before doing a runner

she cut down my tree

pine needles all over

festive debris to see

fairy dead on the rug

each bauble smashed

lights cables tangled

my Christmas dashed

should have twigged it,

axe-heads lit her eyes

our rapport splintering

ate my last mince pies

a forest of complaints

calling me dead wood

unhappy with my log

called my p...

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I blame myself, for its all my own fault

Should have been honest from the start

It began that night after American Gigolo

When I said he was prodding my heart

Since then his pud's gone to his head

He's convinced he's Warren Beatty

I could do with a lover of substance

A stud fit and well-hung and meaty

By now I've got used to pretending

I deserve at the very lea...

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