Thanks Ieuan and Darren.
Darren, I agree and I'm frustrated because I know that with the right tutoring I could create finished pieces.

Comment is about the beggar man (blog)

Hi Pete - I enjoy your imagery and your articulated perceptions of this world. There is always much to look at in your work. Multi-layered with a complexity that befits a man of your logic and obvious flare for writing as well as performance. From a linguists perspective, some verbs are not consistent with particles and tense but I can imagine you performing this, where it's not as much of an issue as it is on t'page.

Comment is about the beggar man (blog)

Hahahaha - really loved this Antoniotoniotoniotnotnotnio - the glass eye again! I noticed "Darling" had shave his eye brows the other week, you could see the stubble... .Very amusing indeed, thank you....

Comment is about Downing Street pillow talk (blog)

Wonderful backlash against consumerism. Loved the "intimate" first person perspective and enquiry. Diolch!

Comment is about the beggar man (blog)

I like how this begins with the 'coldness' of short clauses and then animates itself with feeling through the longer intimate sentence at the end.

Comment is about Love Song (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Emily - you have an unimaginable imagination.
Oven gloves make great pets too.

Comment is about Egg Face (blog)

Hi Melissa - if I was to study your poetry at any advanced level, I would not fail to notice that you write about themes that are set deep inside a person's psyche. One way to articulate these emotions is to write about them, which you usually do with a raw emotion that is almost tangible.
I know you say this is an 'old one' and after I got over the lumps of the words ' awakening yesterdays' I fell into the poem's rhythm. I don't think those words are phonetically suitable because they have too many syllables to suit the iambic metre that runs throughout the rest of this poem. There must be synonyms of suitable words?

Comment is about Tether (blog)

Hello Jeff,

Thank you for your comments on my poem. Like you I'm relatively new to writing, and I'm exploring new avenues all the time.

I did think that the ZXombie poem was rather short, so thank you for confirming this for me.

I live and work in Japan and like more and more countries around the world, people are just sooo busy and can't see the wood for the trees, this is what my poem is about, if you hadn't guessed already.

I really like your poems, keep up the good work.

Belinda x

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Hi Melissa,
I enjoyed this one, and it reads so well! I understand the feelings too, reminds me of the man I was married to for 12 years or so. take care xx clarissa

Comment is about Tether (blog)

"If I was" a fabulous 'list' of desires and desiring...hope you were thrilled fulfilled!

Loved it,
Moira

Comment is about Clare Kirwan (poet profile)

Original item by Clare Kirwan

Thanks once again Jeff and pleased you liked the predestiny of it all!

Moira

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Thanks for the quick response Moira and Antonionioni. Its very friendly of you.

Comment is about Love Song (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Love this Freda, your exploration of our sense of separation even paradoxically in 'intimacy.' Very touching connection drawn out in beginnings residing in affectionate glances.

Lovely,

Moira

Comment is about Love Song (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Angst, well explored and thankfully recovered. Glad it made an apperance here. I particularly enjoyed "You shut the blinds Awakening yestersay's demise"

Re-discover away!

Moira

Comment is about Tether (blog)

Hello Jeff,

You are not a pedant..you are RIGHT...error and too late to amend! Bore indeed...where would we be without feedback, poorer for it. Thanks.

Happy penning Jeff

Comment is about Deviation (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Melissa,

Great sharing, thanks! Pleased the emotion hit home and that you enjoyed the flow. It was a moment when I felt it needed to be said. The relief!
What a wonderful community here me thinks!

Take care,
Moira

Comment is about Deviation (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Hi Moira, like this as well, just one thing, is it boar or bore? Could have a major impact on the content, sorry to be pedantic!

Comment is about Deviation (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Hi Belinda, I like this and its a good idea, but for me it ended just when it was getting going, maybe add a couple of stanzas with other Zombie thoughts? good stuff Jeff

Comment is about Zombies (blog)

Original item by Belinda

Hi Moira, really enjoyed this (enjoyed others too, but just catching up with last two weeks blogs! - this is my favourite), love the analogy of the sat nav and dumping it cos everthing ,apped out, nice one Jeff

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Mmmmmm sounds familiar Pete, great write, cheers Jeff

Comment is about a shadow of his former self (blog)

Wonderful Melissa, really got something out of this, need to read it again!! Jeffarama!

Comment is about A Light Ahead (blog)

There is such a sense of emotion pouring out of this piece, and I love the flow of your words. :)

Comment is about Deviation (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Dear Moira,

Thank you for your comment on my poem, A Light Ahead.

It is indeed a gift to dream and within the dream, a gift to write, and no matter what, we need to keep that dream alight.

I hope that you will do the same. :)

Take care. :)

-Melissa

Comment is about Moira Eribenne (poet profile)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Hey, Jeff. I hope you are having a great weekend, and keep writing your poetry. I really like your poems.

As for what's happening here, nothing really except starting another retail job unfortunately.

Hope you're having a great weekend.

-Melissa

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

my kinda stuff, Daniel enjoyed it! Jeff

Comment is about lifes pendulmn (blog)

Original item by Daniel Hooks

Hi Alison, great to see you back in action, love this, my knida stuff, last stanza especially cuts deep, best wishes Jeff

Comment is about Expressions so Deep (blog)

Original item by Alison Mary Dunn

HI Gabriella,
This poem does seem to grab! It reminded me of 2 songs, one tittled ring my bell, and the ding dong song by gunther.When your in your fourties you may have a burnin desire, with pantys on fire. Haha good one, enjoyed the laugh thanks

Comment is about DING MY DONG !!!! (blog)

Pete!
Thanks for your comment and glad you enjoyed the title too! A world and a half Pete, and then some!

