Hi Andy,
Thanks for reading and commenting on 'Empty Space' - always appreciate your input.
Cx

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

Oh this is excellent Dave! I LOVE the questions asked, the massive amount of information contained within, and the nicely located entrance of a more theological slant. I really like this:

How dull. I pass through you

with my mind, but more would be fun, would be

‘positive’

Your disclaimer about the pic made me laugh too :D

Comment is about Inner Space (blog)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Reading it I pause for breath at drapes and kill.

Comment is about venomous (blog)

Heh - good one, little witch :)

Another vote for the present tense version

Comment is about Shoeless (blog)

Original item by Shoeless Carole

Hi again :)

Ha, yes indeedy, sweet catharsis! It's a fine fine feeling to be able to make something good out of something so bad.

I like your interpretation of the bike title...and it can also be seen as bike = cycle ;)

Thank you again for taking the time to read and comment Elaine. Would be good to meet you some time :)

Laura x

Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)

Original item by Elaine

Thank you so much for all the lovely comments Elaine. Hope to meet you at Hebden Bridge next time! xx

Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)

Original item by Elaine

Thank you again, Anne. It is a funny little poem, born on a depressed morning. Not brilliant.
I find your poems like water colours, picturing detail and conveying a mood. Each one well worth reading.

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Agreed, it is beautifully read. I would love to be able to read the words on the page too if you could see your way to posting them?
Please.x

Comment is about space (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Thanks for your comments Elaine.I like your first profile poem. You convey very well the morning mix of practicality and mental exertion required to get out in the morning. 'Cold water...cleans away night's fears.' I really identified with this.

Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)

Original item by Elaine

I'd have to hear you read it. If you read it with punctuation then I guess it should be added.

Comment is about venomous (blog)

Thanks all. Now you what it feels like to be me, Janet.
Punctuation would encourage more readers. Discuss.You're probably right,James, it's rare that I don't punctuate but it felt right here.

Comment is about venomous (blog)

Hi Ann
You read beautifully. Lovely voice, if I might be so bold.
Very 2001.
These are merely suggestions. Up to you.
I think this would be even better with some editing to get it down to its bare bones, reflecting the spatial sparseness.
suggest you cut the duplications/redundancies [brackets]:

It’s cold up here [in space]
Having just heard you read the title, we know where you are already

Once it was home
[Not any more]
We know the second line from the “once it was…”

Try removing the –ly adverbs and see how it sounds then.

Brilliantly read and a lovely piece.
hope you dont mind these suggestions?

Comment is about space (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Beautifully read Ann.

Comment is about space (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Hello Elaine,
Thank you for taking the time to comment on "Pals".

Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)

Original item by Elaine

I like the thoughfulness and ideas of this poem, referencing Elliot and Coleridge too - nice one.

Comment is about Inner Space (blog)

Original item by Dave Bradley

I see what you mean. it is a huge cliches but I feel that each couplet in that is a cliches maybe. When I first wrote that poem I played about with the punctuation but it didn't seem to work in practice. On the page people seemed confused and when I read it out I left a full stop beat.

thanks for your feedback :)

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

I liked the enigmatic feel of this poem.

Comment is about three signs (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

And how sorry I was not to be there with you all! Ah, well, next time I hope. Thanks for the poem - it is a little piece of that adventure for us to share with you.

Comment is about coda - hebden bridge (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Elaine - how could I possibly mind you saying that - you are too kind! xx

Comment is about the man from rejerrah (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Enjoyed this piece a lot. Like all of your poems, if you don't mind me saying, there is a lovely soul behind it.

Comment is about the man from rejerrah (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Thanks. I was really annoyed I had to leave early on the Tudor night. Oh well, i've got a sabbatical coming up from January to April so I should be able to come down to a few more events. Any you can suggest.

Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)

Original item by Elaine

Perfectly lovely poem. I also could see this as a piece for children although I enjoyed it too.

Comment is about rainraingoaway (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

"Their love echoes round the oceans" and "and together
they fall into that heavy nothingness" are wonderful lines. A very touching poem.

Comment is about whale music (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Verses 3 to 6 seem to me very strong. But "we are all grown ups" linked to the reference to the woman killed rescuing her dog seems a strong link binding a theme of the poem. Like Ray I don't think you have to have the last 2 lines but you know best what effect you are aiming at so maybe we are just plain wrong!

Comment is about coach E (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

I remember sometime around 1970 being asked at school to write a story about what it would be like to be the size of an electron...and some girl in the class got a 'merit', 10 out of ten for a complete load of crap about being able to see people as giants and chairs seeming huge...and I'd written about being in a black void where nothing was visible in any direction and how matter was indivisible from time and space...and I got 3 out of ten for just turning up.

It literally changed my life...I gave up on any teacher actually being able to say anything sensible to me for years..it turned me against the system....because that teacher was just so stupid! (and she didn't like my essay).

