The past is haunting:
scars, seeping wounds.
The present is daunting:
deadly viruses, illness, disease,
affecting everything - livelihood,
The future is uncertain:
We ask why:
gleaning truth from ...
Sunday 27th December 2020 7:38 pm
It takes me back to a boy;
the falling of snow
To a fluffy, white street
under a streetlight's dull glow:
Where an old man trudges through
Each foot now a plough
Eyes squinting to see
The here and the now
I watch from a window
My youthful eyes wide
Thinking: move to the road
Then you can slide!
But he carries on trudging
As I shake my youn...
Monday 21st December 2020 4:19 pm
raining cats and dogs outside
Ron's too heavy, nearly fainting
ceiling's cracked and peeling
needs plastering and painting
never enjoyed sex, orgasms
gave me not a second look
up there that web of cracks
is not unlike reading a book
he's pumping like a good 'un
I nearly dropped off to sleep
surveying spidery fissures
a bit like counting sheep
Friday 18th December 2020 10:39 am
I wish I never had to sleep
A vigil I would gladly keep
About your bed.
I'd watch you breathing out and in
Your eyelids gently fluttering
As if you dreamt.
You will not always be so close
That I can watch you in repose
Life takes such speed.
And now it is I most regret
The frailty that makes us forget
Moments like these.
Sunday 13th December 2020 10:30 am
Have You Noticed?
after Mary Oliver
have you noticed how certain poems linger
in the echoes of yesterday
how certain triggers replay
a certain phrase
how hanging onto words
engulfs an empty room
how walking through fields
begets velvet moonlit nights listening to you
how spinning a record after dropping a needle
births a mountain of longing and sorrow
have you ever noticed...
Monday 7th December 2020 4:21 am
he says as it relates
to a date
of another first
It reminds me of things
I shouldn’t hold onto.
It shouldn’t matter
when I first noticed
the way light hits his beard,
or how his colors blend
as in a Monet,
only that I see them.
It shouldn’t matter
when those butterflies first flew
from our insides;
only that they fly every time.
It shouldn’t matter
Saturday 28th November 2020 12:21 am
Your smile, your laughter was the light during the nighttime
Your touch, The way your fingers would caress my soul
Your voice , like soft melodies playing in my mind
Your time, if you had to say, it was well spent
Your life, was a gift; a small brown box draped in red ribbon
our memories are embedded in my heart
I can feel it as if it were now.
In memory of Chris...
Wednesday 11th November 2020 1:58 pm
in the blaze of the summer heat, drips
of sweat rippled down our smooth skin backs.
we set out for adventure along the Pacific coast,
the four of us squeezed in a compact sedan.
sisters laughing, shouting, nowhere else to be.
engaging winding hair-pin turns, honking,
speeding, and slamming on the brakes
as the afternoon sun scorched the town.
we reveled ...
Tuesday 3rd November 2020 5:42 pm
Particles of dust swirl in the lamplight
Distant footfalls echo, muted by time,
Artifice alone is giver of sight,
Moments marked only by resonant chime.
Shelves stand bulging with catalogued memory,
Recent or stored for employment’s intent.
Lost, sacrificed to time transitory,
Older sheaves left sprawling; their shelf life spent.
Dusty cracked piles of sepia and g...
Monday 2nd November 2020 11:51 am
“There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.” ~ Leonard Cohen
Halloween frightens my inner child
who is afraid of masked men,
being alone in the dark,
daggers to the heart,
a body aging too soon,
but the hollow night
gives way to a full moon rising
and a million stars to wish upon,
ushered by angels beaming light
Sunday 1st November 2020 1:38 am
As autumn's rusty fingers begin
to push their way through tired trees
So, the early dimming light
and spectral chill conspire
to gently sweep me back in time
It's Oxford in the autumn
nineteen; with eyes opening
A new life unfolding
cycling through the leaves
and sighing under bridges
Oxford in the autumn
that brick so old around me
broad streets, illogical lanes
busses and puddle...
