Hi again Hazel. I am back on again, a bit like the squirrel which keeps taking our nuts and seeds off of the garden table. I am intrigued how vital and expansive poetry is seen to be on the one hand, and on the other how closely guarded its tenets might seem . I feel that is a bit like dropping a stone in water and watching the expanding circles. Graham and Colin exemplify the opposite ends of the same spectrum. I've shot my bolt once, so I retire discreetly to the touch line. The simple truth is that poetry is a shape shifter and a mood shifter, so coming back to a poem can often seem like p.....g in the wind. (IMO). We have to be open to opinions, that's what gives life to the site.
Ray
Comment is about Drawn by Dragons (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
Really interesting comments. I think I will be writing more versions of this poem, each in a different direction and see what feels most true in the end. Thanks you for taking the time.
Comment is about Drawn by Dragons (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
Thank you all for your kind and supportive comments ?
Comment is about The moth with hob nailed boots (blog)
Original item by Red Button
No, that's just the deadline, Niamh. Send yours in as soon as it's ready!
Comment is about Fantastic competition for Young Poets! (article)
Original item by Mike Took
<Deleted User> (18118)
Sat 12th May 2018 08:44
<Deleted User> (13762)
Sat 12th May 2018 08:33
Frances, I have to say your last comment sent a bit of a shiver down my spine. I think if I had been told that at the start of a degree in poetry I may well have dropped out the very next day. While I understand and agree in part to the general principle I can't help but think it also illustrates much of what is or has been wrong with poetry and its teaching.
For surely it tempts the writer into cloaking their words with intellectualism that may well have the effect of alienating a percentage of readers? This perception of inaccessibility has plagued poetry for decades, modern art too. How many people have a clue what most modern, conceptual or performance art is all about?
I can think of many reasons for explaining the content of a poem within the poem itself - historical context for one - so to live and breathe by such a constraint seems somewhat counter-productive and restricting to me.
There are times when I feel a desperate need to connect directly and instantaneously with the reader so description and explanation are the tools I would employ. At other times I prefer to remain at a distance and allow for a greater degree of interpretation. Either way, to have that flexibility and freedom has always been my personal motivation to express myself through writing.
Thank heavens for the internet which has helped blow away the need for most of these rules and regulations and made poetry truly accessible to all.
Personally I like both elements of Hazel's poem and I feel both complement each other and make a whole. The technique of writing from two different angles for me is one I like a lot as it can shift a poem suddenly into another dimension, the reader's mind too, uncomfortably even. As it stands I feel this poem is far more accessible to a wider audience than if it was reduced to the last 5 lines. But hey, we all see things in different ways and that's why poetry has multiple potentials.
Col.
Comment is about Drawn by Dragons (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
Yes, Brian, I am anti-begggar too, but maybe in a different way... They make me think of all that I have and how most people can live comfortably in this rich country of ours, but others, for a whole variety of reasons, don't. Health, home, job, family, food and safety are not to be underestimated.
Comment is about Stu of the Steps (blog)
Original item by mike booth
<Deleted User> (13740)
Sat 12th May 2018 05:30
Put into poetry a feeling that's hard to put into words, and you've done it inexplicably well. It's really relatable. Great. Thanks
Comment is about Organic Brain Syndrome. (blog)
Original item by Nick
The structures quite all over the place but it's supposed to sound quite broken up - I think enjambement is effective for more 'emotional poems. Idk
Comment is about Full Circle (blog)
Original item by Niamh k.
Hi, so do you post the entries on the 31st and not anytime before?
Comment is about Fantastic competition for Young Poets! (article)
Original item by Mike Took
Thanks Hannah. Yes, a sad case in an unfathomable world.
No doubt the psychoanalysts would have an answer.
Ray
Comment is about CLINGING TO CONVENTION (blog)
Original item by ray pool
<Deleted User> (18118)
Fri 11th May 2018 22:20
Sadly eccentric. I love the imagery.
I wonder if this is a real person or a creation?
Either way I 'm sure there are people like this and we wouldn't know what to say but somehow I am glad they're there.
Hannah
Comment is about CLINGING TO CONVENTION (blog)
Original item by ray pool
Almost like a figure from Spike Milligan's mind RB. An irresistible poem with plenty of salt and vinegar on it.