Sad innit?

: (

Jxxx

Comment is about Inner Space (blog)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Isobel - spot on! Many thanks for your thoughful and bang on comments on "Post Past"!

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Your poem reminds me of how I never could get to grips with anything scientific.

I like the thoughtfulness of this though Dave and the very positive note you end on. x

Comment is about Inner Space (blog)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Hey Ann

Thanks for the lovely comment on Mcdonalds Sky. Anything you reckon I could do better on it.

James :)

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Thanks all. It was a bit of a scribble that I put directly up as a blog, so the story telling bits might not sit happily with the "poetic" bits. But it was an interesting journey. Public transport is very conducive to poems!

Comment is about coach E (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Re: your comments on my comments (!) on your poem "Beloved" - I feel the same. Love for a child is something else altogether.

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Thank you for your comment on my "Post Past". I must take some time to look at your recent work. I looked at my settings, never having done so before, and saw that, by accident, you were on some kind of excluded list! So sorry - it means I haven't been able to see your recent poems on the blog. I shall rectify that tonight.

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Oooh! I like both!

Comment is about Shoeless (blog)

Original item by Shoeless Carole

Continuing to enjoy your poems, Laura. No, I've not written about my "nod of recognition" yet but I am sure it will come along one day - ah, sweet catharsis! x

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

I really love the first four lines. The beginning of the next verse loses momentum for me, but the end comes back strong. Good one!

Comment is about Lazy Sun (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Thanks Elaine.

Comment is about A gardener reminisces. (blog)

Original item by Tim Ellis

Very clever selection of words to convey a lot in a little! Who wants to be a purist - if it works, that's all that matters.

Comment is about Space Beat Haiku (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Yet I guess the point is we use phrases that are sometimes a bit well worn because they work. This poem felt comforting, familiar but yet not completely so because it has your voice, Freda.

Comment is about I cross a moor where stars are white. (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Enjoyed this poem, Tim. The wrap of the lines hides, like the "sheen of frost", the tight structure!

Comment is about A gardener reminisces. (blog)

Original item by Tim Ellis

Really enjoyed the ideas you are exploring here.

Comment is about The Written Word (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Absolutley agree with steve here. Spot on. Would love to hear this poem performed. Very powerful.

Comment is about No Call for It (blog)

Original item by Steven Waling

Of all poems concerning war and rememberance so far on the site this month, I find this to be the best, to my taste. It conveys something of what it must have felt like rather than generic-sounding phrases that can be written when looking at war from a distance of time. Very difficult not to be hackneyed when writing on this topic - it has been truly done to death but you have brought some freshness to it here.

Comment is about What am I Knitting? (blog)

That's what is so wonderful about poetry I think and good poetry in particular - it allows the audience to engage in dialogue with the piece, bringing into play their own interpretations. I too love such descriptive poems on nature. Thanks, Janet.

Comment is about Life (blog)

Very beautiful poem. I read it last week when you posted it but have enjoyed reading it again since then. I appreciate that you share your work here. Thanks.

Comment is about Tide Turn (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Yeah, I saw it as part of my English Literature degree.

Any thoughts on my poem's meaning?

Comment is about Fourth Wall of Faustus (blog)

Original item by Ushiku Crisafulli

I'm glad you made the connection of hydrate with tears - that is what I wanted to communicate - the idea that your tears could be used to bring someone back to life - it isn't overkill for me - I like to express myself passionately.
I think deep down I probably was thinking about the love of a mother for a child. I have never loved a partner with this depth - though as I said before, I know such love does exist - I've witnessed it.
Thanks for taking the time to comment and to think deeply about the words - I really appreciate it.
Isobel x

Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)

Original item by Elaine

I enjoy your poems so much. Not so much the Ps (or Qs) as such wonderful alliteration!

Comment is about Antique Zealot (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

I liked this a lot and, like Cynthia, will re-read it for further enjoyment!

Comment is about WHAT GUIDES THE SPIDER (blog)

Love it. Fave line :"gravity for idiots".

Question the lack of punctuation though. I see that as too much of a blur of words. Punctuation would encourage more readers.

Comment is about venomous (blog)

Funny how poems conjure up different interpretations - I thought of it as mother and child. As you say, it's the wonderful flow of ideas on this site. I am remembering the last one of yours I read - the "Old Oak"! I agree there is nothing wrong with odd and even what at times appear ugly words ("Life sucks")but I wonder is it that in chosing hydrate that it is overly employing the image of tears. Is that why it hasn't struck right for some? Loved this line: "immortalise for me the very bones of you". Really deeply felt poem.

Comment is about Beloved (blog)

Original item by Isobel

must admit not a fan of archeic language use. Did you see the recent production at The Exchange?

Comment is about Fourth Wall of Faustus (blog)

Original item by Ushiku Crisafulli