Thanks Steve.
For me the problem seems to lie in the fact that wherever in the world power shifts to - economically those people born in mud huts seem to have the same lot. And I think it will take a whole lot of change before their own governments start to prioritise welfare...
I'd agree that we all need to have that dream though and I love the way you have explored that common humanity in your poem.
Comment is about 369 000 (blog)
Original item by steve pottinger
<Deleted User> (9882)
Fri 26th Jul 2013 07:51
<Deleted User> (9882)
Fri 26th Jul 2013 07:48
Loved this too. An interesting piece.
Starfish
Comment is about The Template of my Being (blog)
Original item by Marksy
Fantastic. Loved reading this.
Starfish
Comment is about Offend a Daily Mail reader - today! (blog)
Original item by Marksy
This is powerful stuff.
Starfish
Comment is about Every Veterans Hair is Turning White (blog)
Original item by Noetic-fret!
Gets the thumbs up from me :p
Comment is about Eggy bread (blog)
Original item by Gareth Glyn Roberts
Some good Twaikus coming through, now. Just one thing - remember to follow HeatonsTwaiku, so you can see your own Tweeted works.
Comment is about Stockport WoL (group profile)
Original item by Stockport WoL
Some very nice Twaikus uploaded, Nigel... you are quickly getting used to the limits of the form.
Comment is about Stockport Write Out Loud to give arts trail a reet tweet (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Superb! Been waiting for some pertinent and meaningful comment on a certain birth and you've done it!
Comment is about 369 000 (blog)
Original item by steve pottinger
Hi Isobel!
I'm really pleased you enjoyed the poem, but I'm always really nervous about explaining what I've written. *deep breath* OK... the line 'who dream, as we do' is there - after the list of what their lives may hold for them - because we all, rich, poor, 1st & 3rd world, have dreams. Common humanity and all that.
The final two lines are intended to mean that the future, demographically, lies with the citizens and the cities of the developing world. Power and population are shifting away to new centres: China, Brazil, India etc. I suspect you may have taken that who to refer to the we in 'as we do'. It doesn't!
Hope that helps. :-)
Comment is about 369 000 (blog)
Original item by steve pottinger
Hiya, thanx for your comment on Purple Skies, hope you're enjoying WOL, like this poem by the way, best wishes Jeff
Comment is about Spring (blog)
Original item by Starfish
I read your comment before I read the poem and didn't imagine I'd like it as much as I did.
I love it though - it's wonderful poetry - strong, powerful and beautifully written.
I'm not sure I get the last two lines though. They seem to represent what you would like to happen rather than reality. Or does the 'we' refer to you and other protesters rather than those people born on mud floors?
Comment is about 369 000 (blog)
Original item by steve pottinger
<Deleted User> (5011)
Thu 25th Jul 2013 15:01
is that an anagram of <entail lager pot>? If so, is it code?
nice one Laura. Put it on Guardian's website.
Comment is about Regal Potential (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
I wrote this because amidst all the fuss over one baby, the other 369 000 born that day were being written out of history. Which is what always happens. I wanted to shift the perspective a little.
Thanks to Poetry 24 for publishing it today.
Comment is about 369 000 (blog)
Original item by steve pottinger
What a great new profile photo Ann.
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Hi and thank you for your comment. :-)
Comment is about Richard Alfred (poet profile)
Original item by Richard Alfred
Thanks Laura
Capitals are there because I'm too lazy to edit when I copy from word!
Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)
Original item by Laura Taylor
Thank you Cynthia
your poem held much resonance for me, so I did want you to read mine :)
Regards
Richard
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
I take your point, Richard. 'The Bath' was written some years back, and slightly reworked before posting. But your particular lines 'This bath feels deeper....such danger in being alone' definitely flow along the same thought channel as my idea.
You have a good poem here with great diction developing a strong mood. I did wonder why the issue was clouded between 'drowning' and 'cutting'. I'm also surprised that there are no other comments. But I missed it weeks ago also. Which only emphasizes that good poems often slip under the radar. Never take it personally.
Comment is about Padlock (blog)
Original item by Richard Alfred
Yes, I'm a stubborn mare as you can probably guess! : )
Comment is about Nigel Astell (poet profile)
Original item by Nigel Astell
Thank you Dave, your comment has really given me a boost, Katy x
Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)
Original item by Dave Bradley
Very powerful. There's a poem of mine somewhere on WOL - '1968' - about the one year that the armed forces saw no action. Let's hope there are more 1968's.