Ray
Comment is about The moth with hob nailed boots (blog)
Original item by Red Button
Mark, this surprises me after a career of daily recording of notes on the beat etc. We've all been to that dark place of memory wipeout. Torch, pen and jotter - and a more settled sleep....
Ray
Comment is about NIGHTY-NIGHT! (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
A perfect example of how rhyming simple lines makes us feel good and satisfied. Thank goodness for the Betjemanesque soliloquys of the past. May nostalgia thrive forever Ian. I like the fact that the last two lines give that sense of security we have now largely lost in the workplace. We've always had capitalists, but in that world of social values they never falsely raised our hopes, nor pretended to set us free.
Ray
Comment is about Sunset Over Lupset (August 1968) (blog)
Original item by Ian Whiteley
Points well made Rachel. I just wanted to tease the imagination rather than try to expand too much on any aspect of this distressing condition. Much has been written on the subject. I meant orientation as a state of mind based on recognition of time and place, often disturbed. Thanks for your reasoned response.
You must have that in a diary somewhere, Brian. Ha Ha!
I agree with you there Col. No compassion in news unless it is used to raise guilt it seems to me. I was an extra on EastEnders once, and Barbara had a habit of speaking off the cuff on film to non talking artists so that they could get a talking part fee which was far higher.(Not in my case!) She is salt of the earth.
Well done for sussing that interpretation. I think maybe first person would have changed the feel a lot; often that works I agree.
Thanks a lot.
Thank you all for liking: Anonybus, Desmond, Anya, Damon.
Ray
Comment is about THE MEMORY THIEF (blog)
Original item by ray pool
FOMO more dangerous than greed or lust! What marketing degrees are based on.
Comment is about The Fear Of Missing Out. (blog)
Original item by Matt Tyldesley
Don’t change it. It’s what you wrote.
Comment is about Drawn by Dragons (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
One of the first things I learnt at uni when studying poetry was that you should never explain your poem - the words should be strong enough to speak for themselves.
Comment is about Drawn by Dragons (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
Ian,
thank you for this poem which speaks of a very English idyll. It is perfectly rhymed and takes the reader directly to the place you have so eloquently described, both now and on many occasions in the past. Well done and thank you again.
Keith
Comment is about Sunset Over Lupset (August 1968) (blog)
Original item by Ian Whiteley
<Deleted User> (16099)
Fri 11th May 2018 18:18
where have you gone and when are you coming back?
Comment is about Chiari Warrior Soldier (poet profile)
Original item by Chiari Warrior Soldier
G'day Cynthia,
Yes, I was lucky... thanks for the compliments.
I don't drink either, but happy to share the atmosphere and listen to the poetic sentiments expressed with abandon.
Never really been a pub-goer either except between workshops in Ireland as mentioned and when I was a student nurse - again, to drink in the atmosphere.
Comment is about 'Epitaph for Gregory O'Donoghue' by Frances Macaulay Forde is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
thanks for the comments on 'This Is The News' Mark - I'm glad it's not just me that gets irritated by these modern traits ?
Ian
Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
Thanks, Hannah - it was fun being constrained by the form -glad you thought it worked. To me reading the finished poem, I thought the repetition seems to pull you further in with each verse.
Comment is about The Artist [1] (blog)
Original item by Chris Armstrong
You're right about the wit, MC. And the political satire I hear at Open Mics contains no wit. And here is the proof. People smirk because the joke is on the Right. Would they do so if the same joke was on the Left? If not, it wasn't Wit. It was self-affirmation.
Comment is about SUBVERSIVE VERSE (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
<Deleted User> (18118)
Fri 11th May 2018 15:25
<Deleted User> (18118)
Fri 11th May 2018 15:24
He's a tough one.
He's not scared of a rolled up newspaper, that's for sure.
Great stuff.
Hannah
Comment is about The moth with hob nailed boots (blog)
Original item by Red Button
<Deleted User> (18118)
Fri 11th May 2018 15:11
This does happen, sometimes a whole poem and then in the morning - gone.
Thank you so much for your comment on my new poem. Much appreciated.
Hannah
Comment is about NIGHTY-NIGHT! (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
"He's a bouncer at the ugly bug ball on Saturday nights "
? ? ?
Comment is about The moth with hob nailed boots (blog)
Original item by Red Button
Brilliant. Happens to me almost every night! Nicely put
Comment is about NIGHTY-NIGHT! (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
Wonderful! Well done and congratulations Albert!
I certainly look forward to reading more of your work.