Friday 30th October 2020 2:29 pm
My eagle eye sweeps
The room nursing maimed dreams
And stifled memories
Which make walls bleed
When drubbed by the hollow breeze.
Who am I except a mute bystander?
Unfazed by the detritus,
My steady gaze punctures
The flesh of aged and nascent delusions.
Stay, stay with me,
Before I leave,
And catch a train
To a place where summer rains
Submerge mundane lands
And bleached s...
Sunday 11th October 2020 2:07 pm
All that's left is wreckage
Debris from what's over
The time when I loved
No more the idle rover
Ashes are better than nothing
Half a loaf better than crumbs
Yet memories burn painfully
What's forfeited still numbs
Years that went quickly
Days that ran into sand
Left poignant memories
Your soft yielding hand
That May day at the beach
Thursday 8th October 2020 10:58 am
The sweetest memories hang
in the dark room of my mind
I develop them occasionally
more exciting times
Yellows and browns begin to wash
across the leaves outside my window
I haven’t seen you in the flesh
since those shoots were new
it feels so long ago
We ran through those streets
as if we owned them
spinning endlessly from bar to bar
from joke to ...
Thursday 1st October 2020 5:06 pm
As I stepped into adolescence
I used to spend hours, daydreaming,
the perfect love, the perfect life
walks among raindrops
slow stepped waltz
piggyback rides and, winks caught off guard.
Then, life happened.
the zest for life, escaped from the windows of the mind
the daydreams, stayed dreams
belief in love simply vanished
Then you came along
with careless sweet talks
toothy grins ...
Wednesday 2nd September 2020 9:44 am
I'm reposting this poem with the audio I recorded of it (as a song) to commemorate my father and the other soldiers who fought during WW2 in Asia - The Forgotten Army of Burma - for the 75th Anniversary of VJ Day
The Bayonet In The Shed
He put it there in forty nine,
in a woodworm riddled drawer,
wrapped it in a greasy rag.
A remnant from the war.
On top of it he laid h...
Friday 14th August 2020 4:14 pm
It presents gravels before my feet,
When it meets the sand,
Holding my longing gaze as I stand
Atop coffined treasures
And pebbles filled with flints made from memories,
That weigh my slippers
Down to this deserted beach.
Myriad secrets encaged in their bottle shaped ampoules
Float aimlessly like vagabonds do.
Imprisoned in cells of reminiscence,
They await their acquittal somet...
Wednesday 12th August 2020 7:32 pm
i started to question the connection
& couldn’t breathe
images mix up in a daydream
that replay constantly
sometimes a new image appears
did someone change the videotape?
these images and connections aren’t only in my head
but i fear this is only gravy,
a topping or an extra side
or just a dessert you fancy
it must be deeper
Sunday 2nd August 2020 4:45 am
distant memories of
what we no longer are
as our former lives are out the door
how do we move on
and build a passage to tomorrow
when i look up to the skies
and only have the stars
to remind me
the best moments
are our yesterdays
Wednesday 22nd July 2020 4:29 pm
This space is like a ghost town
Trestle tables row on row
Echoing with the hustle bustle
Vendors cries of long ago
I held my mother’s hand
And listened to them shout
‘apples sixpence a pound
Come on get your money out!’
Comics stored in cardboard boxes
Toys stacked high on stands
Gleaming in the Friday sun
Just out of reach of sticky h...
Monday 6th July 2020 12:50 pm
Needles & Thread
I remember her sat at an old Singer sewing machine
Turning the handle in the half-light of autumn
Making dresses and skirts for herself
So that precious pennies could be invested in children
She made me a Lone Ranger mask
From remnants of black cloth
She had left from one of her creations
I wore it with pride and a whoop and a holler
Friday 3rd July 2020 1:59 pm
The shape of our love, our version of it,
Exists in bubbling thoughts of former lives
And constant dreams of distant hearts
Where our lives are entwined
Ripples of waves intersect
Jetting dangerously close
But never on the same path
Turning heads, looking back
How do we get off this track
Without losing control,
Where it will go
The inhabitants look upon us
Saturday 20th June 2020 8:56 pm
Only dew drops now remain
atop blades from the torrential rain.