Comment is about The Borrow (blog)
Original item by Noetic-fret!
Hi Cynthia
I have just blogged your poem The Parting on www.katypoetess.com and put in a link back to your profile here. Hope that's ok!
Katy
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Hello Noris,
Nice writing.
Keep posting!
Mike
x
Comment is about I waited ... (blog)
Original item by Noris Roberts
.........I like this poem, it touches me.
Mike
Comment is about IF (blog)
and I'm not telling you where to hold a saddo's balls ;-)or did I misread your intention?
Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)
Original item by John Coopey
I bet this did the trick, Ian. You'd have been mustard when you were younger!
Comment is about Twilight Hours (blog)
Original item by Ian Gant
A Saddo's Ball? Where do they hold them, Ian? I could do with a night out.
Comment is about The Ballad Of Billy Nomates (blog)
Original item by Ian Whiteley
As an art student many moons ago I used to travel from Ealing to Cockfosters and back every day and it happened to me on several occasions. I just used to pretend I was asleep!
Comment is about Beautiful (blog)
Original item by Isobel
Hi Laura - not quite sure how to do what you said - but if you go onto Soundcloud then the stuff I've been doing recently with Paul Healy is under the A4453528 account number. I think the last 4 things are me and him - previous stuff just by him. Hope you can find it!
Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)
Original item by Laura Taylor
light flickers
darkness stays
switching off
that memory
if only
you could.
Comment is about One Year Apart (blog)
Original item by Katy Megan
Will you - won't you?
"The answer my friend is blowing in the wind..."
:-))
Comment is about The Rhymes They Are A-Changin' (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Well done Laura its a fab poem and your timing was spot on, looks great on 24 ,
you should be chuffed I am chuffed for you :)
Comment is about Regal Potential (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
A haunting piece this Kath, and I do like the layout, although those pesky capitals at the start of the lines have no business being there!
Comment is about Sycamore Babies (blog)
Original item by Kath Hewitt
Many thanks for your comments, fellas
It's been published today by Poetry24, which I'm a bit chuffed about :)
http://poetry-24.blogspot.co.uk/
Comment is about Regal Potential (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
Hiya - found it! Ta :) What a great poem, and your voice sounds so good on the CD. Blimey though - you wrote a LOT of poems that year!! :D
You could maybe just send me the link to it. Right click on the URL of your soundcloud page, copy, then paste the link onto a message on my profile :)
Aye, thank you, all is grand with me. Great to see you experimenting with the music - look forward to hearing some!
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
A time when the sun shone
Long in the day, smudging
Its shadows
very nice, the lines above well done :)
Comment is about Sycamore Babies (blog)
Original item by Kath Hewitt
Rhyme is perfect for comedy - which is your preferred genre.
You have proved that you can use it to good effect in serious poetry too - your 52 Hertz poem was lovely.
Rhyme only sounds crap when it's forced or overdone - which doesn't matter so much in comedy but can ruin a serious poem.
I like free verse - but good free verse is so hard to write. Variety is the key - be versatile - or just keep on doing what works well...
Comment is about The Rhymes They Are A-Changin' (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Ha ha - you didn't even do it for this one! Keep on...
Comment is about The Rhymes They Are A-Changin' (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Yes, this is funny and would perform oh so well.
Comment is about Beautiful (blog)
Original item by Isobel
Lots to take in on this - has to be your longest one. I love it for its layered beauty and sadness. XX
Comment is about Sycamore Babies (blog)
Original item by Kath Hewitt
This is funny.. i think Dylan should know about this. And the moral... don't let anyone tell you how to write your stuff..
Comment is about The Rhymes They Are A-Changin' (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Thanks for seeing the depth Dave. There's a little bit of the inner me in all the froth I write :)
I'm really looking forward to performing it. I think there's definitely room for audience participation, particularly on the choruses...
Thanks everyone for the feedback - it's much appreciated! xx
Comment is about Beautiful (blog)
Original item by Isobel
hello MC,
Thanks for your thoughts on "Morning Star". As a trainspotter in my juvenile days give me "Evening Star" any day.
Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
Gareth Glyn Roberts
Fri 26th Jul 2013 09:15
Brilliant. Love the soggy bran flakes!
Comment is about Angry Autumn (blog)
Original item by David Blake