Comment is about ‘Backpacking in Nepal, June 1971’ by Albert Tatlock is our Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by steve pottinger
Huge congratulations on 'Poem of the Week'.
(Again, I missed this announcement!)
Very well deserved!
Comment is about 'The Robin' by Charlotte Bergman is Write Out Loud's new Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by steve pottinger
Hi Keith. I just wanted to echo everything everyone else has said. It means so much that you read/rate our/my stuff. You're like the WOL gardener, watering the seeds.
Thank you, Keith.
Comment is about keith jeffries (poet profile)
Original item by keith jeffries
Or...Bottoms Up!
Hugh - your blogs seem perfect for a volume of entertaining
frivolity markedly absent today.
Comment is about How Fred passed away and ended up as a bike rest (blog)
Original item by hugh
All words in this great poetical world need to be...
1. Considered and carefully researched.
2. Suitable.
3. Thought through, corrected and revised as necessary.
4. Presented with respect for the material and the
intelligence of their prospective audience.
It's all not about rabble-rousing and playing to the gallery.
Speaker's Corner here - or one of the numerous marches/
demonstrations this great city allows - provides a venue for that sort of thing!
Of course, I will always lean towards stuff that contains
that all-too-absent quality - WIT - wherever it may emerge.
Comment is about SUBVERSIVE VERSE (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Many thanks Mae, Keith, Tahira and Cynthia for these encouraging and supportive comments, much appreciated!
Comment is about Simon Zonenblick (poet profile)
Original item by Simon Zonenblick
Damon,
a poem from a heart in anguish and well expressed. Thank you
Keith
Comment is about Outside (blog)
Original item by Damon Blackery
Matt,
this poem has a quality about it which I find fascinating and certainly worth a second if not third read. Well done and thank you. More?
Keith
Comment is about The Fear Of Missing Out. (blog)
Original item by Matt Tyldesley
Matt,
thank you for commenting on my poem The Suburban Jungle. It is much appreciated.
Keith
Comment is about Matt Tyldesley (poet profile)
Original item by Matt Tyldesley
Thank you both for your kind words. It gets addictive after a while, even if it does blur the lines between enjoyment and madness! ?
Comment is about Two Tribes (blog)
Original item by Matt Tyldesley
<Deleted User> (13762)
Fri 11th May 2018 08:29
watching the news yesterday I was saddened that a clip of Barbara Windsor viciously slapping an Eastenders character in the face and shouting 'get out my pub' should have been chosen to highlight her acting career in a report about her dementia. Talk about normalising violence and stereotyping! My heart sank.
I like this poem lots as it is a subject that is relevant to everyone, or will be one day. Perhaps it could me made more powerful by making it first person? I like also the fact that the memory thief has no memory of his own reckless actions but goes merrily on casting other's to the wind seemingly at random. Science would argue that it's not that random but it often seems that way.
Good and thoughtful stuff Raymondo. Col.
Comment is about THE MEMORY THIEF (blog)
Original item by ray pool
<Deleted User> (18980)
Fri 11th May 2018 07:35
I did an Improve Your Memory course once...when was it now, and where?
Comment is about THE MEMORY THIEF (blog)
Original item by ray pool
elPintor
Fri 11th May 2018 00:04
It seems this must be about senility, with it's mention of "another grey head". Though, one can't help but be reminded of the fragility of memory, itself. Of how it can be erased, manipulated, or even created from nothing. And, then, you venture on to speak of "orientation" as a sort of affect of memory, or lack of memory...
..contemplating many psychological and philosophical questions due to the reading, Ray. It's a succinct piece of writing that begs examination of its subtleties to make it complete.
Rachel
Comment is about THE MEMORY THIEF (blog)
Original item by ray pool
You hit on another of my pet hates, Albert. "Here's one I've just written" "This is still a work-in-progress" (So don't pester us with it till it's finished).
I've even seen people writing out a poem while other performers are on.
a) it's rank bad manners
b) it will be shite.
Comment is about SUBVERSIVE VERSE (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Nice poem .. I too hope the hope for the future is not denied through racism hate and all things destructive, but no matter how ugly the world can be, it’s undeniably beautiful too x
Comment is about No bright future (blog)
Original item by Hasmukh Mehta
Cynthia Buell Thomas
Sat 12th May 2018 17:02
Well-thought and well-put!
Comment is about THE MEMORY THIEF (blog)
Original item by ray pool