Poetry Blogs (2021, love's tempest)
I'm the one that's trying to tell you:-
This is all there ever will be.
Nothing you can say
Can change a thing,
I know everything about me.
Don't waste your time and
Don't waste your breath.
You think you want to help, but I
Know that's an empty threat.
I am the one, trying to show you:-
I live everything extreme.
Now you think I am being
Too hard on you, but
Cut me and I bleed.
Sunday 9th May 2021 7:23 am
These bloodless wounds will never heal.
"Father Time, save me."
I grow so weak as the not-blood spills.
"Mother Nature, cure me."
Rock me. Wash me. Make me clean again.
Saturday 8th May 2021 10:23 am
There is no time for the pillow to dry,
There is no hope, that's why I cry.
There is no future for all I see.
There are no perks,
To being me.
I would talk to myself if I had anything to say
I would comfort myself, did I think there was a way
To stay sane.
But what to believe?
All I can hear are the scr...
Friday 7th May 2021 7:56 am
There reaches that point
When you reach for the pills.
The things that you won't
The world thinks that you will.
The waiting for freedom
Is not soon enough.
The paying for wisdom
Is costing too much.
And there's nothing left.
Thursday 6th May 2021 3:58 am
Cocked and fired, cannon explodes.
Your cavalry charge this valley.
Shot, down in flames, you take me
Surrendered or fighting.
I fuel you, another charge.
Your war cry echoes
This death dance.
Do you take prisoners
Wednesday 5th May 2021 9:08 am
It is time to introduce a new sub-theme in Love's Tempest - depression. Undoubtedly the upcoming depression poems are intricately related to most of the prior themes in Love's Tempest, but there's space to ponder that perhaps through self-love alone, depression is always related to Love's Tempest. I don't know if that is true as I haven't experienced every type or every cause of depression that th...
Tuesday 4th May 2021 9:10 am
When there's nothing more to say
But your mind just keeps on talking,
When there's nothing left to feel,
You can always feel the same.
When there's nothing else to do,
There must be something you could be doing,
When there's nothing left to try,
You can always try again
But I can't take the pain,
And I can't take the sorrow,
Monday 3rd May 2021 3:47 am
I don't suppose you'll cry to lose
A broken heart.
There's certainly no use in tears
On spilt milk.
But teddy bears are often loved
The more for being old and used,
And holes give special comfort to
Those shoes unfit to walk in.
Why not accept the truth?
Even apples are despised and scorned
Sunday 2nd May 2021 3:54 am
How precious will you say I am?
It was care to hold me as you did.
It was cotton wool to dry my tears,
And hard steel to start them.
And yes protect me from the world.
Yes yes, protect me from myself.
It's wise to know these precious jewels,
And carelessness to drop them.
And will you call me muchly loved?
How softly do you claim to tread?
It's gales around this house of cards!
Saturday 1st May 2021 3:38 am
I stood in the wind for you,
The gale that blew my love away.
You watched me from your crazy world,
And still I stood alone.
And then the rain fell, like my tears.
Still I stood upon that hill.
I waited for the sun to shine,
But still it never came.
I stood there while the white snow fell.
I stood there in the darkest night.
Yes - I'm glad you're warm inside,
I'm waiting in the freezi...
Friday 30th April 2021 2:28 am
You beckon to me.
Uncertain, and vaguely guilty.
And how you "know how I feel - but",
I can feel the urgency grip you.
And how we "don't have to if...",
I can feel the expectation.
You touch me,
I can feel the inexperience.
Do you expect me
Suddenly to tell you
If you can.
Or suddenly to let you
If you can't.
Thursday 29th April 2021 8:16 am
We fight to first blood
But he has no weakness,
It will surely be me who loses.
One way, or another,
It will surely be me who bleeds or bruises.
There can be no lenience
Between me and my lover.
Wednesday 28th April 2021 2:53 am
The bloated She-whale lies
On a bed of roses.
