Builder's Shitty What a Pity

Builder cannot take a joke

What a crying pity

Incapable of joshing round

He just gets really shitty

He hasn't yet quite worked out

That when he counteracts

With fangs and fire and venom

I'll just keep coming back

(Seems bit dense to me...)

The Builder he has made himself

A target for satire

It's just all bluster, ...

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Improving my Poetry with Help from the Temple Builder

Been told don't know what poetry is what it isn't

By the great Temple Builder and Preacher

Guess that's what I get for living upside-

Down with a pretty bad teacher

The following excerpt he tells me

Is poetry inspired from above

I'm trying my hardest to understand it

This poem, which I know I should love

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Spruiking for the Temple (a light-hearted satirical look)

Preamble

Based on information provided in 'Aspiring Poets Wanted' Temple of Indomitable Poetry Thurs 17 Jan. I make no apology for the inclusion of satire in my work when I believe it is justified.

I understood Write Out Loud was a poetry site for writers to post their poems.  'Aspiring Poets Wanted'  was not a poem but simply...

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The Temple Builder and the Pimp Cup

The Temple Builder says that he likes

A good book of rhymes (which is fine)

Accompanied by something called a 'pimp cup'

Had to Google, was this related to wine?

I hope I have pic'ed out the right cup

You gave me no clue which to choose

Not knowing this thing called a pimp cup

I didn't know which one which was youse

I th...

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Latest Temple Publicity Material

Because I showed interest in Temple

It's Builder sent pub-licity

I couldn't believe what my eyes saw

Lying on floor in front of me

If this is what hides in the Temple

Nymphs on the floor reading poems

All clad in diaphanous garments

I wanna join up and go show 'em

Show 'em my ability to rhyme

While admiring nymphs lying ...

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Boris Is a New Man

Boris is a new man

He's lost a lot of weight

He's lopped his mop of trademark hair

New lover guiding fate?

Boris has upgraded

To 1.8 mill flat

Accompanied by lover

Well I'll be, how 'bout that

Divorce talks are emerging

His marriage to Ms Wheeler

Although surviving many bumps

It seems is now 'no dealer'

Sources say that ...

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Golly Gosh Big Sal

Golly gosh Big Sal

You've gone and found another

One I had forgotten 'bout

My young and lost young brother

I'm sorry my dear readers

To see my brother's pic

'Dog Day Afternoon' by Sal

Is where you'll have to click

Sal tries to pass my brother

Off as Stephen King

But surely I, his brother

Would know our own offspring?

Big...

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Temple Builder. I Do Object

I read something the other day

To which I do object

I found it out of order

'Cause me it did affect

The Temple Builder did suggest

The Rhymers Club did not

Write poems which were meaningful

But play and tommy rot

I would suggest the Builder

Go look at what we wrote

It was a mix of serious/fun

Unlike the Builder's quote

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Befuddled

At times I get befuddled

Spinning round and round

C'mon can you blame me?

I'm living upside down

I'ts OK you UK'ers

And you in gay Francee

I don't have your northern clime

To keep me fuddle free

I'm rhyming in this fuddled state

With glass of white in hand

Purpose? Just to send a smile

From my upside-down land

So what will happen...

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UK's Best Days

It is fascinating to watch the overtures

Of Britain now it's 'close to the wire'

On the one hand planning naval bases in Singapore

Wanting return to an Empire

On the other hand they still want some cream

That life on the EU did bring

Like slipping 'cross the channel for holidays

In Portugal and Spain in the spring

In reality it's the painful...

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Losing Personal Interaction

I wonder if the human race it will ever

Live to one day and regret

The march towards it's entire existence

Controlled by the powerful internet?

Soon it will be possible to transact

All your business without leaving home

There'll be no reason to go out your front door

No reason to go out and roam

Having been brought up on human i...

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Skittish not British

The rhymes I often write here

Can be a little skittish

I'm sure I let your Queenie down

Not well-refined, not British

Just give me little rope WOLers

And let me do my thing

While riding kangaroos around

Ding-a-ling-a-ling

The silly season's got him

Our poet's lost the plot

40 degrees has got to him

That's sorta bloody hot

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Wretch-ed and Fetch-ed

Where's the fun gone from the site?

