This is lovely. Nice one. I believe if the time spent on educating girls is also spent on the boys then there would be no room to defend their actions.?
Comment is about Who is an enemy? (blog)
Original item by Hasmukh Mehta
Big Sal
Fri 27th Apr 2018 18:11
Even on this pale blue dot, we can shine like palladium or a diamond in the rough!
Comment is about the hermit (blog)
Original item by Lilly Love
Laura, thank you - I totally agree dropping the last verse gives the more satisfying result. Will do that. I have found that often switching lines can do the same thing, giving more fluidity and reason to a poem than necessarily trusting to the order of the ideas as they come! Again, your point about contrasts makes total sense. I'm grateful for your fine eye.
Cheers Douglas, that came about with the desire to rhyme, but it does seem rather novel !
Thank you Anya for liking the poem.
Ray
Comment is about TWIN PEAKS (blog)
Original item by ray pool
Personally, I blame Tony Blair. His method of nicking the
useful aspects of Tory policies to appeal to the public and
build on the uncertainties of the lurching government of
the day to achieve power has paved the way for the
major parties to be virtually interchangeable. But, to
borrow from WSC, - better than the alternatives seen elsewhere in the world!
Comment is about Election (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
I can very much relate to these words Douglas.
Comment is about Haikus 2 (blog)
Original item by Douglas MacGowan
I like how you lead us on to think one thing, and then it's another.
I actually think you could lose that last verse altogether, and keep the notion of the twin peaks as those highs and lows. The big thing that I hold onto through lows of my own is that I know from experience they will pass. And that they have to exist together, otherwise how would we be able to define one or the other, without its opposite for contrast?
Simple but punchy. Great poem Ray.
Comment is about TWIN PEAKS (blog)
Original item by ray pool
20th poem for NaPoWriMo 2018. No official prompt used, or needed, in the face of this:
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/apr/26/bill-cosby-guilty-trial-sexual-assault
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/dec/31/bill-cosby-sexual-abuse-claims-57-women-dates-public-accusations
Comment is about Just The One (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
thanks for your like!?
Comment is about Today’s Relationship- The Latest Version (blog)
Original item by Bindu Trigunayak
Haha Hannah - they really do!
Nice work Trev - your stamina has been greater than mine!
Comment is about Weather (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
Thanks for your suggestion, Ray. I'll surely work on it.
Binte
Comment is about Rumination (blog)
Original item by Binte Afroz
"Losing diamonds in search of glitters". Beautiful line. Really emotive.
Comment is about Today’s Relationship- The Latest Version (blog)
Original item by Bindu Trigunayak
Darry & Brian,
Thank you for your comments. Keith
Comment is about Justice and Peace (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
elPintor
Fri 27th Apr 2018 00:57
Wow, Anya--you're very sweet to say such a thing. Truthfully, most days I feel more like, as Forrest might say, "stupid is as stupid does." Eh, no offense meant to darling Forrest--he's way out of my league.
Many thanks, Anya, right back at ya' x
Rachel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGAwNV7WBIQ
Comment is about editor at large (blog)
Original item by nunya
Anthony Emmerson
Thu 15th Dec 2011 21:50
He would have approved Tommy. Probably the most honest thinker comedy's ever seen.
Regards,
A.E.
Comment is about Anthony Emmerson (poet profile)
Original item by Anthony Emmerson
A clever and (sadly) true portrait of the systems we live with.
Comment is about Election (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
A full capture of all sides of a relationship.
Comment is about Protect You (blog)
Original item by Damon Blackery
I like the switch of the much more common “highs and lows”. Gives that line a pause and a beat.
Comment is about TWIN PEAKS (blog)
Original item by ray pool
We hope that giving up the body will be a moment of peace. Who knows 'til the time comes. The idea of silence is effective here and pivotal to the experience. May I suggest that to drop the second "near" might give more impact?
With respect.
