Great poem, Laura. One for the next collection, without a doubt.
Comment is about The Ties That Bind (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
A poem to be venerated. Well done!
Thank you
Keith
Comment is about The Ties That Bind (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
d.k.,
This is one of your best poems to date as you captivate perfectly the ambience of a restaurant in full flood. As with all good descriptive poetry you take the reader into the restaurant and allow his or her imagination to be free.
Thank you for this
Keith
Comment is about Restaurant (blog)
Original item by d.knape
I think I was persuaded to write this by the conceit on display. Anyone would think the rest of us lived in a vacuum. There is also
the readiness to "believe" in what is insisted on as the cause(s)
of what is now described as "global warming/climate change".
Humanity has a record down the centuries of meeting danger with awareness- something no other living creature possesses.
Let's keep that awareness and do all we can to counter malign
man-made effects on the world and use rational hysteria-free mindsets to enable our responses. Let us ALSO respect the
massive rarely addressed influence of sun storms/spots/flares on
the climate. In January 1661, in a world free from industrial/toxic
effluent, the diarist Samuel Pepys wrote of the weather in the
winter of 1660/1661. I quote verbatim for its relevance:
"It is strange what weather we have had all this winter; no cold
at all; but the ways are dusty, and the flyes(sic) fly up and down,
and the rose-bushes are full of leaves, such a time of the year as
was never known in this world here," Living requires a rational perspective, free from fear and hyperbole. Let us act accordingly.
Comment is about PROTEST (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
<Deleted User> (21487)
Sat 20th Apr 2019 12:25
WOW! well done - well said.
Your poem should be displayed in all public places.
Dorothy
Comment is about The Ties That Bind (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
Keith we are world's apart theistically but I understand your disgruntled view of the current goings on in many of the church's factions.
What I would take issue with (with all due respect of course) are your comments........
.........'filled with dismay to see society and the world more than ever engaged in violence and greed'.
Surely, it has ever been thus with much evidence of the same in the bible itself.
Being Christian, for want of a better word, is as you imply, being kind, chivalrous, loving and tolerant, none of which require a church.
Greed is such a vicious entity that it always finishes up consuming itself. This is certainly true in the commercial world and is clearly represented in the human condition.
thought provoking work!
Comment is about This Friday (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
Sat 20th Apr 2019 12:08
So YOU are the Sleepy Head.
Actually I get up at 4-5am
to get my poems into WOL,
a 6 hour difference.
Comment is about keith jeffries (poet profile)
Original item by keith jeffries
Day 20, Napowrimo 2019
http://www.napowrimo.net/
Today's prompt: write a poem grounded in language as it is spoken – not necessarily the grand, dramatic speech of a monologue or play, but the messy, fractured, slangy way people speak in real life.
Comment is about The Ties That Bind (blog)
Original item by Laura Taylor
thanks for the comment on 'AmericaZ' Keith - glad you liked it ?
Comment is about keith jeffries (poet profile)
Original item by keith jeffries
Dorothy,
Thank you indeed for your contribution and comment. I value the opinions of others when offered constructively and with kindness. You will notice that every second line of the poem begins with the word "we", this includes me, perhaps more than most. I no longer attend attend any church as I am at odds with the Institution for a variety of reasons, however this has not affected my personal faith, for which I am grateful.
I am passionate about Justice and Peace yet filled with dismay to see society and the world more than ever engaged in violence and greed. This is what drives me. Christian ethics motivate me as they have our legal system for centuries.
Thank you again, it is much appreciated.
Keith
Comment is about This Friday (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
<Deleted User> (21487)
Sat 20th Apr 2019 08:16
Keith
I regected my Catholic Faith on the day that I left school and experienced a great sense of relief - but - I retained a sense of what is right.
I have also retained a sense of 'presence' and I have no idea what I mean by that, It is not a 'God' in any shape or form, and Faiths mean nothing to me, I think that they are dangerous, It maybe an awareness of the natural world - but who knows?
I feel strongly that 'Our' role in life is to nuture all life for the future of all, both people and nature.
Sounds a bit self-righteous, and I can't always live up to it, but it beats being told to believe in stories that are not believable and to recite words that have no real meaning.
You mention apathy and fear I would like to add selfishness to that list and also the determination of some to be 'Top Dog' without thought of others.
Dorothy
P,S, I have expierenced 'Good Will' within this blog so I know that some WoLers feel the same.
Comment is about This Friday (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
Sat 20th Apr 2019 07:36
Hi Keith, thanks for your comments, I’m glad your imagination has been stimulated by these haiku. Much appreciate you saying so.
Hi Steve, these are four separate poems but the the first three where written at the same time, so I think there is some kind of link between them. Perhaps through the thoughts or emotions I had at the time.
Thanks for pointing out the difference between haiku and Senryu, much appreciated.
Will look up the poetry of Nick Virgillo. Thanks for your time and encouragement.
