Out Loud and came across your work. I loved every line, roared with laughter only to be caught by the truth. I also enjoyed looking at all the photos. I hope to read more of your poetry and perhaps one day have the privilege of meeting you. Many thanks for brightening up my day. Keith

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Ian Whiteley

Tue 14th May 2013 19:08

Thanks for your kind comments on 'eyrie avenue' jonnie - glad you liked it - i hope it stayed just on this side of eerie - and the pay-off is the thought of what/who else is behind those other twitching curtains.
You know - I'd never even thought about the dual connotation of 'horny' and now I do I want to change it :-)

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Martin Peacock

Mon 13th May 2013 22:07

Cheers for the comments Johnnie. Me too: I love the discipline of tight rhythm and rhyme - it makes me think about my native language in an expansive way. Although I write in free verse too I believe that one shouldn't think of oneself as a poet until structured poetry has been...well, if not mastered then at least taken to task. Is that a contradictory principle for a revolutionary socialist to hold? I can picture many poets thinking me a reactionary fuddy duddy for holding that opinion, but I'd argue that I simply love my craft, this artistic enterprise called poetry too much to be slipshod, to settle for 'just' or 'always' writing free.

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Cathy Bryant

Sat 11th May 2013 21:12

We have some things in common! I used to live in the West Midlands (Kenilworth) and I'm a vegan too. I don't know if you were raised Catholic as well, but your poems, particularly Hung Out to Dry, really struck me. Wonderful work. Best wishes. x

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Ann Foxglove

Thu 9th May 2013 13:32

Hi Johnie - what a jolly good surname Falafel is! Glad to see you using the blogs - hope you are enjoying the site!

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