Little typo maybe? 2nd line, 2nd verse - should that be detritus?
Despairing, this. Almost bleeding.
Comment is about Castaway (blog)
Original item by Steven Kenny
Elaine - thank you for all your comments. I thought at first that gmail was playing up, or you'd edited one comment several times - until I clicked on each link hehe. Doh.
You picked up on maw and paw :-)) Yees...never my favourite person, to put it mildly!
Your nod of recognition...have you written about yours?
Thanks again Elaine for taking the time to read them and comment
Laura x
Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)
Original item by Elaine
You've captured him perfectly..thank you xxx
Comment is about Jake (This poem was written for a very dear friend on the loss of her true and faithful friend) (blog)
Original item by Gus Jonsson
I think there is more to this one than meets the eye Gus. 'Barking at the stars' - I love that expression - that could describe a lot of us poets. x
Comment is about Jake (This poem was written for a very dear friend on the loss of her true and faithful friend) (blog)
Original item by Gus Jonsson
love it, Gus.. Sure you told me about this when I saw you last month (reminds me I am off end of the month - will pop round for a hour or two if you are around)?? A
Comment is about Jake (This poem was written for a very dear friend on the loss of her true and faithful friend) (blog)
Original item by Gus Jonsson
interesting certainly that you described the rain as a she, ann but it's a simple, thoughtful poem... nice one xx
Comment is about rainraingoaway (blog)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Phew - talk about a chain reaction from poem to poem, Isobel.. Like this however although it is very sad... When I get later in the week to think more myself - I reckon I'll be like this with tender, sad poems. November does this to me i think! xx
Comment is about Beloved (blog)
Original item by Isobel
Thanks for your comment on my poem - your comment did in fact sum up how I was feeling and I never regretted my choice of words. x
Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)
Original item by Elaine
Come back and be inspired for yourself :) xx
Comment is about Beloved (blog)
Original item by Isobel
<Deleted User> (7164)
Mon 8th Nov 2010 23:31
A tender, sensitive and thought-provoking poem, Izz, with some lovely phrases.
P.S. Yes (to answer the question)
P.P.S. Thanks for the pointer to Wilfrid Owen's poem in the Remembrance Day discussion. Maybe that was on your mind too.
http://www.writeoutloud.net/public/newsgroupview.php?NewsThreadsID=1115&NewsGroupsID=30
Comment is about Beloved (blog)
Original item by Isobel
This poem was inspired by Shoeless's poem l'inconnue which was inspired by my poem Epitaph, which was inspired by Banksy's poem Epitaph. Don't you just love this site?
Comment is about Beloved (blog)
Original item by Isobel
This is a beautiful piece of writing, Freda. I particularly liked "sea-sucked road" and "rags of moonlight". Very appropriate on a leaves-on-the-line night like this
Comment is about Tide Turn (blog)
Original item by Freda Davis
Thanks for your comment on Currawong, Barrie. I enjoyed your Betjemanesque In Passing very much.
Comment is about Barrie Singleton (poet profile)
Original item by Barrie Singleton
Wow, I really enjoyed this, Ann, good poem. xx
(Thanks for comment on my profile, will have to post something tomorrow when I'm awake!)
Comment is about rainraingoaway (blog)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Some stunning images, Cynthia. The use of "mince" and "ham" is interesting - emphasises the fleshiness, the raw physicality of sexuality. Echoes the edge of violence and sensuality which is certainly to be found in Picasso's work. Good not to have the image up - I sometimes think that images posted with poems can get in the way of the reader's own response.
Comment is about Lines on Picasso's APERITIF (blog)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Really enjoyed this. Gave me a shock of recognition as it reminds me to a poem I wrote years ago, using some of the exact same words! But it was not at all as well conceived and realised as your poem.
Comment is about the little leaf (blog)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Hi Elaine, thanks for your comment on Ghazal, that was exactly what I was trying to do! so great, thx. win xx
Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)
Original item by Elaine
This is spot on for the time of year - without talking directly about the end of the year, witches and so on. Much more subtle and evocative.
Comment is about Must be the season of the witch (blog)
Original item by Shoeless Carole
Only just read this, Dave. I love it, so amusing and well written. x
Comment is about Mannequin (blog)
Original item by Dave Carr
Liked the title as a play on "The Persistence of Memory". I especially enjoyed the first verse. This seems to have a life of it's own,possibly seperate from the rest, but then the key to the whole piece is perhaps "fracturing.." since this is the surrealist experience?
Comment is about The Persistent Memoir (blog)
Original item by Marianne Daniels
Enjoyed this - some good rhythms in it. I think as a performance piece you need the last line.
Comment is about Black Dog (blog)
Original item by Dave Bradley
Absolutley great. Very much enjoyed reading and re-reading this. I must say, here speaks a man of experience - you sure know your M&S!!