The lightning strikes
lessen in succession.
But the dew remembers
from where it came.
Friday 19th June 2020 2:30 pm
The production commenced
with actors on stage
portraying the love we once had-
the grasp of her cheek,
the look in her eyes,
as he folded over himself
to make her swoon his way.
Amongst an empty crowd,
the curtain’s now drawn,
the actors have gone home,
the final act is done,
it’s time to get on.
Hanging on for an encore,
hoping for another show,
relishing in the memori...
Friday 19th June 2020 1:36 am
Images and words
words longed for
as they wrap around
and envelop me,
overwhelming yet satisfying.
Since our last meeting
your ghostly presence arrived
in the oddest of places:
long car drives,
walking in a park,
every room of the house,
and late at night in bed.
Friday 12th June 2020 3:17 pm
My house is so full of empty spaces
where you used to eat, sleep and be
My days are now full of silence
because you are not here with me
My thoughts are full of worry
was it too soon to say goodbye
My eyes are still full of tears
I hope you didn't see me cry
My body is full of loneliness
you were my companion to the end
My memory is full of good times
Thursday 14th May 2020 1:48 pm
I wonder what happens
To the poorly drawn images
We keep abreast as children,
Sheltered inside our notebooks and their crinkly pages.
I envisage those pages accompanying
Balloons, bubbles and butterflies,
And the colors in them adorning
The sallow face of the sky.
I like to believe that my poorly chalked out blades of grass
Somehow appended the greenery on earth
Thursday 7th May 2020 8:47 pm
He orders black coffee,
soup and salad,
steak and potatoes
before his apple pie dessert
at buffets on the other side of town
A routine meal
that would years later
as his reward
Dad loves on his Alaskan crab legs
with a side of melted butter
While Mom orders chicken
at a seafood restaurant
She doesn’t offer to pay
while Auntie tells ...
Thursday 7th May 2020 7:17 pm
Life is simple, yet complicated by seemingly insignificant moments that make all the difference in the end.
It is the unfiltered thoughts that escaped from our mouths in our weakest moments
It is the words that ruined relationships because we were too stubborn to apologise
It is the time that has passed between friendships in which too much has happened to reconnect
It is the memo...
Thursday 30th April 2020 12:50 pm
I died yesterday
With a pen in one hand and a diary in the other.
The latter's pages were inlaid
With prints of my curry stained fingers,
And splotches of tea,
And smudges of ink,
And spools of memories,
And streams of ridiculous cravings.
I fashioned the contents with the loose threads
I'd been stockpiling since forever.
Vibrant, prismatic, but half-completed...
Friday 24th April 2020 5:59 pm
The Small Things
A pinecone from a Bavarian forest
A small rock from a glacier in Alberta
A round pebble from a Jamaican beach
A strip of bark from a tree in Wakefield
These are the places touched
The places that have touched
A love letter from a pretty girl
A toy bat-mobile from a friend now lost
A medal given to you by your father
A charm bracelet wor...
Sunday 19th April 2020 2:41 pm
The Dancing Light Of Candles
Flickering shadows cast upon the night
Phantoms leaping on oak panelled walls
Where the final breath of evening gently falls
The white and orange glow of candlelight
Will soothe the nervous child and ease his fright
Or so your aged memory recalls
There is no more a sweet magical sight
Than darkness where a defeated demon ...
Saturday 18th April 2020 3:38 pm
Nineteen nighty five
I was sitting in the sports hall
pen in hand
the desks apart
a teacher I didn’t know
patrolled the aisles
The English paper said ‘write a story
include a river
and an allegory’
The clock at the front clicks
thin hands jerk and tick
I spin my pen
study the air vents above me
there’s a dusty shuttlecock
caught up in the pipework
there’s a br...