Thank you Randy, mona and Damon for the likes.
All the best des
Comment is about Senryu 1 (blog)
Original item by DESMOND CHILDS
sorry MC - conviction - fat fingers and alcohol ?
Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
David,
Honest, true and humorous.
Thank you for this..
Keith
Comment is about THE COLLECTOR (blog)
Original item by David Subacchi
You can find more of my poetry including performance videos here on Write Out Loud or simply by searching on line for DAVID SUBACCHI.
Comment is about THE COLLECTOR (blog)
Original item by David Subacchi
Jennifer and Steve,
If I may address you together despite your different comments. I do not mention Christianity or any other Faith group in this poem. I am endeavouring to address a moral decline in society whose values have been diluted or diminished. Religion once played an important part but no longer; with no alternative moral compass to replace it. In my lifetime I have witnessed a society which is self ridden, where communities have fragmented, where wealth speaks louder than need. When most people rejected Christianity they threw the baby out with the bath water. It was goodbye to Church and God which was followed by secularism, greed, self agrandisment and relativism and nothing to combat them. In the span of my life time I have seen the demise of decency. This is not wholly attributable to the absence of religion, Church or God. It is a trend which stems from secularism.
The situation is not beyond redemption. Its opponents are apathy and fear. It is interesting Jennifer that it is you who mention Christianity nor a slip of the pen that I wrote this on Good Friday.
Thank you both for reading this poem and making your well founded comments, which I appreciate greatly
Keith
Comment is about This Friday (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
Hi Keith. A truly zealous post which neatly précis the woes of all mankind (and womankind). I just wonder who saved the souls of the pre Christians, or were they automatically condemned through lack of guidance? The Christian Church as far as I am aware hijacked existing means of worship and converted people who already had a religion.
I am not sure who your sincerely held feelings here are designed to reach. There are actually some of us who have our own designs for living a full and humane existence, and reading your poem just makes me feel inadequate under the light that it shines out. I hope that makes sense; I know you are a very caring and reasonable person. Just wanted to put my point of view!
Some of the tone of the writing reminds me of doorstep pleas from Jehovah's Witnesses.
Ray
Comment is about This Friday (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
Forgive them father for they know not what they say.
Comment is about PROTEST (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
Thanks Keith and Mona for the likes, and Frances and Jane for the comments as well. As so many WOL members appear to be mature, oldies, senior citizens, whichever you prefer, hope it may strike some cords! The beast has been making rather too many strikes recently!
Jennifer
Comment is about Old age (blog)
Original item by Jennifer Malden
Loved this - can be read in many ways. Jennifer
Comment is about The Hypnotist (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
Hi Keith! Presumably about our rejection of Christianity? ... backs turned against love and acceptance - we have abandoned all that was given - we can return as a welcome awaits us.... . If not, n p as I am famous (in the family) for being as thick as a post! (As they are allo male, this doesn't unduly distress me!) If I am on the right track, it seems to me that the problem is that nothing else has appeared as a substitute for the basic ethics of Christanity - to pursue the worthless and uncertain - to seek instant gratification daily have always been against these. Great writing anyway - food for thought.
Jennifer
Comment is about This Friday (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
elPintor
Fri 19th Apr 2019 19:55
Thanks Jane, Ray, David, and Graham (that's like a phonics lesson, those names all arranged in such a way). Your comments are much appreciated. There's quite a bit to address within them, I'm only sorry that I've been so busy that I haven't been able to come up with an intelligible response.
We're all animals, fer sher, it simply seems that we humans are the only animals capable of thinking ourselves into oblivion--why oh why were we cursed with these damned thumbs?
Rachel
Comment is about animals (blog)
Original item by nunya
Very enjoyable for the neutral, MC. Murder for me.
Comment is about VAR MAN (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
<Deleted User> (18980)
Fri 19th Apr 2019 17:31
MC You forgot to mention all the bright young things who have a right to ' go travelling' all around the world, and not by bicycle or skateboard by the way.
Bring back Boris' water cannon I say!
Comment is about PROTEST (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
Today's 'official' prompt was to write an 'Abecedarian' poem. Well, I tried...
Comment is about In Tune (blog)
Original item by Trevor Alexander
Ian - it was "conviction of purpose" that you misquoted
as a quote from me in your reply on my home page.
Cheers
MC
Comment is about Ian Whiteley (poet profile)
Original item by Ian Whiteley
Is Pep Guardiola singing that old refrain -
So near and yet so VAR...?!
An extraordinary match - full of entertainment and drama.
Comment is about VAR MAN (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
<Deleted User> (21487)
Fri 19th Apr 2019 16:42
Josie this is a beautiful poem - so full of hurt - that it hurts to read it.
Dorothy
Comment is about Tiny (blog)
Original item by Josie Harris
d.k., I always turn my computer off before going to bed to avoid any such inappropriate behaviour Sometimes they can get quite loud.