Thorns prick her sides,
But her lover
He doesn't see, and he doesn't fear,
And because it doesn't hurt (him)
He books another year;
But the She-whale
Belly-up to the surface,
Because he didn't catch her.
Tuesday 27th April 2021 1:33 am
If I cry tonight - don't say you love me,
And when you can't show me -
That's why I cried.
And if you learn to tell me - maybe I won't listen.
I know myself too well.
Not well enough!
If I cry tonight - put your arms around me.
Say nothing -
But don't let me think.
Don't push me near this brink!
I could think so sharp to stab myself.
Monday 26th April 2021 1:51 am
I am a finger puppet.
He plays me in a mime.
Upon a sheeted stage we lie,
(about all kinds of things).
If words tug strings.
Sunday 25th April 2021 5:00 am
A gap in the storm:
After the unrequited love, there were a couple of fledgling relationships in the summer before university. Whatever I may have felt during those relationships, there are no poems from them.
As much as I may have wanted to write 'a cheerful poem', cheerful poems were not my forte then.
The relationship I was in before heading off to university may have been sweet and deve...
Saturday 24th April 2021 2:09 pm
I've sat up a tree for days and no-one noticed.
Neither the few who wandered underneath,
Nor the even fewer who should have cared.
Enough to realise I was missing!
And no-one came searching.
Time has no meaning, when the bark is pressing
Into the base of your spine.
And trees don't have cushions!
After the first hours, you only know you are there
Because you can't feel your feet.
Friday 23rd April 2021 8:34 am
There are no colours,
Time weights my lids.
And soon I see nothing more than time.
If you do not hold me,
I will be cold.
If you are not near,
How will I tell you all these things that I think?
There are no thoughts,
Dreams fill my brain.
Soon I, incapable of reason, will be permanently lost.
If you are not there,
I will be cold.
If you do not want me,
What use, all these things...
Thursday 22nd April 2021 8:29 am
Come then, Victory.
This lady has done with Darkness.
Is too full of sadness.
But the war rages on,
She has no control.
It isn't as she wishes.
"Come then.", saith the night,
"Take up this shroud of blackness."
She does its bidding.
"Come then.", saith blackest night.
"I am the Harness."
Wednesday 21st April 2021 9:21 am
Although there are still two more poems to be met in the unrequited love sub-theme of love's tempest it is chronologically correct to open up new sub-themes of 'friendship' or 'platonic love', and 'self-love' or 'self-esteem', these themes often intertwine and overlap.
I thought about whether to just finish the unrequited love theme and then return to this first of the friendship poems, but I t...
Tuesday 20th April 2021 9:37 am
Yet what is dreaming?
A spoken word. A broken friendship.
Heart burns. The party's ended.
The kind advance met with confusion,
There's nothing left to do, but ...
Monday 19th April 2021 8:59 am
I am like all those other lonely women;
My eyes are closing, from the stinging.
I am ageing with the best of them,
I am growing veined, waiting.
My HEART is a cog turning,
I have BARBED WIRE for a stomach.
My legs are PISTONS burning,
My GUTS are rubber.
And all my parts are rusted, aged, breaking;
Even my technology is out-dated.
My teeth are RAZORS, biting.
My EYES are funnels...
Sunday 18th April 2021 8:04 am
You took the sweet-lipped child
as she slept in innocence.
As she danced, with the daisies in her hair,
at a picnic party.
The sour-mouthed woman
rises from the broken fragments.
And now you wonder.
And now you back away in horror.
The woman stands alone among you.
The anger ...
Saturday 17th April 2021 2:50 am
I know what the future holds.
No warm embraces for this weary heart.
The shades of night breathe welcome to the day.
The memories flicker, with the firelight.
The sadness fades.
The blackness hides within.
I am one with nothing, once again.
But pain is free,
And I'll take any bargain, so it seems.
I'm wondering something in me hasn't changed,
I cannot weep.
I've had the anger.
My eyes ...
Friday 16th April 2021 4:02 am
And are you he?