Comment is about Mannequin (blog)
Original item by Dave Carr
<Deleted User> (7212)
Mon 8th Nov 2010 21:25
loveitloveitloveit !
the title hints at something lesser, but for me, this is one of your very best. Lovely. xx
Comment is about rainraingoaway (blog)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Kenny, this is great. So glad you posted it. Verse 2 - very powerful. Possibly "The Affliction"? Referencing George Herbert's poem of the same name? Hope to see you soon. x
Comment is about The Afflicted (blog)
Original item by Steven Kenny
Really enjoyed your poem - very evocative. Particularly liked line 6. Do agree with Cynthia though about the use of afar.
Comment is about Autumn Fen (blog)
Original item by Christopher Dawson
Actually I didn't mind the "life sucks" as it seems to express what you felt - I can see you there, sort of huddled over your pint, thinking of what might have been with the two worlds that presumably didn't ever collide. Had a similar moment myself this year so this struck a chord with me.
Comment is about The Original Oak (blog)
Original item by Isobel
Nice poem! But... I would like to know: How do you distinguish "he" or "she"? I would better say that rain is "he". Do you know why? Because according to the Russian language the word "rain" ends with a consonant.
Comment is about rainraingoaway (blog)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Very sobering poem but liked it a lot.
Comment is about L'Inconnue (blog)
Original item by Shoeless Carole
Brill. Loved it. Packs a real punch.
Comment is about Anniversary Haiku (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
joyful memories
Comment is about Jake (This poem was written for a very dear friend on the loss of her true and faithful friend) (blog)
Original item by Gus Jonsson
no , thankyou Winston :) x
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
hello , thanks for reading and commenting on my poem.
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
I think this is a big golden poem Gus! And I agree with Francine. xx
Comment is about Jake (This poem was written for a very dear friend on the loss of her true and faithful friend) (blog)
Original item by Gus Jonsson
Imagine you winning! Were all the guys jealous? They all came nowhere, man. Ok, I'll stop now ...
Comment is about Rachel McGladdery (poet profile)
Original item by Rachel McGladdery
Cheers for your comment on Currawong, Win
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Cheers for your comments on Currawong, David. What a stroke of luck, to win a holiday to Australia. You've chosen a better time to go than we did, weather-wise, but my wife's is a primary school head, so we have no choice on dates: August or August.
Comment is about David Cooke (poet profile)
Original item by David Cooke
Such a lovely celestial tribute, Gus...
xxx
Comment is about Jake (This poem was written for a very dear friend on the loss of her true and faithful friend) (blog)
Original item by Gus Jonsson
Congratulations Paul, and to Ann and Chris - nice one.
And a big thank you to Andy for running it :) cheers :)
I'm looking forward to the next one - it's fun writing on a shared theme
Comment is about Freedom Competition Winners (blog)
Original item by Andy N
Ambiguous yes but not unfathomable.
I like the new style of writing you are experimenting with Janet. x
Comment is about Ambiguity (blog)
<Deleted User> (7164)
Mon 8th Nov 2010 12:59
Oh my god! It's mi' Aunty Mary :-)
Always wondered where she'd got to.x
Comment is about L'Inconnue (blog)
Original item by Shoeless Carole
Thanks for commenting on me poem. Send me a postal order for £500k and I'll send you details of Sinful-X, the thigh people.
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Hi Cynthia - thank you for your very kind comments on Salsa with Orion. On a different subject, have you read Elizabeth Bishop? I am just discovering her poetry and I love a great deal of it. xx
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
<Deleted User> (6895)
Mon 8th Nov 2010 09:42
Good morning (again)Ann-yes it was a bit gooney to have cossack danced-the threads could have burst and all me 'aggis would have popped out! enjoy your London trip-watch out(or should I say breathe in on train_warm farts are likely to abound!)give my regards to old broadway-and take these with you-xxxxxxxSteffo-ps what a flippin deluge in the Rhondda last night-so I phoned the boatyard and asked them to take the car in part ex-for a peddle-o/paddle-o!
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
little bit of the buddhism in that for me, Cythnia.. love the last line in particular but top stuff! x
Comment is about Creation (blog)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
love pieces like this where a good story is told within a piece, but not everything is told! Well done on reaching 2nd place too in the comp! x
Comment is about salsa with orion (blog)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
mid-week I hope to sort out my last note on the comp (ended up been away for the week-end) but I just want to add, it was a pleasure organising the comp and I had so much praise, it almost makes me feel big-headed - lol.
For the next competition, I have been speaking to Paul - more details to follow!
Comment is about Freedom Competition Winners (blog)
Original item by Andy N
Steven Kenny
Tue 9th Nov 2010 11:09
Thanks for your comment Laura, you're right about the typo :-) Fixed it!
Comment is about Castaway (blog)
Original item by Steven Kenny