It's serious , so boringly wretched

It seems the more serious the better

More likes and more comments is fetch-ed

I know wretched/ fetch-ed makes no sense

They make nonsense verse 'tween us both

Pray may I end with some Shakespeare nonsense?

There needs more WOL fun I quote doth

Don Matthews Decemb...

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Our Sheep are Clever. We Teach Them

the ABC

We breed our sheep real smart here

We teach them how to spell

We start them off with ABC

Then sentence them as well

I know you think I'm joking

Well let me introduce

This farmer who's a teacher

To all his sheep, (called Bruce)

This farmer in our outback

Is creating art with sheep

The art is going viral

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I Just Don't Give a Fuck

Preamble

Please excuse my use of this language

but it is the language used by these sort of people

We're messing up the planet

With all our human muck

It makes me angry when you say

I just don't give a fuck

Just toss that plastic bottle

The one that you just sucked

It makes me angry when you say

So what? Just go get fuck...

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Please Pass the Truffles

We don't care 'bout millions of people

Being killed, oppressed, let 'em eat cake

As long as we can still have our caviar

Could you please pass the truffles to partake?

Don Matthews January 2018

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Rhymer Club's Collapsed, Kaputt

I've sad news to relate

The Rhymer Club's kaputt

It hit a bloody brick wall

And lost it's metric foot

The damage it was so great

For us to try repair

Some changed their appearance

Some went here, some there

Was quite a cultured club it was

Creating rhyme each Sat

It's quality was impeccable

E.g. cat sat on mat

Bu...

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We're In For a Stinker

We're in for a stinker

One maybe two

On the temperature scale

Celsius 42

Kangaroo you're panting

Koala too

I'm cool here in aircon

Come in you two

I know you are longing

To cool down some more

There's just one proviso

Leave droppings at door

Don Matthews January 2018

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Has Anyone Seen My Brother?

Preamble

Brian's brother has just posted this as a heartfelt plea to all WOLers.  He  is pining and can't find his brother.

Has anyone seen my brother?

Can't find him on the site

It seems he's gone, just disappeared

Which is quite strange, not right

I went through all WOL's profiles

And no, he isn't there

It seems he has just vanishe...

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Venturing Into Controversial Poetry

I've been encouraged to venture into controversial

Poetry, and away from safe ground

Which is good as it questions fixed attitudes

That tend to tie us down, keep us bound

If we take this path though we must by mindful

That our poems don't hurt other's feelings

If they do we need to think of a way

Of bringing about some form of h...

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Over-Eating. Brian Wins the Challenge

Preamble

This weeks theme 'over-eating' was set by Brian.  What chance did I have?

I'm afraid I've a confession to make

I've done no preparation for this theme

I should have been gorging myself all the week

I've gone let down my Rhymers Team

It's OK for Brian to set theme

He had plenty of left-over pud

And there's phea...

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Sudden. Unexpected. (2)

Yesterday I wrote a poem

Sudden. Unexpected

I didn't know the reason why

Right then, (till someone texted)

my friend left early, not feeling right

diagnosed with advanced leukemia

a tumour accompanied the blood-killing cancer

dead in two weeks, life is cruel

Don Matthews January 2019

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Sudden. Unexpected

I've just lost a friend

No chance for goodbye

Why did it happen?

As yet don't know why

In a few days

I'll meet with some friends

Discover the why

Discover the end

Sudden, unexpected

No chance for goodbye

Life can be cruel

Inside I cry

Don Matthews January 2019

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Tomorrow Will Be 41

Tomorrow will be 41

Degrees, that's bloody hot

Table tennis cancelled

No-one to call “Great shot”

(Bother...)

I'm gonna have to find myself

A place to vegetate

Seek, absorb some coolness

41? I hate

I could stay home and turn on

The conditioner, cool the room

But this would make my electricity

Account hit roof - like zoo...

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In Time For Your Brekkie

Preamble

No I don't eat MacDonalds for brekkie

His grammar is hopeless

The Queen says he's dense

"He's only an Aussie"

Which explains it, makes sense

He seems to use me

A lot as his voice

But what can I say?

I don't have no choice

He sends words of wisdom

Grammatical or not

Wired up from Down Under

Off the press, (ho...

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