No shadow softened sun
Could ever cause this fire in my heart
Nor too, the lingering ember in the grate.
Oh, it is not the culprit that I seek -
That seeks me too.
Oh, tell me, is it you?
Thursday 15th April 2021 9:09 am
I've been falling apart for a union.
Didn't mind my mind's intrusion.
But, I've been dreaming about solutions.
Running the race in the wrong direction.
Living for a figment of my own imagination.
For no reason.
I've been walking the line of indecision.
Toying around wi...
Wednesday 14th April 2021 8:38 am
We are both naive young fools.
You do not see
What is in front of your face,
And I do not hear
What is behind my own.
We are both amateur players,
In a game with no rules.
You missed your sights,
But you shot me through,
I am blinded by you.
Tuesday 13th April 2021 4:00 am
There are no longer words.
I have grown ancient listening.
I have grown a maze of wrinkles,
If my eyes seem dull,
Remember they have forgotten you,
I sit, and watch the hunting.
Come and join me,
Monday 12th April 2021 4:57 am
Can I help it, if I think you're beautiful?
If I love you,
Must I spend my whole life being sorry?
When you smile,
Something twists inside me.
Something fragile, so it ought to break
Can I help it, if I think you're special?
If your name excites me,
Must I always try to hide it?
The cynic in me tries to squash it;
Dulls my voice, and makes me stiffen.
Makes my gaze see...
Sunday 11th April 2021 4:01 am
It should not be a sad thing,
To be a friend.
But I cry at night, on an empty pillow.
And every day I dream about you,
And see your face, in shadows.
It should not be a bad thing,
To be a friend.
But every night I dream about you.
And in the day, I cry without you,
And give myself to sorrow.
It should not be so maddening
Saturday 10th April 2021 3:30 am
Show me the year it was -
I'll show you the seventeen it wasn't,
And the eternity it never will be, that follows.
Show me the memories -
I'll show you the smiles forgotten,
And the shattered illusions, broken fragments.
Show me the point in living -
And I will cut my throat on it!
Don't you know everyone's dying?
It's all the rage.
Recognise the sound...
Friday 9th April 2021 8:58 am
I want to write a cheerful poem.
I want to sing a song of joy.
And clap my hands,
And throw my caution to the wind,
Not this misery, I.
I'd wear a dress of red and gold.
All laced up,
All softly flowing.
I want to joke, and laugh, and talk,
And brave this storm.
Not go in black,
Not me, this wreck;
Thursday 8th April 2021 4:54 am
She tried to smile,
She practiced it at home at night.
And how she'd act,
She tried to speak as if it were alright.
She even smiled,
but mostly at herself.
They didn't care.
They didn't even notice how she felt.
She found that funny too.
She practiced for that aim.
As if it were the only goal in life,
She wished they'd wonder, all the same.
She wasn't brave,
Wednesday 7th April 2021 9:04 am
On a broken stone, in a wide wild ocean,
A breaking girl, in a sea of tears.
A broken heart, and half a notion
To break away the rest of her years.
But the breaking stone refused to split,
And the roaring waves refused to bite.
So all alone,
And lonelier yet,
For nothing would take her life.
She thought of sleeping
Till she drifted away,
And so she did -
And so she did.
She laid ...
Tuesday 6th April 2021 12:59 am
Note: This is probably the most embarassing of the poems in the sub-theme of 'Unrequited Love'
(Although there are a few other strong contenders)
But, I wouldn't be doing the audience or the theme any justice if I were to omit this one.
(I'm not sure if it is the zenith or the nadir)
So, if you read on, don't say you were not warned.
Monday 5th April 2021 11:58 am
Can't get you out of my mind.
Can't halt your stay in my mind.
Can't halt my mind.
Can't hold my breath.
Can't hug death.
Sunday 4th April 2021 11:37 am
Time to visit my 17 year old self, for the next sub-theme in Love's Tempest of 'Unrequited Love'.
With low self-esteem and low social confidence it was kind of inevitable.