Ray
Comment is about Rumination (blog)
Original item by Binte Afroz
Thank you both Hannah and Anya.The fun of poetry is you never what may come to the mind. The reason I wrote this is that I do furniture restoration and feel a close bond with wood and how stuff is constructed. Much appreciated.
Thanks too Col and Binte for the likes!
Ray
Comment is about RESTORATION (blog)
Original item by ray pool
It's real when other poets/poets to be can relate hardcore about what someone else is feeling or going through..love No Take Backs!
Comment is about No Take Backs. (blog)
Original item by Nick
So much pain in your words but then again writing through our pain is what does this- amazing poetry.??..3?s Up
Comment is about Fuck. (blog)
Original item by Nick
Local elections are a good excuse to rattle any government's
cot and threaten to remove their toys - commonly known as
a "protest vote", I recall. I will be interested in how things
turn out (with what sort of "turn out"?) next Thursday.
The country seems at odds with itself - with the multi-
Metropolitan masses tending to vote one way and the shires
- with their established traditions and retired folk, another
way. But come the day, there might be a few surprises.
as well as a few failed fortune-tellers' prophesies!
Just look at how "they" forecast the
end of UKIP when a legal suit from 3
Labour MPs threatened to bankrupt
the Party. No quite the case when
the sum was met and exceeded - to
put UKIP back in the running to
keep the government up to snuff
about a proper Brexit. As the old
saying goes: a week is a long time
in politics and the coming week
could cause a few upsets.
What fun!
Comment is about The Labour Party (blog)
Original item by Wendy Higson
Great words of compassion and comfort. Thank you for this. Keith
Comment is about Painkiller (blog)
Original item by Ian Whiteley
Slightly tongue-in-cheek. Slightly.
Comment is about Election (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
its so beautiful its genius wow i love it i can say i can read it over and over and over an never get bored of it , its magic ?
Comment is about Signals (blog)
Original item by Matt Tyldesley
And very well deserved too. I listened to all of the poets, and they were all excellent.
Comment is about Working class communities: Bread and Roses winners announced (article)
Original item by Mike Took
<Deleted User> (5011)
Thu 26th Apr 2018 12:22
What a remarkable poem. I agree that the third stanza carries the message but, for some reason, for me it's the final stanza that nails it. Wow.
Comment is about 'Others around me, others by the window, silently looking out' (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Thanks for the comments on 'Killing the Piano' Ray, I'm glad you liked it. That one always strikes a chord (pun intended!) with people who play or who grew up with a piano around the house. It's one of those little tragedies of the modern world, I think.
Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)
Original item by ray pool
Thanks for the comment on 'Killing the Piano' Hugh, glad you liked it!
Comment is about hugh (poet profile)
Original item by hugh
Perhaps I wasn't clear by distracting you with the word 'climax'.
I do understand your point throughout, but the final line doesn't do that point justice or adhere to the cadence.
It is frustratingly close, though.
Comment is about Last Word (blog)
Original item by RightInTheFeels
I totally agree Trevor. I love the weather - in all guises.
Comment is about Weather (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
Thu 26th Apr 2018 09:18
You surprised me and made me laugh. What a silly snail.
Comment is about Life in the slow lane (blog)
Original item by hugh
Thu 26th Apr 2018 09:12
Very nice rhythm and rhyme. Short and sweet.
Comment is about A River, Kent (blog)
Original item by Chris Bainbridge
Good Morning Rachel,
Thank you for your observations which I appreciate. I wrote this as a believer who sees the end times as the coming of Christ but as a prelude to this he will overcome and destroy all evil. The victory will be His. The last four lines of the poem look to our emancipation following the end. I hope this makes sense. Thank you again. Keith
Comment is about The End Times (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
Thu 26th Apr 2018 08:54
Very cute and fun. Is this really about a cat? Or a slick dancing man? I think cats are really great. I have 7.
Comment is about Foxtrot Fergus (blog)
Original item by eve nortley
<Deleted User> (13762)
Thu 26th Apr 2018 08:32
Well done on POTW Hugh and thanks for taking the time to read my latest. A bit of humorous writing here on WoL is always very much appreciated. Keep 'em coming. All the best, Colin.