Thursday 16th April 2020 2:02 pm
Memories are a funny thing
They can make you laugh but also cry
They are the basis of reliving the past
And for some, staying there
They hold secrets encapsulated in time
They hold feelings hidden from the world
A special place that one can visit as they wish
To hear voices and see smiles
To feel joy and love of those past
Memories, they hold the power to prope...
Monday 13th April 2020 12:31 pm
this world is a universe
for she is a world
at every turn beautiful;
a billion flowers
in any garden of gloom
would bloom to her smile;
her existence is life
her instance pride
with sadness shied away
the swooned heart
travels miles in a beat;
every sweet smell
reminds me of her
the earthy perfume
rain sends forth
the flavored whiff...
Friday 10th April 2020 12:58 pm
the fragrance of flowers
by the cemetery breeze
celebrate the silence
of life being released
the colors of nature
that piece of earth
cradling every moment
of time since birth
dark figures fade out
replaying in their heads
as the day ends, yet again
death is fed
Monday 6th April 2020 1:03 pm
I lately watched your video, a Palm Sunday morning show of you and your wife.
Me, your mistress, now ashes of passionate fires, forbidden fires.
Intention of sin in your ideology.
And then this scene of an innoscent couple, the ones who try to pretent what they aren't.
Monday 6th April 2020 12:45 am
Those shadows the epitome of time
let me bruise them so they cannot move,
make those pale moments clearer
in the light of the hurt-
a life no longer drenched
in shapes eclipsing the stopwatch,
now I can pause time when I want to
escaping the minutes for hours,
see the clouds in still shift,
alluding to an illusion
of some fading minute,
the hands of the clock skim ...
Sunday 5th April 2020 10:49 am
It's good when your mind is Active . It gets you through life . Letting you create and survive . Survive most problems . And helps you see through . Feelings or worry's you have . Just helps you get through .The lonely days .The long days . The Remembering . The lonely and also the happy days . Memories for you to Remember .
Tuesday 31st March 2020 4:06 am
Ah, the magic of night
when obligations are over,
another adulting day in the books.
I rest my weary body,
set my boggled mind free
with a little poetry...
Your words await
like a teen with a corsage
to take me to the prom,
where we twist and twirl
under twinkling dollar store stars
and a paper moon.
Happy memories pop up
Saturday 21st March 2020 2:55 am
Those dulcet shadows
chased my figure,
dancing. a motif,
to end of those pages,
a requiem of endless sobriety
to those euphoric seconds
lost to me.
Tuesday 10th March 2020 8:18 pm
Walking down Lovers Lane on that cool October evening
We stopped and lingered there
Stood only inches apart
There wasn’t anything more to say
I wasn’t one for small talk anyway
We both knew what we wanted
I asked that fateful question,
‘What are you waiting for?’
You kissed me
All I can remember is that time stood still
I lost my breath
I lost feeling in my legs
I crashed to the gro...
Thursday 27th February 2020 3:58 am
When sun comes against all odds
And the colours of life just pop
Or when the rain falls
It falls and falls
And you wet your lips
With piping hot tea
With warm biscuit
Savour the crumbs
Cosy and safe
In the arms of a jumper
The padding of the sofa,
Like a huge hug
Or when your face aches,
Your stomach vibrates
Because you are fighting to breathe
Tuesday 18th February 2020 5:52 am
One by one counting memories:
an old photograph of us at the beach,
a sweater that won’t rid itself of your scent,
books and CDs that you lent,
I’ve packed them away
They won’t see another day
I’ve packed the boxes,
made the plans,
the rooms are empty
but I am motionless
Is it that familiar look?
Is it the morning glow
that paints itself through the window?
No, it’s the memories ...
Monday 3rd February 2020 6:32 pm