But that's not the only way this particular storm can brew.
This first poem in the sub-theme, 'Reckless Abandon' is presented in two forms.
In its original version, and as a shaped poem.
The original version
Saturday 3rd April 2021 11:45 am
I have captured the beauty of the sun,
But you do not look.
Here in my heart lies the serenity of heaven,
Yet you are so far away.
Lone bird. Circling through,
Stare into a blazing sky,
To catch a flash of dark.
Tied to this earth,
I am wrapped in flames of desire
For a touch that never happens.
Fights with the wind,
We swoop so...
Friday 2nd April 2021 4:35 am
Now that there are no more words to hurl,
And silence stalks the corridors of my world...
I think of all the things I could have said,
Instead of all the things I did to hurt you.
So now that all that angry fire has left,
And raindrops on the window only mirror tears I've shed,
I sit and watch blurred raindrops fall,
And where you sat, no-one sits instead.
Now that there are no more card...
Wednesday 31st March 2021 3:40 am
Across the great divide of separate minds,
We've formed a fragile thread, a fragile bond.
We walk alone, say nothing, do not touch,
We make no obvious statements, promise not.
So it is not a burden, that we love,
We ask no personal questions, tell no lies.
We beg no favours, need no other thing,
We are the products of a violent world.
A world where double locks are not enough,
Tuesday 30th March 2021 11:09 am
The river that divides us stretches far as the eye can see,
Nor is there end, nor crossing place. Save for a wooden stare
Supported by the tide of previous tears,
That ebbs and flows and heaves against it's creaking boards.
People may try to dismantle the steps we took.
Now that the boards are washed away, we do not even care
Enough to stop them when they want their wood.
We do not need s...
Monday 29th March 2021 1:02 pm
The next sub-theme in Love's Tempest is 'Imaginary Relationships'.
Before you begin to experience love, you think about it a bit, imagine what it might be like.
And at that age too, you're being asked to write stories a lot and poems a little bit at school.
Practicing story telling and poetry writing and thinking about love, it all merges together...
This first one experiments with sonnet form...
Sunday 28th March 2021 3:12 pm
The boys in the street mend their cars.
A miniature garage, it seems.
I feel like crying, I feel so alone,
No-one to mourn me when I am gone.
No-one to miss me, no-one to care.
I pound at the walls, but no-one is there.
And if they are there, then no-one hears.
And if they hear, then no-one cares.
No-one to care, no-one to cry,
If I live, If I die.
The boys in the street are at it agai...
Saturday 27th March 2021 10:11 am
While waiting for the bus to school,
I came upon the weighty problem
Of what to do with my hands and feet.
Unused to such quandries and puzzles,
I first thought the answer to be
Simple, like hands in pockets, and stand on feet.
But unbidden, there came to my mind
A picture of myself, standing on my feet.
A plump girl, with her hands in her pockets.
At last I could stand it no longer
Friday 26th March 2021 12:58 pm
I will be embarking now on a sequence of poems, in chronological and thematic order, that will stretch back right towards some of my earliest poetry. The collective theme is 'Love's Tempest', within which there will be various sub-themes. We start with the sub-theme 'Beginnings'.
Although this particular poem was probably written when I was 19 or 20 years old, it talks about earlier chidhood. I...
Thursday 25th March 2021 1:38 pm
They say hope is such a wonderful thing
Keeps us strong against anything
But be careful what you hope for
Or it will do you in.
So many times I thought I understood
Who people were, and what was good
Only to find, what's left behind
Is broken dreams.
And they say grief is a natural thing
As we get used to what's missing
And find out how to do without
What we used to need.
Saturday 20th February 2021 10:51 am
Maybe light was once kind
To the baby moth.
Perhaps, it never fully learned
How it had changed
Into the enemy.
Is this why it must return again?
Flap its fragile wings,
Once more, against the pain,
Even until the very last time,
“Be as you were”
Saturday 5th December 2020 12:56 pm