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Great poem, I especially like the title, it implies something else but as the poem unfolds we are shown a whole new world

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Hello Gabriella,

Domo Arigato for your comment on my poem :)) It's much appreciated. I only speak a little Japanese and have just started lessons, and I'm learning Hirgana.

Yes, I wrote this poem whilst sitting in a cafe in the city of Okayama last week. I'm mesmorized by people and how they go about their daily lives.

Thank you again x

Comment is about Belinda (poet profile)

Original item by Belinda

Thanks for the feedback Ieuan, fab celtic name!
Dizzying yes, dizzying as the entire experience of 'falling..'
I'm off to read you now and looking forward to it.

Be cool,
Moira

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

hya .. where r ur samples ?

gabby x

Comment is about Edward K Fisher (poet profile)

Original item by Edward K Fisher

I felt this was an excellent account of self examination, delusion AND discovery.

I like the economic use of words, makes it very pointy.

Comment is about UNCHAIN ME (blog)

RODNEY - TAKE THAT STICK OUT OF YOUR ARSE OLD MAN - OPEN YOUR EYES TO THE 21st CENTURY!?! as my friend says YOU ARE TRUELY '' a poetry purist'''

besitos x

Comment is about Upstairs, downstairs (blog)

I need to go and take a cold bath.

Now that is original and something [watching my words carefully here] I'd pay money to hear and see!

A great beat to it, thanks for sharing.

Comment is about DING MY DONG !!!! (blog)

Rodney - I enjoyed the above, very vivid - liked trees / angels / you.

Thanks for your comments on my poem too - I appreiciate honesty.

Comment is about Rodney Wood (poet profile)

Original item by Rodney Wood

yes yes MORIA [e] loving the fusion of both literature.. and simple language!

Comment is about Deviation (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

u remind me of billy connelly :) awwww x

Comment is about Seamus Kelly at Stubbing Wharf, Hebden Bridge September 2008 (photo)

I loved this, soaring poem (no pun intended) and some really cool metaphors. I felt a bit dizzy after reading it though :)

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Hi Zuzanna,

High praise indeed and many, many thanks. I am looking forward to immersing myself in some more of your magical and mysterious journeys into mythical wordscapes. You are a wonderfully vital part of this very special writing community.

very best,

Moira

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Hello, Pete

The poem does not resemble you from the past. It sounds like someone quite old and weary with his life experiences. Someone who might be depressed trying to smoke the cigarette to kill his time, thinking of those days gone by...You gave this poem life, it would sound wonderful if you presented in the open microphone. Quite entertaining listening to your voice sample. Thank you for the comment about my voice ...Smile.

Warm Regards,
Zuzanna

Comment is about a shadow of his former self (blog)

Hello Moira

Your poem is beautiful! The metaphoric lines are superb. It is mysterious and dreamy and at the same time excellent and creative wraps about DESTINY... Loved to read your write-Awesome!


Thank you,
Zuzanna

Comment is about Sack the sat nav (blog)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

Hello Pete,
" Hours " I " seem to waste."
That one line really jumped out at me from this poem.
Otherwise, it is excellent. The grey of a life intermingled with the use of the rubik cube colours of the people intermingled is a great metaphor.
I could almost smell the garage. And those sandwiches are pretty tasteless, i can tell you.
The flowers are colourful but never last long, in the fuel ozone.
I enjoyed your story-line. Thankyou.
Tara.

Comment is about a shadow of his former self (blog)

Hi Pete,
Love the "black dripping bats...encroaching tide"
I feel you strengthen the shadow metaphor with reference to the cold, steely, soulless, lost space of the 'deadened' motorway service station...shadowlands.

Enjoyed shadow of the former,,,,Good!

Moira

Comment is about a shadow of his former self (blog)

Hi Pete,

You already know, this is the kind of poetry i love to read from you.
This particular one tells a lovely story with some beautiful and some sadness.
The colours in the imagery are plentiful and vivid.
"Love it, darling." Janet.xx

Comment is about mistress of the flowers (blog)

HI Pete,
Interesting poem, made me think of an old man, my grandfather, you know the one, the drinker/heavy smoker/sick-o. Poor guy, put a shot gun in his hands and Id bet money it was him. I enjoyed the line about his lungs and bats, an excellent way to describe them. Gosh that Rhubicks cube can drive me mad. Anyway interesting poem.

Comment is about a shadow of his former self (blog)

HI Pete,
This one is very good. I remember this poem, altho, Ill say you have changed it a bit, and its even better then the first draft. Excelent poem!

Comment is about mistress of the flowers (blog)

Lauretta has asked me to read this, so a sound recording of it has been made.

Comment is about The ingredient’s for the disturbed (blog)

Zuzanna I Can 'hear' the accent in your voice. Where in europe are you descended from? To sound your origins as a fingerprint is the magic of our identity. Think the site is great and the community very enlivening and supportive.

There is a strong spiritual attunedness in your writing which I find transporting, lifting.

Delighted to chat with you,

Moira

Comment is about Moira Eribenne (poet profile)

Original item by Moira Eribenne