Comment is about ‘The Unlucky Vicar’ by Hugh is Write Out Loud’s Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by steve pottinger
Cheers Stu,
Always appreciate your feedback. Many thanks!
Hope you are well.
Suki
Comment is about Arachnid Death Star Vs IKEA/ I Am Starfucker Star Child (blog)
Original item by Suki Spangles
Let's hope we can do it in Rome next Wednesday. Mo has been special - beyond expectation. Coutinho must wonder why he left..
Suki
Comment is about Mo Salah (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
seeking shadows as if they were doors..
Wonderful line Rachel.
Thanks for sharing..
Suki
Comment is about darkroom (blog)
Original item by nunya
Hey Joe!
I've been catching up on your poetry and liked what I read - you're already on my list of favourites.
Like Harry, I like the 'run' of this - the seeming ease of your 'conversation'.
I can also relate very strongly to exactly what you're saying - it's like you wrote it for me!
I worked in a bank for 7 years - it paid the mortgage but one day I recognized the wheel and decided to jump off.
Taking myself to university mean I was back to square one, money wise but my soul was singing...
Thank you for your words which strangely feel (now) like validation.
Comment is about Your Revolution (blog)
Original item by Joe Williams
A beautiful tribute, written with tenderness.
My mother always regretted the lose of her baby grand - sold by her step-mother without permission.
My brother bought my mother an upright, many years later, in Africa but I don't know what happened to it... one day I came home from a working holiday and it was gone.
My man brought his electric upright with him and I love it but wish he'd play it for me more often.
Although, the last big family-from-Ireland reunion involved a sing-a-long with Uncle Billy at the piano and my man on guitar - such good craic!
There are lots of reasons I love this poem - not least of which it's inspiring! Hmmmm...
Comment is about Killing the Piano (blog)
Original item by Joe Williams
elPintor
Thu 26th Apr 2018 00:45
Hi Keith. There is one idea that besets me as I read this and that is that there is no relative idea that can exist without its juxtaposing positive and negative, and no one absolute that can be perceived without its opposite on a spectrum--no high without low, no light without dark. Even in the biblical end times, the left and the right are mentioned. Can evil be truly banished? Or only out of sight for a few?
But then, you leave us with a question...
I appreciate the spark, Keith. Netflix is quite a bore.
Rachel
Comment is about The End Times (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
elPintor
Wed 25th Apr 2018 23:23
Hey, everyone. I sometimes get the idea that bringing such images to life through writing has the ability to do some small amount of harm, if to no one else but the writer. I had a dream of the yearling only last night, but she was a small and vicious creature and nothing like I envisioned when I wrote this.
Thanks to all for reading.
Rachel
Comment is about darkroom (blog)
Original item by nunya
This is particularly poignant and relevant to me Joe, as I have been a pro pianist for fifty years, and inherited the love of the instrument from my father, who was a good player. It was common for most families to have a piano - a matter of pride, and there were many music shops selling song copies. There were dozens of manufacturers in the UK, street parties had them out of doors etc etc. I sold mine for £100 after 30 years use. The cost of tuning and transporting other nails in the coffin.( I believe Lloyd Webber still has one, so that's ok.) It's actually cheaper to buy a Chinese piano than to restore one now.
Great writing with plenty of heft .
Ray
Comment is about Killing the Piano (blog)
Original item by Joe Williams
A sad note, but music to my ears,well done.
Comment is about Killing the Piano (blog)
Original item by Joe Williams
Thanks Karin, I'm glad you liked the poem ? It's a true story, more or less.
Comment is about Karin Seaver (poet profile)
Original item by Karin Seaver
<Deleted User> (13740)
Fri 27th Apr 2018 22:53
Is this referring to Sylvia Plath, for I imagine she did have a light within, although Ted's infidelities, drove her to distraction, Edward if I may call you that?...
Comment is about You're No Sylvia (blog)
Original item by Edward Coleman