Keith
Comment is about keith jeffries (poet profile)
Original item by keith jeffries
Hi Jason, thank you for commenting. I think this poem was about more than snakes - I think it's about love and intimacy.
Comment is about The Hypnotist (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
Hi Steve, yes that phrase could easily be left out - it just fitted with the weird little rhythm that was going on in my head at the time.
Comment is about The Hypnotist (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
d.k.,
A good poem. I always cherish those last few minutes of sleep, reluctant to let go of such comfort.
Thank you
Keith
Comment is about Sleepy Head (blog)
Original item by d.knape
Thanks very much, Ray.
Comment is about The Poem of the Week is 'Texas Tornadoes and the Power of Prayer' by Randy Horton (article)
Original item by Stuart Buck
Ian,
I take my hat off to you. Blunt, eloquent and straight to the point. The wall in the mouth had me in stitches.
Thank you indeed.
Keith
Comment is about AmericaZ (blog)
Original item by Ian Whiteley
Fri 19th Apr 2019 12:32
A stairway to Heaven?
Comment is about Lisa C Bassignani (poet profile)
Original item by Lisa C Bassignani
Fri 19th Apr 2019 12:29
emojis drive you crazy? me too.
but...they're everywhere.
i think they breed at night, in the computer.
Comment is about keith jeffries (poet profile)
Original item by keith jeffries
Fri 19th Apr 2019 12:27
emojis are the little icons that you can add to an e-mail.
like happy faces, or thumbs up.
they're everywhere!
Comment is about Lisa C Bassignani (poet profile)
Original item by Lisa C Bassignani
thanks for commenting on 'down at the end of lonely street' Jennifer - yes Elvis had a unique voice and talent - not so sure about Buble though ?
Ian
Comment is about Jennifer Malden (poet profile)
Original item by Jennifer Malden
thanks for commenting on 'elegy for a ghost' Laura - I know you've been through similar grieving and, as you say, it doesn't get easier with time ?
Ian
Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)
Original item by Laura Taylor
I love the insight into the mutual dance of snake and charmer Hazel. I've always thought of it as more of a dance of intellect vs venom and lightning speed. Although I prefer the snakes to be in their own environment. Great poem.
J. x
Comment is about The Hypnotist (blog)
Original item by Hazel ettridge
Thank you all, Chelsea, Dorothy and Frances. To be honest it was written with the rhythm of a particular song that got stuck in my head, although if you heard the original it's so much better, that's probably why it scans like a song. Chelsea, I too have spent many hours talking with people at the bars I used to work in and you're totally right, they were some of the most interesting people I've ever spoken to, especially the, "eccentric, strong personalities," I'm really pleased that you like talking to them too.
J. x
Comment is about Old Man At The Bar (blog)
Original item by Jason Bayliss
Hi Randy. I'm a great fan of dialects and speech patterns and this is a winner on that score alone - but the whole ethos of the piece is terrific. The simple belief systems brought to bear on the catastrophic natural events says so much about the American historical context.
I Enjoyed this immensely. Congratulations well earned for POTW.
Ray
Comment is about The Poem of the Week is 'Texas Tornadoes and the Power of Prayer' by Randy Horton (article)
Original item by Stuart Buck
Keith,
You have a keen sense of perception, reflected by your words .. Thank you for reading, appreciating and taking out time to comment on the poem.
Mona
Comment is about Memories (blog)
Original item by mona s
Characteristic nonsense from Yours Truly again, Kev.
Comment is about A TRIP TO THE DENTIST (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Frances Macaulay Forde
Fri 19th Apr 2019 08:51
I love it too, Jason. I particularly liked you human approach to the old man... looking deeper into him.
Good stuff. ?
Comment is about Old Man At The Bar (blog)
Original item by Jason Bayliss
<Deleted User> (21487)
Fri 19th Apr 2019 08:34
Jason
I do love this and I agree with Ray - it is a folk song - just waiting for a guitar and a bar stool.
Dorothy
Comment is about Old Man At The Bar (blog)
Original item by Jason Bayliss
raypool
Sat 20th Apr 2019 16:20
Thanks for reading and liking Philip...
Hi David, even though your comment shows marks of levity, you put my thoughts pretty much into context. You know me enough to penetrate my psyche, so I won't labour on about the poem. This was a rewrite of one I discarded which was like a warning but I thought lacked atmosphere (or threat).
Steve, Hi and thanks for taking the trouble . I suppose poetry can be a little like trying on clothes - some don't quite fit or are the wrong colour etc. As long as you liked the idea I'm happy. As for the structure - it was written without a lot of thought to the form of it.
There may be reasons for your considerations of punctuation that had we the time might be resolved . Sadly, I won't be subjecting it to the pros who might tear it apart with their best intentions.
Ray
Comment is about ON MUSHROOM HILL (blog)
Original item by ray pool